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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Potty training

Potty training upset 3 year old

59 replies

SnowWhite26 · 07/11/2018 22:41

Mt 3 yr old asked to go in knickers and has done a few tiny wees on potty and gets a sticker. Tonight she hadnt gone for a big wee all day so was obviously uncomfortable. Put nappy on at night like normal and have just had her inconsably crying about needeing the potty. I got her up and changed her nappy which was soaking. Shes settled for now. Shall we give up with training for now? Shes obviously starting to understand what a wet nappy feels like but dont want her to be traumatized! Any ideas? X

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SnowWhite26 · 07/11/2018 22:42

Only been in knickers at home for 2 days. Pull ups if we go out. She has had a wee and poo accident but both times was asking for potty

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Monstersunderthebed · 07/11/2018 22:45

Persevere and give be praise

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Monstersunderthebed · 07/11/2018 22:46

How long have you been potty training for

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TokyoSushi · 07/11/2018 22:51

If it's only been 2 days I'd keep going a bit longer

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SnowWhite26 · 08/11/2018 03:12

Thabks for Ur replies.i no its only 2 days but for her to wake up so upset and almost traumatized coz of a wet nappy is very weird. I think its coz shes holding it and not relaxing and getting it all out.Knickers in and pull ups when we go out and take potty? Just until her confidence comes or knickers all the way? X

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Monstersunderthebed · 08/11/2018 18:04

Knickers all the way.shes 3 no more nappies

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munchbunch12 · 08/11/2018 20:47

I agree, knickers all the way. Take spare clothes and a potty with you when you go out. Only use pull ups or nappies at night or on a long journey where you might not be able to stop and get the potty out quickly!

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Shapecutter · 08/11/2018 20:49

Sounds like she's not ready if she's holding it all day. I'd take the pressure off and try again in a few weeks.

Toilet training is easy when the child is actually ready.

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Monstersunderthebed · 08/11/2018 21:04

She is 3. She should be toilet trained. No need for a potty. She is 3 years old!!

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Cherries101 · 08/11/2018 21:06

She’s 3. To be honest I wouldn’t have put her back in nappies. If she soaks her pants then change them.

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SingingSands · 08/11/2018 21:21

Ditch the potty. Bring her into the loo and let her use the toilet. Let her wear knickers and if she has an accident just change her, no fuss, no big deal.

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SnowWhite26 · 08/11/2018 21:21

I work in a pre school so get the whole shes 3 thing but now i am actually doing it with my child i realise its not that easy lol. Today she wanted knickers on aftervall of the upset last night but refused to use the potty. We went out abd she wanted to keep knickers on. Eventually i put her on potty and she did a small wee then held on again for about 3 hours wheb she looked so uncomfortable and worried but nothing came out on potty that i put her in a pull up.I dont no what to do. Shes so switched on and overthinking it all i think.i dont mind accidents i just dont want her to hold it in!

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Monstersunderthebed · 08/11/2018 22:59

It’s easier if you start before they are 2. From what I hear it’s harder if you leave it too long

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Ozgirl75 · 09/11/2018 03:30

If they haven’t done a big wee all day you need to be pleasant but firm “we’re going to sit on the loo now before bed/bath/dinner - and I’ll hold your hand while you do your wee”. Also make sure she is drinking lots of water so she gets lots of chances to practise understanding the feeling, holding it and releasing at the right time.

A bit of upset is ok - you can reassure her that she’s doing well. I’d only go back to nappies if she was constantly wetting with no understanding that she needed to go.

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SnowWhite26 · 09/11/2018 20:29

I dont no she wore knickers for 4 hours this morning and went to the toliet several times with no wee. Then got very uncomfortable looking and upset and said she wanted her nappy on. I took her to the bathroom and tried to get her on the toliet or potty but she got very very upset. When her nappy was on she looked worried for a bit then asked to sit on my lap where she did a masive wee that leaked through nappy onto me. I no ppl say she needs to get used to it which i agree but shes holding it so much coz shes had accidents and obviously Hates them. I feel i cant force a crying child onto the toliet x

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Monstersunderthebed · 09/11/2018 20:53

she’s too old to be wearing nappies so persevere you should

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SnowWhite26 · 09/11/2018 21:49

Monsterunderthebed. She is just 3 and very bright so it has suprized me as had several attempts.Saying this wiuld you force ur child crying and beging you to put a nappy on onto the potty? Even if i had she would of been so upset she def wouldn't of gone. I cant force her.

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Ozgirl75 · 09/11/2018 21:50

This is the time to be breezy and matter of fact “you’re a big girl and you know when to go to the toilet, we’re all out of nappies now” and then praise her when she sits on the loo and goes. Sit with her, get her to sing a song (we used “let it go” from frozen Grin )

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Ozgirl75 · 09/11/2018 21:52

Does she understand the whole process? I talked both of mine through the “when you feel pressure here that’s your body telling you that you need a wee, so when you feel that, head to the bathroom, sit on the toilet and then relax, sit for a few minutes until the wee comes out. Etc etc

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Monstersunderthebed · 09/11/2018 22:01

Is there any reason you have left it so late. Have you given up before?

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SnowWhite26 · 09/11/2018 22:02

Hi. Yeah i have explained it to her. She wants knickers but is obviously so unrelaxed she hold on and then knows the feeling as she wants a nappy. She was so upset earlier when i tried to put her on the loo. I dont want to put her off shes so stubborn .She has had accidents which i was jyst very relaxed with but she's obviously worried about having them again. I have ordered a toliet padded seat so will use that not the potty i think start a fresh. I guess its good in away shes holding it as is getting to know the feeling but difficult to get her to release it on the potty

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SnowWhite26 · 09/11/2018 22:02

Or toliet

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SnowWhite26 · 09/11/2018 22:22

I have a 10 week old so attempted in the summer when preggars but she really didnt get it.In the last few weeks shes talks about the process loads and now wants to wear knickers etc its just the confidence to do it on the toliet abd she gets so upset and uncomfortable holding it in x

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Move2WY · 09/11/2018 22:25

Stop completely with the pullups. Night time only. Take a potty when you go out and keep asking if ahe needs to go (onvs take change of clothes too).

She will get it.

Also, people saying shes three and should be toilet trained are unhelpful idiots quite frankly. Every child is different. And its not easier before 2 - its actually a longer process - by 3 they fully understand and within a week should get it.

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Move2WY · 09/11/2018 22:29

Oh, OP I also want to add (after reading a couple more comments) that you haven’t left it so late - please ignore those people who are asking that pointless question. I understand completely hkw hard it is with a new born and you don’t have to explain yourself, you’ve come looking for advice from us and you’ve encountered a few judgy types.

Follow the advice here but ignore those trying to give you a hard time about it. Its perfectly fine to be 3 and not toklet trained.

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