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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Potty training

5 year old still wet at night? Advice?

30 replies

MissCookiee · 24/05/2017 20:59

My 5 year old DS started school in September. He's been potty trained since the age of 3 but he's still in pull-ups at night and if he doesn't wear one he just wets the bed. My 3 year old DD has been trained since she was 2 and she has been dry both day and night ever since. How can I get my DS to be dry at night? I've tried limiting his drinks after a certain time before bed, and I've tried waking him for a wee too and still no luck. I praise him on the times when he does wake up dry. Can this be normal at his age?

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BretonTop · 24/05/2017 21:04

Yes, I think it is norma, it's just not talked about. I know of a few children in Year 1 (so age 5 or 6) who still have a pull-up at night because they're super deep sleepers. One of the Mums said "my little girl has enough to worry about now; making friends, school and home-work etc, when she wets the bed she gets really upset. It's one stress I can take away from her. She'll get there eventually" which I thought was brilliant.

My ds1 was potty trained at 2.5, dry at night by age 3. Ds2 not potty trained until he was 3.3, and is now 3.5 and nowhere near ready to start doing dry nights.

Try not to worry.

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MissCookiee · 24/05/2017 21:06

I feel a lot better now. I did read somewhere that boys can sometimes take longer than girls but I'm not sure how accurate that is

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SpikeWithoutASoul · 24/05/2017 21:07

My DD is also 5 and still wet at night. Just wees when she's fast asleep. I know she has no control of it, as in all other ways she's very into 'being a big girl'. We just put her in pull ups and don't make a big deal. Hours and hours of internet research tells me that it's a chemical/hormonal thing and she'll grow out of it.

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FATEdestiny · 24/05/2017 21:08

All three of mine were in school before they were dry at night. Around 5-6 years old.

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VocalCat · 24/05/2017 21:09

I agree that it is a hormone thing and they get there in their own time, even if it feels frustrating and as if all the other children are already able to do so.

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TiddlesUpATree · 24/05/2017 21:10

My DS is 5 and still wet. We tried 4 weeks of no pull ups recently on advice of school nurse. The idea was to let him get wet. He was supposed to feel the wet and eventually trigger something to make him recognise he needed to go. In the 4 weeks he didn't wake once, just slept in a puddle of pee. Confused

We have decided to leave it a few months before trying again. He's such a deep sleeper. There's no rush.

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BretonTop · 24/05/2017 21:12

Yes I've read it's a hormonal thing too, and there's nothing you can do about it.

I actually wish there was less stigma around it and parents talked about it more.

I'll be gently encouraging ds2 soon, but won't stress if it doesn't happen. With ds1 he was waking up in a dry pull-up and couldn't wait to get it off. Ds2's is still sopping so don't think he's ready.

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Sleeperandthespindle · 24/05/2017 21:12

My DS is almost 5 and still in pull ups at night. I tried a week of not, on advice of the school nurse, but he just wet the bed, requiring more changing and night time disturbance. I decided to let him stay in pull ups as long as he needs to - they don't have any control over it.

His daytime wetting, on the other hand, is more of a concern, although he freely admits it's because he doesn't want anyone else to get what he's playing with while he's at the loo. He'd rather be damp and smell of wee.

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minipie · 24/05/2017 21:14

My advice is worry about it when he's 7... I think GPs say up to 7 is normal

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Soupygirl · 24/05/2017 21:14

Totally normal, my Dd was a really deep sleeper and just didn't wake up. When she turned 6 she got fed up as she wanted to go to sleep overs (without pyjama pants). In the summer holidays we tried a potty training device that buzzed when she wet, she was dry within a couple of weeks - it trained her to wake up when she needed a wee. She basically sorted herself out, I couldn't be more proud of her. She still has the odd accident when really tired.

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MrsKCastle · 24/05/2017 21:17

My DD is almost 6 and still in pull-ups. We've tried letting her sleep without them but she just West the bed. I assume she'll get there in her own time.

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1981trouble · 24/05/2017 21:22

Yes it's normal. My 5 yo is struggling to be dry during the day never mind night so I've done lots and lots of reading and have been to an incontinence talk this week.

