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Nothing but accidents! Help please

(3 Posts)
CornishYarg Fri 31-Oct-14 11:38:19

We're having a second attempt at potty training DS (3.1) after a failed effort in the summer. We previously tried for just over a week and he never managed to go in the potty (except when I caught him mid-wee and put him on the potty).

We're having another go now as he seemed interested in the idea of toilets etc. Pre-school commented on this too and suggested it might be worth another try. Day 2 today and it's just the same as before. He can hold his wee well, going a couple of hours at least between wees. He will sit on the potty reluctantly, but never goes and assures me he doesn't need to go/has finished etc. But a lot of accidents are within minutes of sitting on the potty. Also, all his accidents so far in this second attempt have been when I'm not in the room.

We've been referred to a paediatrician due to ASD concerns with DS and we're waiting for an appointment. DS isn't able to articulate any fears he might have about it all. He isn't great at asking for anything so I'm not at all sure he would tell me he needs to go. But I try not to ask him or get him to sit too often as it annoys him. He's extremely stubborn and won't do anything he doesn't want to!

I've asked him if he'd prefer to use the toilet or stand up to wee; response was a point blank upset refusal (did I mention he's stubborn?!). I've tried leaving the room when he's on the potty as he seems to want privacy. I've tried reading to him/giving him a toy to hold while he's on the potty to try to relax him as he looks tense. The only progress from last time that I've noticed is that he gets upset when he wets himself now. In the summer, I had him naked from the waist down and he didn't seem to care about wee running down his legs. Now he's in pants and trousers and doesn't like the wet feeling.

Any tips or similar experiences very welcome!

AppleYumYum Fri 31-Oct-14 11:55:09

We've just started too, ds 2.5 but not sure if he's ready. He wouldn't say I need to sit on the potty.

He'll happily do a wee on the potty but not poo, scared of that. Things that have worked are Pirate Pete's potty book that we got as it had good reviews on Amazon. He loves that book and it gets him excited about using the potty. Secondly I bought a reward chart and said if he did 7 wees in the potty we could go to Pizza Express (rarely go there and he loves those dough balls so a big lure!).

I get him to sit on there after a meal when I've deliberately given him extra water or milk to drink! Then wait for a wee to happen. Then jump up and down and make a big fuss and let him put another star on his reward chart. I usually end up letting him play a game on my phone or the tablet to keep him there, not sure that's right or wrong. I have also put a bit of plastic sheet down and put the potty in front of the tv which also worked.

I'm a bit unsure if it's going anywhere though, if I leave him with no pants on he just wees wherever he is and doesn't seem bothered so perhaps it's too soon? Hope someone wise comes along! confused

CornishYarg Fri 31-Oct-14 14:37:40

Thanks for your reply. We have the Pirate Pete book which he likes reading so maybe it will sink in soon. I haven't tried a reward chart yet as I'm not sure he would get it. But I do have a bag of treats (small toys, chocolate etc) if he does something in the potty but he doesn't seem bothered!

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