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Any hope for resistant 3 year old?!

(13 Posts)
Longsuffering24 Sun 12-Feb-17 18:53:21

My DS was 3 in December and still isn't potty trained. I've read about waiting for the right signs, most include a willingness on their part, that's easy to say but when your child is the only one still in nappies at pre-school you start to wonder where you went wrong! I've tried all the usual things, books, charts, rewards but none make any difference. DS won't even sit on the potty without bribery and then will only occasionally do a wee on there if left long enough. I decided to put him in pants today just to see whether anything had changed since we last tried 6 months ago but it hadn't. 6 pairs of pants, trousers and socks later we still had nothing in the potty. I'm just wondering whether he's genuinely not ready or I should persevere further?
He seems to understand that wee and poo should go in the potty but either doesn't realise at the time or is just refusing to do it.

Rinoachicken Sun 19-Feb-17 17:53:53

Don't have anything to add, because I'm in EXACTLY the same situation with my 3 year old. He's just not interested!

Apfelbunny Sun 19-Feb-17 17:58:58

My 3 he old wasn't interested at all in the potty then one day suddenly announced they wanted grown up pants.
This was a fortnight ago and aside from a couple of accidents has been dry since day 3.

We'd kept the potty out for months prior to this and gave out chocolate and sweets if they say on the potty with no pants whether they did anything or not. They never did do anything until they had grown up pants on.

Kinder eggs are great bribery...

HeyRoly Sun 19-Feb-17 18:10:07

I've been there. Massively resistant three year old - would just withhold (wee and poo) as soon as the nappy came off, for eight hours or longer. It was really awful.

I gave up while I was pregnant with DC2 (severe SPD and restricted mobility) but eventually broke her iron will at 3.10 by getting angry. People say not to, but I'd tried everything and nothing worked. I tried acting like I didn't care whether she did a wee or held it in all day. I tried everything, but she was SO stubborn. I decided enough was enough and at the end of yet another day of withholding and refusing to wee, I got cross and told her that we were going to sit in the bloody bathroom until she did a wee. And she did. I doubt she fully emptied her bladder but it was a start.

Day two she tried the same nonsense and I got VERY firm again. After that she was fine. Well I say "fine"; using the toilet away from home was another immense psychological battle, but that's another story.

Dodowalk87 Sat 04-Mar-17 16:07:55

My nearly 3 year old daughter won't use the toilet or potty either. She's showing the signs that she's ready. But refuses to do anything in them. She has used the toilet and potty before and a couple of times hasn't needed any encouragement. But she seems to have reverted. I have tried to tell her that I don't have any nappies left and that she has to use either potty or toilet. But she holds it in and makes herself uncomfortable. She then has an accident and gets upset. I'm not mad at her having them I just want her out of nappies. If she doesn't need to use the toilet she will happily sit on either. It's only when she has to give something up she screams for a nappy on. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

astonvanilla Sat 04-Mar-17 16:13:47

Another one in the same situation....nice to know we're not the only ones!

PuffinsSitOnMuffins Tue 07-Mar-17 12:00:26

I was going to start a thread about my 3 year old, who's been sorted for wees for what, 9 months or something? But still in nappies (except at the childminder) because he WILL NOT poo in the toilet. He'll tell me he needs to poo, but insist that he has to do it standing up in his nappy. Sitting down on the toilet and wearing his nappy? Nope. And much screaming if I try and insist. Twice about six months ago he actually pooed in the toilet. But no joy since. He can control himself -as soon as we started potty training he stopped pooing at the childminder's, that's why he's in pants there. Bribery is useless. Aargh.

CharlotteL789 Tue 07-Mar-17 22:24:07

Hi I'm in a similar situation and ended up putting mine back in nappies. I known its sometimes frowned upon but its made things so much easier.

Millybingbong Thu 16-Mar-17 20:51:10

What happened after that Charlotte or are you still in the situation?

isadoradancing123 Thu 16-Mar-17 21:27:48

May sound odd, but I got a child toilet seat, and a small low step, (dunelm) and the added security of having feet secure rather than dangling, gave him the confidence to sit on toilet and poo !

CharlotteL789 Fri 17-Mar-17 09:45:19

We are still in the same situation but I'd rather wash nappies than the carpet and furniture. He might not like having a nappy on but till he cooperates he's going to have to put up with it.

Millybingbong Fri 17-Mar-17 14:17:34

Nappies wouldn't be a good plan here because she goes to school in September.

I am having considerable success with a reward chart today. Never had one before - so far 13 wees and one wet pants. Best bit is she is motivated to go to the loo.
I think that was the bit missing for her

ExplodedCloud Fri 17-Mar-17 14:24:42

Mine was an epic toileting avoider. Nursery pushed us into it and it was a complete nightmare which ended up with severe withholding, medication, tears all round and a return to nappies.
Second go at our pace was fine.

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