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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Potty training

DD Terrified of poo.... and its sending me to the funny farm

40 replies

BlueBumedFly · 18/09/2009 09:22

DD potty trained for wee practically on her own at 2.4 and was very keen to just get on with it. Job done.

Now she is terrified of pooing. It can take days which means she gets terribly constipated from holding back and then it is painful. A whole day can be spoilt as she cries and cries with the pressure, sits down, screams blue murder then gives up.

I am going a bit doolally and my patience is wearing just a little thin.

So, please any advice? We always encourage her to be in the bathroom with us, has seen us poo (sorry TMI I know) but I have covered that angle well and truly!

She is also v constipated. Eats no wheat to speak of, eats fruit, drinks apple juice and water and now is on lactolose but nothing seems to help.

Please help me?

TIA

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girlsyearapart · 18/09/2009 09:32

Can't help but am in same situation.
My dd started pt at 22 months at her own insistence.
She started off really well and the only accidents she had were ones were she asked for potty and then missed/got there too late.
Then all of a sudden there was a major regression with the poo.
She now refuses to do it on the potty or toilet tries sitting for a few seconds up to about 5 times then eventually its too late and the poo ends up on the floor.

Have bloody well had enough of clearing up poo all flippin day long.

She won't wear nappies just takes them off straight away..

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BlueBumedFly · 18/09/2009 09:38

I sooo sympathize and I have had enough as well. DD has now need to poo for 24 hours and is steadfastly holding it in.... and moaning and crying all the way.

DD won't wear nappies either as she is a 'big girl'.... ahhhhhhh, then do a poo!!!!

Nice, as I am typing she is wobbling my upper arms (bingo wings) going hahahahaha mummy wiggly Nice.

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girlsyearapart · 18/09/2009 12:33

HaHa bbf! Think this is turning into a compulsive pooers support thread instead?!

Yes to the joy of holding in the poo.

Dd did this for 48 hours before we went to Majorca a few weeks ago.

she decided to let it all go as we were nearing Majorcan passport control on the travelator..

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BlueBumedFly · 18/09/2009 13:18

Euw!!!

Finally after making DD run around the park for 2 hours today and a massive lunch (for her) she finally gave in.

She just seems terrified of the actual 'object' screams so loud and high pitched and points at it! It was so high pitched I think all the dogs in the surrounding area are now at our door!!

pmsl at the Majorca story, good grief, what a nightmare for you! Euw euw euw!

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girlsyearapart · 18/09/2009 18:22

Yep lovely stuff! The passport man didn't
even bother looking at our passports just waved us through..

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BlueBumedFly · 18/09/2009 19:33

HaHa!! It gets better, I bet he told his whole family that night at dinner! Hee Hee

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girlsyearapart · 18/09/2009 20:43

Will keep you posted on our future happy poo related tales!

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devotion · 18/09/2009 20:52

hello

i remember my brother also going through when he was little (not now ) my mum bought some brown plasticine and rolled it into poo shapes and put it in the toilet, sat him on it and then shouted, "hooray, you did a poo - look" My brother was delighted with himself then my mum told him to finish it off and he did a poo... fooling a child is not always nice but in this case it was needed

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BlueBumedFly · 18/09/2009 22:22

Love it!!!

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floaty · 18/09/2009 22:27

We had this problem,eventually we saw a homeopath,problem practically solved.

But in addition can recemmend swimming!

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girlsyearapart · 19/09/2009 07:17

Loving the plasticine story!

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BlueBumedFly · 19/09/2009 07:41

Floaty - what did they prescribe?

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girlsyearapart · 19/09/2009 07:55

Morning bbf-ready for another fun filled day of poo/not poo??

This morning dd said 'Mummy please may I do a poo?' then sat on the potty for a few mins.

Nothing happened but was impressed anyway.

want to go to Asda but can't face the thought of clearing up poo from inside the trolley seat..

Will wait.

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BlueBumedFly · 19/09/2009 09:04

Girls - hee hee (dry heave) poo from shopping trollly... Pmsl. Poor you.

And so the day starts.... Poo day or non poo day ....only they know for sure .....

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BlueBumedFly · 19/09/2009 12:18

Girls? Bathroom floor.. again... oh, and leg, arm, me, potty, bath..... I had just finished cleaning the bathroom as well. Joy.

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girlsyearapart · 20/09/2009 06:46

good day bad day yesterday.
Braved the asda trip and she tried a few times there but nothing and no accidents.

Got home put her to bed.

Got phonecall fil in hosp w serious heart attack,

dd woke up poo in her pull ups.

Dumped the dds on my sister.

Went to the hosp. fil stabilised but having an op so couldn't see him.

Went to pick up dds got flat tyre on way.

