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4 year old won’t Poo in the toilet.

(15 Posts)
201418 Sun 17-Feb-19 12:55:40

Started potty training last year with my 2 three year old boys. One now is completely dry at night and no problems at all but my other boy is waiting til bed time to have a poo🙈

He dances about when needing i try to get him to the toilet but absolutely refuses to go.

Any advice would be greatful

OP’s posts: |
Littlefish Sun 17-Feb-19 13:02:04

Have a look at the "Eric" website. They have some excellent advice for helping children move on from pooing in a nappy to pooing on the toilet. There are lots of gradual stages to go through.

mintbiscuit Sun 17-Feb-19 13:03:53

I don’t have any advice but wanted to let you know I’m in the same boat. DD is 3.5 years old. Will happily wee in toilet but refuses to poo in there (or potty).

We’ve gone back to her wearing pull ups during the day as fed up with poo in her knickers!

Was getting really frustrated with her which I know doesn’t help, so have decided to go with the flow in the hope that she starts to feel more comfortable pooing in the toilet in her own time. Nursery have been supportive of her going back into pull ups too.

sarah1752 Sun 17-Feb-19 18:17:07


I made an account just to share my experience, my daughter is 3.5 and she will not poo in the toilet. She will beg for a nappy and have a tantrum and poo in her pants if she doesn’t have one. She isn’t constipated and has no issues as we took her to the doctor. Like PP i am fed up of having to take multiple outfits out and spare pairs of knickers out so i have put her back in nappies. She doesn’t like wearing them but I offer her the toilet every nappy change and tell her she doesn’t have to wear them if she uses the toilet and we are yet to have a toilet. Nursery have also advised going back to nappies. Hopefully it’s something she grows out of soon.

3out Sun 17-Feb-19 18:20:42

The HV recommended putting the nappy under the toilet seat, strung across and clamped down by the seat. Worth a try?

Have you tried Dr Ranj’s Poop Song?

Also, if you have Alexa, ask her for the poop song (it’s not the same as Dr R’s) and explains that you don’t need to be afraid of the splash etc

sarah1752 Sun 17-Feb-19 18:24:08

No I haven’t heard of that, we are going to try cutting a whole in the nappy saw it on another thread and I think that it may work.

201418 Sun 17-Feb-19 18:52:14

Thank you, will try a few things see how we get on. Really feeling fed up with things but he’s still learning.

OP’s posts: |
justasking111 Sun 17-Feb-19 18:54:58

This has been a winner in our house and friends.

seastargirl Sun 17-Feb-19 18:58:13

We used the poo goes to pooland app which helped quite a bit.

201418 Sun 17-Feb-19 19:02:44

Just tried dr ranj’s poop song, wasn’t interested 😔

OP’s posts: |
JassyRadlett Sun 17-Feb-19 19:02:58

We had this for nearly a year. My eldest was terrified of pooing on the toilet or potty. (He saved it for 11.30pm every night).

It was bloody hard work. First we just left it for a few months to get over the pressure and angst (and changed the dirty nappy of a sleeping child every bloody night.) Then we really went to work on what the barriers were. Toilet obviously not an issue, but it turned out he was terrified of the splash a poo would make. So we strung up a ‘poo catcher’ made out of loo roll under his kiddie toilet seat. Lots and lots of rewards for sitting on the loo after his wee was done. An AMAZING present at the top of the airing cupboard that he got to see every night and he knew was his ‘poo prize’. Lots of Poo goes to Pooland. And finally one night when I was 8 months pregnant we had had enough and sat there for nearly a bloody hour until he finally gave in.

DS2 is now 3 and I was dreading toilet training. He was adamantly against it at first but a week in was poo trained as well as wee trained. It’s a dream. We did nothing different. Just my eldest’s weird phobia.

201418 Sun 17-Feb-19 19:07:14

Downloaded the app🤞 Infant potty looks good, might look into it.

OP’s posts: |
ohmywhattodo Sun 17-Feb-19 19:12:50

This happened to us...with our 7th child so it wasn’t like we weren’t experienced in toilet training!!! Anyway he hit almost 5 and just started doing them in the toilet of his own accord. No bribing, singing songs, charts or whatever had worked so we had given up to faith that he would eventually do them in there! And he did!! He can get in a bit of mess still if he’s constipated (happens often if he doesn’t eat enough fibre) or loose (again happens reasonably often) but he always uses the toilet now. Good luck!

ohmywhattodo Sun 17-Feb-19 19:14:27

Should add he was 5 at the end of November so it’s still reasonably early days in terms of wiping effectively etc but the main thing for us is that he’s happy and willing to doing poo in the toilet and knows when he needs to!

gubbsywubbsy Sun 17-Feb-19 19:14:37

My son has special needs and he was like this , it went on for years but I have cracked it now he is 7. I had the incontinence nurse help me but basically we let him poo in the nappy but all pooing was done in the toilet room itself , we then progressed to sitting on the loo in the nappy . He had complete control but was afraid of the pop dropping away from his body .
Always empty the nappy down the loo and say goodbye to it etc
We did this for a good few years but eventually he just decided he was ready to poo normally .. as I said he has sn but this worked for us ..

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