3.5 year old ds bed wetting at night

[LittleBirdBlues]

Hi all, looking for some advise on how to approach this (or whether to just let it be).

DS is 3.5 and has been potty trained during the day since 2.5 about 2 months ago (or more) we took off his pull ups in the night because it was extremely hot and he was sweating badly at night. He was doing great with only very occasional accidents (every two weeks or so) until recently. The last five nights he has had accidents around 4am.

We take him for a sleep wee around 11pm just before we go to sleep, and he always does a wee then.

Any ideas what could be causing the accidents? He isn't drinking anything just before bedtime.

Shall I put him back in pull ups? He really doesn't want to wear them anymore.

If not, what else could I do?

Thanks for any advise or opinions!

P.S I realise accidents at that age are completely normal, and we never tell him off for them of course. I am just surprised about the sudden change, and it is getting a bit annoying changing the sheets every night, and I am running out of drying space with all the rain recently...

[LittleBirdBlues]

Apologies for the punctuation fail. I mean he has been potty trained since he was 2.5 during the day. And we took off pull ups at night about two months ago.

[insancerre]

Dryness at night cannot be trained for in the same way as day time dryness
It's entirely down to a hormone and muscle development
The dry nights were probably just coincidence
Just put nappies on for bed
Lifting is not recommended
It's normal for some children to be still in nappies at night until 5 or 6 and medical intervention is not recommended until at least 7

[Logoplanter]

Second the advice by insancerre

[mintbiscuit]

Exactly as insancerre says. Relax and use nappies/pull ups. Totally normal.

[gybegirl]

My DD2 was dry during the day quite early but was still in nappies when she went to school. She stopped needing them about 5. Freaked me out for a bit, but once I'd stopped fretting and left her in pullups she eventually just naturally became dry herself. I've no idea why your DS might have changed but try not to be to worried. I'd say pullups and save on the washing!!!

[Liz38]

My dd was dry in the day at 2.5 and not at night till around 4. I'd go back to nappies or pull ups and wait a while. Some are ready earlier than others, i wouldn't worry about it too much. Easier said than done!

[LittleBirdBlues]

Thanks all, sounds pretty unanimous! He's asleep without a pull up now but if there's another accident tonight we will just go back to nappies I guess. Not worth the stress for us or him...

insancerre that's interesting! Why isn't lifting recommended? I'm curious. Does it create bad habits or...?

[Alpacaandgo]

He is still very young so just stick with the pull ups for now. Lifting isn't recommended. Try and increase his fluid intake during the day as this apparently trains the bladder to hold on to more, but at 3.5 really don't worry.

If he's still wetting at age 7 (which is really not uncommon) you could try a bed wetting alarm. Where I live children should be over 10 before medical intervention is looked into.

[insancerre]

Lifting is just not necessary as it has no benefit whatsoever

[Alpacaandgo]

Lifting isn't recommended because it isn't teaching the brain to wake you up when you need a wee. Instead it is waking the child up for them to wee before the brain realises, which confuses the brain. Or something like that!

[LittleBirdBlues]

Thanks alpaca, that makes sense...

[User2938mcd]

Agree completely with other posters. We tried no pull ups with my DD for a few months at 4 years old and she just wasn't ready at all but then at 4.5 years it's all clicked into place. She was trained in the day from 2.5 years. I changed nothing at all except just waited a few more months. Definitely no lifting for a wee, it helps nothing in the long run x

[UnaPalomaBlanca]

Yes to Insancerre.
Dryness overnight is not something that can be trained. It happens when the body is ready

[thatorchidmoment]

Agree with PPs. Also, look into getting a peepod mat, which is a brilliant waterproof towel you can put in the bed that I bought for my DS who had a delay between daytime and nighttime dryness. It can be washed and tumbled and saved me washing so many sheets and mattress protectors, and scrubbing and airing damp mattresses!

[llangennith]

As others said, nighttime dryness just happens, you can't train it.
We use waterproof mattress protectors and disposable Pampers bedmats. Plus pull-ups. 9 yo DGS produces a lot of urine at night

[LittleBirdBlues]

Thanks all, really appreciate the good suggestions.

[CronnyRash]

Lifting isn't recommended anymore because it was found that rather than stopping night wetting it's actually more likely to be teaching the child to wee while not fully awake.

[ulmiedzaavquane]

I'm not disagreeing with the above - night dryness really can't be trained for and lifting for a sleep wee is counterproductive. However I am not sure that going back to pullups is the right decision.

We didn't seek medical help for night wetting till age 7 and we were told that (i) actually it isn't true that they won't help till age 7. The rules are different in each NHS trust but in ours it is any age so long as the child is self-motivated to want to be dry. (ii) it is entirely possible that our keeping him in pullups for an extended time waiting for evidence that he was ready might have contributed to him not developing the right reflex (this was communicated so kindly and tactfully that I may have misunderstood) but basically having pullups reinforces the message that dryness at night is not required and there is no need to wake up for a wee - so also counterproductive.

If I had the opportunity over again, and my advice to you op would be, that it is better not to use pull ups now that he has some control and to work on building and increasing that control - he is clearly doing pretty well staying dry till 4am (whereas ours would have been wet three times by then at that age) so the vasopressin hormone clearly is present to some extent.

One thing you can do is work on bladder capacity. How much liquid us he drinking during the day? I don't know whether it is less for a 3.5yo but for a 7yo it is supposed to be 1.5-2 litres - to be mainly water and milk with minimal squash, juice or tea which are all bladder irritants, and to be mainly drunk in the morning with less drinking after 3pm. Increasing the liquid intake and training him in the day to hold on to his wees for a bit longer and a bit longer with a view to being able to do a really really big wee if you can wait a bit longer for it when awake, may be all your DS needs to push that 4am wee a bit later until it doesn't start coming until it is waking up time anyway.

[LittleBirdBlues]

ulmied wow, thank you. That is excellent advise and a lot of food for though. Last night he managed to stay dry until the morning, so he clearly can manage this (sometimes).

To be honest, I have no idea how much he drinks during the day. It is only water or herbal twas, with a cup of milk some days but not most. He does it a lot of fruit and veg as well, which I guess contributes to fluid intake.

I will try and keep an eye on how much he is drinking and try and encourage him to drink more before the afternoon.

Thanks again.