Help me please. I don't know what to do!

[Trazzletoes]

Hi, we started potty training DS last week (2.10) and everything with wees is going swimmingly. He's managed 2 poos in the potty in over a week and one of these is because I knew one was coming and had him sat on the potty for about 20 minutes watching Fireman Sam, so it was definitely not because he was expecting it.

I've dug 2 separate loads of poo out of the carpet this morning, and about half his big boy pants have had to go in the bin (he has stomach problems so poo tends to go, well, everywhere). I was asking him whether he knows before he poos or not, and he has told me that he doesn't know beforehand, it just comes and he can't stop it.

I had initially planned to wait a bit longer before potty training but HV told me I must do it as soon as he started showing signs and that I would cause problems for him later if I waited a couple of months... she isn't at work now until next week as I called her for some advice on this today.

I understand that it is better to persevere, but if he genuinely has no idea when he's pooing would it not be better to put him back in nappies for a few more months until he has a bit better physical control?

He also doesn't like to be dirty and is getting increasingly upset about being covered in poo several times a day.

Advice please, I really don't know what to do, and DH cleverly manages to absolve himself of all responsibility in such areas because, you know, I'm the Mum blah blah blah so no point in discussing with him.

[WanderingOkapi]

Just do what suits u. If u think he needs a nappy for poo then do it. It will only be for a while and you'll be into the next phase. I'm going a very gentle toilet training thing with ds (nearly 3) he can choose if he wants pants or nappy, toilet or potty. It's not stressful, process taking ages but I don't care about that. He had pooed on the floor once and in garden twice but there u go! They all get there in the end