Basic summary:
Causes of bedwetting -
Not waking to bladder signals (can use an alarm eventually)
Lack of vasopressin (can take medication short term)
Twitchy bladder (medication short term)
Bladder too small (drink more)
Constipation (drink more)
UTI (see gp)
Anxiety (address as a standalone issue)

What you can do:
Read the Eric webpage as ideas for what you can do.
Don't make a fuss, praise
Reduce stress
Toilet before story and then again before night night
Dark room - helps release vasopressin
Look at drinking more during the day - this will increase the bladder size. At least 1 litre a day for 5 year old.
Medication from gp won't be given until everything else has been ruled out.

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BumpGoesBumpety · 24/05/2017 21:23

Official guidance is to: have no drinks an hour and a half before bed time; have an evening routine which includes emptying the bladder before bed; and lifting / encourage to the loo when you go to bed. Also making sure the path from bedroom to bathroom is easy to navigate (not climbing down from a bunk bed / no obstacles in the way) is worth considering too.

It's not unusual though and if they're still wet at age 8 a referral to a continence service would be recommended to investigate causes, provide extra guidance or look at assisted technology (alarms etc).

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EnglishGirlApproximately · 24/05/2017 21:26

Ds is 5 and dry if he's wearing a pull up, if we try without it he wets the bed. I'm guessing it's a comfort thing so I'm not pushing it, he obviously needs it. They're so kitty and have so much to take in at this age, he'll stop wearing it when he's ready.

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TrishanFlips · 24/05/2017 21:26

Quite normal. My DS was 7 before dry at night.

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Chocolateteabag · 25/05/2017 00:10

My 6.5 year old has only just come out of night time pull ups
Some just take longer to develop the hormone to get them through

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Chocolateteabag · 25/05/2017 00:13

He also has set backs if he gets too tired (sleepovers etc) so we just pack a pull up
They sell 8-15yr old pull ups in Tesco so must be a market out there
Wish people would be a bit more open about it tbh

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mammmamia · 25/05/2017 00:26

I have twins, a boy and girl. Both potty trained at same time. Boy dry at night by 3. Girl not until 6. Now 7 and not had a wet bed for a year.

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WiltingTulip · 25/05/2017 02:05

I have 4 dcs and only one was dry at nights before 5.
It's never concerned me.

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BuffyFan · 27/05/2017 22:13

My eldest is 5.6 and still in pull ups, I'm so relieved to see this thread. He toilet trained himself at 3.2.

I'm not pushing it with him, but it is so frustrating that on top of soaking a pull up by morning he's also often (at least once a week) wetting through to the bed as well. I'm fed up with the washing!

Recently we've been talking about sleep overs, that he can stay over at a friend's house once he's dry at night. I'm figuring if he's just not fussed about being wet, that will be an incentive for him to be dry, but if he's genuinely not ready physically/hormonally then the incentive won't make any difference. We'll see!

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LPLPLP · 27/05/2017 22:18

Make the bed doubling up so waterproof sheet, sheet, waterproof sheet, sheet. Then if there is an accident at night you just have to whip off the top 2 layers which makes it easier.

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Wolfiefan · 27/05/2017 22:20

It's hormonal. You can't praise him into being dry at night. You just have to wait until he produces the hormone.

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AppleAndBlackberry · 27/05/2017 22:40

My nearly 8 year old is only just out of pull ups and my 6 year old still wears them. It's fairly common, I know a lot of people where at least one of their children was wet until 7 or older.

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ImBrian · 02/06/2017 07:37

I have a 5 year old dd who is also still wet st night, we tried no nappies this week and she was dry for two nights (lifted at 10pm) but then wet every night since. I have done this before though my 16 year old dd is still regularly wet after trying all of the alarms/drugs etc. The only thing that worked was a hypnotising cd which had her dry for months but now she refuses to use it and just accepts she'll be wet now and then! I'm really hoping I'm not about to go through it all again.

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RoganJosh · 02/06/2017 07:40

I think the latest advice is not to lift them as you go to bed Bump , as it encourages them to wee without actively deciding to.

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