DS only using potty with us and not at nursery!

[babybouncer]

We've been potty training for about a month or so and DS had been making really good progress. He always comes back from nursery with two or three bags of washing due to splashing, which was worrying me, but this week nursery says he's refusing to use the potty at all. Yesterday they got him to sit on the potty, he did nothing then pulled his trousers up and promptly weed. When I asked him where he weed at nursery he said 'all over' or 'in my pants'. He doesn't do anything like this at home - sits on potty morning and night to produce wees and once woke during the night asking to go on the potty before promptly going back to sleep - and he's entirely capable of holding a wee while we get to the potty.

He's in nursery full time and his key worker is lovely, but I worry she's not giving him any consequences for the accidents, so he doesn't bother using the potty. At home he knows that if he poos in his pants they usually get thrown away and I can't remember the last time he had an accident (except when we've been too slow!).

Is this normal? Will it just stop itself or do I need to speak to nursery about it? (DH has already told them that DS doesn't do this at home and he always has to do a wee on the potty when we pick him up as we live quite far away, so they have seen him do it).

[girlywhirly]

Is he using the nursery potties, do you think he might be better taking his own from home to use (or an identical one)?

[babybouncer]

That's the thing girlywhirly we take his in everyday, but he just seems to have decided that he's not going to do it at nursery and I feel like I don't know how to influence it when I'm not there. (I'm currently stuck at home in the final stages of pregnancy, so DH and various grandparents are doing all the nursery runs, so it feels completely out of my control).

[girlywhirly]

Perhaps that is the heart of the matter. He is worried about you because you are not doing the nursery run as usual. I guess he is fine on the potty at home because he is there with you. He knows that something momentous is going to happen soon (the new baby) and don't be surprised if his training goes out of the window. He perhaps feels that where he will or will not wee is the last element of control he has over the changes in his life, and that will also be why nursery are being lenient at the moment.

[babybouncer]

Thanks girlywhirly, you make a good point. He did do better today - used the potty at least twice and came home in the same trousers (but not pants) that he went in wearing!
I should probably relax more and see if I can give him something else he has more control over.