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Preschool potty training etiquette

(11 Posts)
DitaVonCheese Wed 07-Sep-11 21:57:27

Evening ladies. Am currently potty training nearly 3 yo DD. It is going relatively well at home - 95% of pees in potty, only poos so far have been in the garden/pants/bath hmm - but she is adamant she doesn't want to wear nappies any more and I think she is ready.

She's at preschool two mornings a week. I sent her off on Tuesday, approx day 3 of PT, with a bag full of spare pants/clothes just in case, and picked her up with a bag full of wet clothes. She didn't pee in the loo once while she was there, despite being asked if she needed to go.

Not sure whether this is a blip or a bit of a problem but she has so far only peed in the potty in our own house and granny's house - has refused to go to the loo while out and about (shows willing but then gets there and can't). Think preschool might be same issue though obviously she knows it well (been there about a year).

Anyway, my question is: is it acceptable to leave a partially trained child in someone else's care? When I left her on Tuesday I explained that we were PT and she was doing well at home but I was more apprehensive when out and about and expected to get a soothing reply but they didn't seem as accepting as I thought they would be (possibly being paranoid). Now concerned I have committed a terrible faux pas. She's due to go back tomorrow - do I force her back into a nappy for the morning? I fear the Code Brown. Help!

(She also peed in the potty immediately after leaving preschool, sitting on the pavement by my car - not sure whether this is acceptable either. It's a minefield I tell you.)

ChippingIn Wed 07-Sep-11 21:58:51

Have they been offering her the option of a potty?

ChippingIn Wed 07-Sep-11 21:59:14

Would you be upset if they just took her to the toilet and popped her on it?

DitaVonCheese Wed 07-Sep-11 22:02:01

I don't know re potty, was going to ask tomorrow. Was also going to take some Peppa stickers in for rewards.

She does pee on the loo at home (though potty is easier) so I don't think it's a loo v potty thing as such, just the unfamiliarity. They do have those little loos at school so they should be fairly easy, though might check she actually knows where they are!

Wouldn't mind them just sticking her on the loo, feel terrible they have to wipe up so many puddles (one was on the slide, think DD quite likes that blush)

SusiaX Mon 12-Sep-11 09:55:48

I don't have much advice but lots of sympathy. My DD is exactly the same, she's perfect at home and when we're out now (we're about a month in) but started pre-school last week and has one or two accidents every time she's there. They ask her if she needs to go but she always says no. It might be because she's in a new situation (which I know isn't the case for your DD) or someone suggested maybe it's shyness/not wanting to ask which may be the case for us as she's used to going with me for the majority of the time.

Luckily, my preschool seems a lot more sympathetic and are more than happy to deal with accidents although they don't have potties, the children have to use the little toilets (or not in my DD's case!).

mousymouse Mon 12-Sep-11 10:00:43

talk to them. they will have been through similar with lots and lots of other children.

RachelPross Mon 12-Sep-11 15:51:51

Am in a v similar position but we have been PT for 6 mths!! DD is 3 and 1/2 yrs old and started FT school last monday. potty is not an option there and she is in a class of 30 plus children.
She was v late walking (23 months because she has double jointed knees apparently) so I put off PT till later than we did it with DD1 (started at age 2). She was in PT nursery till July (3 hrs a day/ 4 mornings a week) and we oinly had one bag of wet clothes from her there, although we were still having plenty of accidents at home. I dont think we have ever had a full day without her having an accident since we took her out of nappies.
Since she started FT school of course it is now someone else's problem too and I am worried they might tell us to keep gher home till its sorted out. sad
Last week the best we managed was one pair of wet knickers in a day, the worst was 4 sopping wet sets of at my wits end.
Called HV today and she is going to come out and see me but can't see what else I can do. Haven't done anything differently to what I did with DD1 and she is fine.

milkysmum Mon 12-Sep-11 16:02:39

My DD is 2 1/2 and I think (fingers crossed) we have got through the potty training. She is in nursery and they were very much part of the whole process and gave me loads of advice and were more than happy to have my dd with no nappies when she started training- you need to be consistant in what is done at home and nursery. They had plenty of potties and would encourage her to go regularly and used stickers as a reward when she went (as I was doing at home). Yes at first I would pick her up and have loads of wet clothes but i don't really think this should be a problem for them- it's part and parcel of childcare surely!

Deux Mon 12-Sep-11 16:10:43

I wonder if they might be better just taking her to the loo. Ime, there can be little point in asking a 3yo if they need to go as they invariable say no.

I think she should be taken there at regular intervals. At DDs nursery they have set toilet times through the morning which seems to work.

Deux Mon 12-Sep-11 16:12:50

I also meant to add that they should be supporting you in this as your DD won't be the first or last to be in a similar situation.

DitaVonCheese Mon 12-Sep-11 21:30:10

Thanks ladies smile I think it's part shyness, part just being busy playing. Anyway, second pant-free day at school went much better - she still came out and immediately did a pee on the potty on the pavement next to the car blush and only did one piddle at school, but it was at least in the loo and she came out in the same clothes she went in in grin Will see how it goes tomorrow.

Next question is do I need to teach her to wipe in case of in-school poops, and how do I do this?! I would rather I just kept doing it until she's bigger as suspect she'll be rubbish at it for a while yet (excitement at her first in the loo poo, which she did while we were still in bed, was slightly sullied by our equally slightly sullied sheets when she got into bed with us afterwards ...).

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