Started potty-training DD2 when she turned 3 in April. She was extremely reluctant but eventually got the hang of it bar the odd accident. In September she started nursery (at DD1's school so not wholly unfamiliar environment) and DS was born, since when she has started wetting and pooing herself almost daily. Have tried retraining with star chart, rewards etc but no joy, and we are becoming increasingly frustrated and finding it hard not be cross with her. Today she wet herself almost as soon as she was dressed, then did two wees on the toilet (once while out at the cinema) then pooed herself very messily while sitting at the computer and about two minutes after I asked her if she needed a poo . She is clearly able to use the toilet so I assume it's a behavioural issue (probably related to nursery and new baby) -- can some kind MNers please help me get her back on track?
Don't ask her if she needs to go. Either leave her to it or tell her it's time to go. My DS is a bit younger, but when he was potty training, I found that he was able to hold on while ignoring the urge to go. If asked, the answer was always no, but then his awareness had been raised to his need and it was then unstoppable. HTH