Potty training won't poo

[Adopterdad]

We started potty training in March. My daughter is perfect at wees haven't had accident in months but won't poo on toilet. She was ok at first sometimes pooping sometimes having accidents but then had diarrhoea for a week since then she only poos in knickers - we normally get pre smell but she insists she doesn't want a poo then 5 mins later has one in knickers. We normally see it coming so can get away with just changing knickers but she starts school nursery in September. she poos once or twice a day generally at same times - her poos are soft but solid - Any advice as we cant work out what to do other than wait and hope ( we tell her to poo in toilet or to tell us if she needs a poo every accident she has)

[Tavannach]

Is she's peeing using a trainer seat on the loo? If so the problem probably isn't that she's afraid she'll fall in. I'd use a potty till she stops having accidents. But if she starts school in September she'll quickly get the hang of it from the other children. She won't be the only one who's not completely trained though, so you can relax about that.

[Tavannach]

And a couple of chocolate buttons for every success, of course.

[SubisYodrethwhenLarping]

It is not unusual at all of them to be "frightened" of pooing into the toilet

Not really frightened obviously but hopefully you get what I mean

How old is she now?

How about when you are expecting it to happen you could go into the bathroom with her and some new books and you read to her while she is sitting on the toilet

Not mentioning about - do you want a poo, has it happened yet etc etc just concentrate on reading some new story books

Then it will be a happy non stressful activity when she has all of your attention to herself for 15 mins or however long it takes

You could combine it with going down the sticker chart route after every poo in the toilet

[SubisYodrethwhenLarping]

Oh sorry just read the op again so she is about to be 4

[Adopterdad]

Shes nearly 3 - I will try books - shes not frightened of sitting on loo as she sits on it after poo. It genuinely seems like she can't feel poo coming

[SubisYodrethwhenLarping]

Ok if you think she doesn't realise it is going to happen beforehand then deffo get some books to read her

Then she will be sitting on the toilet and it will happen - hopefully

Make it a relaxed time of reading on a one to one time

Good luck

[GreenTulips]

Remove her to the bathroom

Make her wait while you slowly get fresh clothes and undies - really take you time

Give her a shower and change her

Don’t speak - matter of fact

She’ll soon learn that it’s quicker to poo in the toilet!

[RaggeddeeAnn]

My youngest had a poo problem. She couldn’t do it with one of us hovering about. She started to hold it in and deny she needed a poo...then she’d hide or stand and pretend she wasn’t pooing and poo in her knickers.
Shy poo
So we started a bedtime routine of after her bath, she’d sit on the potty and look/read a few books by herself in her room. We’d not hover outside or check on her but leave her in privacy. We’d say, just read through these three books and see if the poo wants to come out. Just call us if you poo or you finish the books and no poo.
It worked really well. After first successes we showed her how to wipe herself and then migrated to toilet. She just couldn’t poo with anyone watching or if she thought we’d pop our heads round the door at any moment to ask about poo. Doing it after bath time was recommended by a fellow mum who said it relaxes the body and stimulates digestive system so it’s more likely she’d have quick success and not get frustrated.