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So anxious at how this is unfolding... pls help!

(5 Posts)
oinkyoink Thu 13-Oct-11 22:29:54

My dd trained last week at 27 months, she got it quickly and seemed really pleased. She started off doing wees and her poo would come when she had the nappy on for a nap.
She then did two poos in the potty two days in a row on Sunday and Monday. Yesterday she started looking really anxious around 3pm and this went on until 7pm, there was a poo trying to come out but she wouldnt let it, she seemed really terrified at the prospect she was in the process of doing a poo. Eventually I said let's put on a nappy, she let me and about half an hour later, while crying uncontrollably she did a poo. She seemed to feel she was failing doing it in the nappy, she was so upset. We told her we were really happy she had done her poo and that it was ok to do it in the nappy. POor thing was distraught. Then during the night even though she had a nappy on she woke up calling me twice to do a wee wee. I sat her on the potty both times and she did wee. It's like she is hyper aware of going on the potty and no where else coupled with a fear of pooing now. I feel so bad for her. It started so well and has now turned into this. Today she has not pooed (even though there were lots of anxious moments were I knew sh ewas desperately holding a poo in) at all but had two wee wee accidents which I think are down to confusing with poos coming and trying to hold them in but then they come out........

It's really upsetting me to see this. What should I do? Any advice would be great. sad

MrsVidic Fri 14-Oct-11 14:22:39

firstly I found that when my dd started to get upset by accidents she had really 'got it' iyswim
I think you should drop the nappy in the day time- even for the nap as this confuses her.
Try routinley sitting her on a potty at poo time and let her watch her fave show / give her a book.
We always talk about the size of poo and what animal would have made it grin This takes her mind off wanting her to go back and keep playing.
When she trumps, and you know she needs one, you can ask her if she thinks she would like to try for one now or save it until..... (ie until the end of this tv show, until we have finished colouring- so she doesnt have the option of no its just not now)
The worst thing you can do ime is ask constantly- this makes you both miserable. Try to tell yourself youll ask every 30 mins max when she needs one.
Plus exersize can bring a poo on fast- I know this myself from running so it must be the same for them, take a potty to the park etc.

oinkyoink Fri 14-Oct-11 15:08:10

thanks for the advice, i just need someone to talk to as i am so stressed out watching her when the time comes for pooing, she bends down, wriggles about and when i say shall we sit on the potty she says no no no no... so i leave her, it goes away then 15 mins later she's wriggling again...
we went to the park this morning and she did lots of running about, came home and more wriggling etc but only a wee..... i can't believe pooing is becoming such a phobia at her age!!!!! i will try asking if she wants to do it now or after the tv show and see does it help
yesterday i drew pictures of poos with smiley faces and said one was mine, one was hers and the other her friend's to help her see they aren't evil
i have given her some laxative to help ease it out so its not painful and then a vicious circle of being afraid to go becuase of pain
thanks again

MrsVidic Fri 14-Oct-11 18:32:32

it is so fustrating and upsetting- which is why I found it hard. It was not until I 'let it go' that we had sucsess iyswim

TheSkiingGardener Fri 14-Oct-11 18:37:29

Have you seen this thread?

Happy to send you a copy if you pm me. Helps make it fun!

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