Advice 're potty - 2.8 DD

[Tinks15]

DD has been showing signs for a while that she might be ready for the potty, so we tried in January but we didn't have much success so now we're trying again however she is still holding her wee & worried about going for a wee in the potty. She holds her wee for hours & you can very clearly see she is desperate to go.
She tells us she needs to go then once on the potty it's like she bottles up & is scared of going. Is this something we should persist with & keep encouraging etc or do we leave it as she might not be ready mentally?

[tomhazard]

I am toilet training DS (DC3) who is exactly the same age. We are 1 week in and he was similar to your DD and was a bit fearful of the potty until yesterday and now he's fine about it. (Still working on Poos!) It's called training for a reason- they need encouragement and help they don't just know how to do it. If she can hold her wee in and knows it's coming then she is ready, you just need to keep encouraging her and she will get there

[Tinks15]

Thanks - we're going to keep at it. Shes dying to go this morning but no sign yet. It amazes me how long she can hold her wee for . She definitely needs a poo too but I can't imagine her being brave enough to do that yet.

[happymumof4crazykids]

Reward chart and promises of treats! Toddlers love stickers and mine enjoyed being able to put their own stickers on the chart after using the potty. We also used this approach for the toilet :)

[Tinks15]

We tried this last time & this time she's not interested what so ever!

[tomhazard]

What happens when she does finally go? Is it in her pants or will she go on potty last minute?
I've bribed all of mine with chocolate buttons tbh they soon forget once it becomes second nature!!

[Tinks15]

She usually holds it so long a little trickle comes out (bottom half naked) then we quickly grab the potty sit her on it then there is no stopping her as she's so bursting to go.
She did manage a wee about an hour ago though, i just sat her on it agreed to put frozen on then she just started going. She looked at me in amazement watching it coming out - bless her.

[Pattylogic]

I think it’s a case of getting her on the potty when you can she needs to go, perhaps distracting her by putting a dvd on/read a book/do some stickers etc and hopefully she’ll go. In time she’ll realise it’s nothing to worry about. Oh and plenty of bribes and rewards!

Lining the potty with a nappy might help too.

[tomhazard]

That's all good def keep going. Some time very soon she will just realise it's not scary and will go- she has all the skills in place physically.

[Tinks15]

So DD has come along leaps & bounds with weeing her potty, she is now starting to tell me when she needs to go & 9/10 she actually goes. Horaay! One accident so far thats it. Fingers crossed she has got the knack of it & there is no going back .

Silly question now, she hasn't been to poo for 2 days & I realise this is a massive step but do you think it will take her a while to be able to do this on the potty? Or any advice to encourage her more.

[tomhazard]

Hi op, poos can take longer and you might find she holds it in a bit- lots of children find the poo thing a bit hard to process!
Just keep encouraging her, don't get annoyed if she goes in her knickers and offer rewards. My DS is okay about poo but my middle DD was a complete nightmare she would hold it in for ages until she was hopping around. It was annoying but it passed. Keep at it!

[Tinks15]

Thanks for replying tomhazard. Just thought I'd give another update really DD is still holding poos in . She is clearly desperate to go but just wont go in the potty/toilet. Tried offering rewards etc doesn't appear to be interested. Been a couple of occasions where she literally can't hold it any longer so I quickly whip out the potty & get her on there in time & she will manage a little bit, I make a huge deal telling her what a big girl she is/give her a small reward then next day she just seems to go back to beig scared all over again. I've even tried lining the potty with a nappy but that doesn't make a difference.
I really don't want to have to resort to putting a nappy on her for her to do a poo but at the same time I don't want her holding it in & causing her discomfort. Anymore advice you can give?

[43percentburnt]

Apparently it can be odd for them sitting down to poo as they are used to standing up.

Poo in nappy stood next to toilet, flush it away and say next time you will manage. Sit on toilet in nappy. Cut hole in nappy.

Or chocolate button bribery may work.

One of ours struggled with this. Dh overcame the problem, I will ask him exactly what he did.

[43percentburnt]

Do you use one of them seats that make the toilet smaller? Is she scared of falling in?

I did read blow up a balloon on the toilet.

[43percentburnt]

Sorry posted too early, blowing up a balloon uses the same muscles apparently. Didn’t work for mine however!

[Tinks15]

Thanks 43 - let me know what your DH says.
Yes we have one of those toilet seats that sit on the loo. This ballon idea sounds different, will give that be try & see what happens.
The thing is DD always use to hide under the table sitting down to do her poo in her nappy so I didn't think it would make much difference sitting on the potty but maybe it's the sensation of the poo 'falling out'.

[tomhazard]

No advice op as DS is the same - wee in the potty okay but knows when poo is coming, dances around for a bit denying it then goes in his pants ....I'm not sure what to do about it but I do know that DD did the same and it passed!