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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Potty training

So confused about whether I should continue

12 replies

HoggleHoggle · 28/07/2016 18:30

Ds is 2.7 and on day 6 of potty training. First 4 days were good, 1-2 accidents a day but mostly all wees were in the potty or toilet. Day 5 was actually a totally dry day, and we went out and about morning and afternoon. Great, I thought. But today has been a nightmare. 2 big accidents this morning even though he'd had a wee within the last 20 mins, and then another one just now even though he'd again had a wee 10 mins ago. What's going on? He hasn't been drinking excessively and isn't tired/ill.

In case it's relevant, he's not yet at the stage of telling me he needs a wee but I am putting him on the loo at least every hour (more if he seems to have drunk a lot in one go) and if I ask if he needs the loo, and he does, he quite happily goes off with me to the toilet. Other times he says no, so I leave it. So I thought he was recognising the sensation of needing a wee, and learning to hold one in, even if he wasn't proactively asking to go, if that makes sense.

Any advice?! I'd rather not abandon things as he was doing so well, but obviously don't want to waste all our time if it's best to give it a rest for a while.

One thing that has occurred to me is that he hasn't pooed today, though he's needed one, and I don't know if that can interfere with the bladder control? He isn't yet able to poo in the toilet (he does try bless him but I think is so used to doing it standing up), so up until now he was still pooing every day but in a nappy. But he hasn't today.

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CatsCantFlyFast · 28/07/2016 18:37

I don't think you should give up at day 6. He's been weeing when he wants, where he wants, without a thought, for nearly three years. It's going to take more than 6 days to unlearn that and learn new habits. Even as adults learning a new skill takes more than 6 days. Stay positive, keep going, it'll come in time, sounds as though he is doing brilliantly to me

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HoggleHoggle · 28/07/2016 18:46

Thanks not, I appreciate the advice. I'm second guessing myself lots at the moment...I'm actually very keen to continue with the training but am occasionally worried that I'm letting my own keenness cloud my judgement. So it's useful to hear this sort of thing is par for the course and the accidents today don't necessarily mean I'm forcing things.

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CatsCantFlyFast · 28/07/2016 19:45

Not at all - three weeks in and we still get the occasional accident - it's par for the course as kids are busy beings and their brains are processing a lot all the time!

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WorldsBiggestGrotbag · 28/07/2016 19:51

We're 2.5 weeks in, haven't had an accident for 2 weeks and then bam, she did a wee while sitting on my knee this afternoon! Persevere, it sounds like he's getting there.

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petalsandstars · 28/07/2016 19:54

Different opinion but I'd leave it for now (or try pull ups for a bit) and try pants again in a few weeks. Both mine have had one day of a few accidents then a couple of getting to the toilet but sometimes having a slight dribble in pants, then have been dry and made it to toilet in time after that. It may be he's just not quite ready.

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petalsandstars · 28/07/2016 19:55

Mine definitely knew and communicated "need a wee" even if it was just at vital wee point initially.

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HoggleHoggle · 28/07/2016 21:06

Thanks all. Useful feedback.

Petal how old were your dc when you trained? I'm trying to find the balance between not forcing before ds is ready but also being encouraging...ds is the sort of soul who I suspect will nearly always be too busy to think about doing wees so I'm guessing he will need me to take the lead for the first little while. Which I'm fine with doing, but obviously not if the poor thing isn't really capable in the first place. It's a difficult one.

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petalsandstars · 28/07/2016 21:14

Big one was 3.1 little one was 3.2 - I tried with DC2 a few weeks prior but there were so many accidents I didn't think they were ready so left it a bit longer. DC1 I waited until then as I didn't fancy potty training with a newborn! Asked DC2 one morning (as I had a few days off) "pants or pull up" thinking to try again and just went with it when the answer was pants.

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petalsandstars · 28/07/2016 21:15

Sticker charts were helpful for both of mine too.

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HoggleHoggle · 28/07/2016 21:22

Great, thank you. We're also doing a sticker chart and it definitely motivates him!

I think I will give it a few days to see whether today was a blip, but if the accidents continue to happen so soon after having a wee on the toilet then I will stop and try again later.

Wish us luck...

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NeedACleverNN · 28/07/2016 21:22

I would leave it tbh.

I have literally just trained Dd.

She is 3.4 and did it with 3 days. Not had an accident since. We used sticker charts

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HoggleHoggle · 30/07/2016 11:23

For anyone still reading, put ds in pants yesterday and he was an absolute trooper, no accidents all day! Also doing well today.

I think it is linked to poo. On the days he hasn't had his usual morning poo Grin he seems much less able to control his bladder. So I'll keep an eye on that and adjust when needed.

Thanks again for advice.

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