At my sisters house dd said ' may i do a poo?' then sat on potty and (drum roll please) actually did one!

dd2 then fell off bed whilst dh was getting her undressed for bath- don't think his mind was on the job..

she was fine though.

hohum today's another day

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BlueBumedFly · 20/09/2009 12:09

Oh poor you guys, how is your fil today?

Brilliant about the poo result though... Perhaps it's beggining to click? Perhaps all the pressure/focus being elsewhere was what was needed to encourage normality? Perhaps we need to ignore ignore ignore then with a pleading audience they may give up the game and just get on with it?

Hope today is better for you xxx

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girlsyearapart · 20/09/2009 17:57

Thanks. Fil is 'satisfactory' today and hopefully moving out of intensive care tonight or tomorrow to a ward. DH is totally ignoring the whole thing and has gone out to watch footie and get drunk. .

Dd has been great today 5 poos all on toilet or potty. One wee accident which was my fault as she told me a few times she needed to go but we were coming back from shops and I was trying to rush her home.

Yes think maybe the ignoring approach could be a winner? Also the day before i told her we were going to give away all her lovely knickers (peppa pig, sparkly fairies etc) if she carried on.

Who knows??? x

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crumbled · 20/09/2009 19:52

You all seem quite calm about this little problem, however, I am seriously loosing the plot. My ds, 2.5 was a dream potty training with wees and not so bad at poos (at first) but we now have the worst dramas imaginable when he needs a poo. Like bbf we had moaning for DAYS about needing a poo but he's utterly terrified of actually pushing the god damn thing out! We have hystronics, full on, every time. He is not constipated, poos are totally normal and soft, daddy is a doctor and makes sure 'poo medicine' is given to alleviate any possible discomfort. So what the hell do I do? I feel like I've tried everything and now I feel like I really have crumbled!

I'm listening to the ignoring approach but he's in SO much distress and is SO loud about it that it will be mightly difficult!

If anyone has any other suggestions, please post them. Thank you

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BlueBumedFly · 20/09/2009 21:55

Girls - good luck with fil, much love and hope dh has s stinking hangover! They desk with things so differently eh? I remember when my fil was first diagnosed v poorly dh went and fell asleep. Odd but I guess it's a protection mechanism. Good news on 5 poos, we are still in trauma and no poo today.

Crumbled; I guess everything is relative. This year has been total shite so am desperately trying to be calm otherwise they will be round in their little white van in little white coats to come and take me away (ha ha)!

I am not sure what to do but going with ignoring now although it is like nails down a blackboard and inveriably ends up with poo done in pants. We also have 'meds' and poo is now v soft so it is all a fear factor. I am truly at a loss and having spent the best part of the day in a&e with sdd2 I am fit for nothing but a large glass of vino.

Sorry to rant .

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girlsyearapart · 21/09/2009 07:23

Yes bbf DH is currently in bed which smells like a brewery..
We're going to see fil this avo. He's still on the cardiac ICU as blood clots not dispersed but is apparently looking better.

Why the A&E visit?? Also had a glass of vino last night. V necessary.

Hi Crumbled- welcome to pooers/non pooers anonymous! You may have seen we have no solutions but it's nice to rant about it here.

Here's hoping it's a phase that will pass and QUICK!

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BlueBumedFly · 21/09/2009 19:47

Oh long story, issues with SDD2. Might ask for help on a thread but think I may have to name change!!

No poo today which means by tomorrow it will be 3 days..... good grief.

I am so tired now and still working... bleugh.

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hobnob57 · 22/09/2009 22:33

DD became poo phobic after successful potty training at about 2.5. A colleague at work had a DD who did the same for years. He got fed up and sat with her on the toilet for 2.5 hours one night and wouldn't let her down until she'd done one. There were hysterics and much protesting, but when she finally did one, he gave her a chocolate. He said she cottoned on really quickly, and now poos in installments to ensure that she maximises her chocolate intake. They're now rationing it re. size of poo... I think she's about 4.

So we tried the '1 chocolate button per plop' tactic - much against my principles but were willing to try anything after sometimes going 4-5 days with no poo (I think trialling her with dairy after being intolerant contributes, perhaps?). It has had reasonable success. She's very proud when she does a poo and immediately asks for her chocolate, but there are days when the allure of a button just isn't enough to sway her. we're averaging one poo/3 days a the moment (age 2.10).

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BlueBumedFly · 23/09/2009 19:44

Hobnob - that is an excellent idea. She loves chocolate buttons. Our issue as well in pooing in pants... How how how do I reverse that?

Off to buy chocolate buttons ....

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hobnob57 · 23/09/2009 20:48

DD only gets buttons if it's in the loo. We've managed to wean her off the potty that way, it may work for pants too. It just took a couple of times saying 'that's great, wow you did a poo! Shame it wasn't in the toilet or else you could have had a chocolate button. Do you think you'll remember to do it in the toilet next time?' and she soon cottoned on.

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