Post-natal anxiety and OCD

[Pndmummy1]

Hello lovely mummies,
New to MN and just looking for a bit of support or empathy. I’ve given birth to a gorgeous baby girl (FTM) and been wrecked with anxiety and OCD (intrusive thoughts of baby being harmed, being taken away, magical thinking) for several months now. I had some anxiety during pregnancy (suffered several losses before DD was born) but nothing like this-constantly worries DD will get a disease or die. She has got eczema and CMPA and I’m always washing my hands and making DP wash his hands before touching her, taking off shoes, etc. We’ve also got two kitties and are worried she might be allergic so I’m constantly washing throws and clothing that have hair on them. I also suffered a bereavement when I was pregnant (friend’s daughter was stillborn one week before our DD was born) and can’t stop thinking about them either.
I’ve been enroled in CBT and it helps if only to make
Me realise how much I’ve been worrying and obsessed, if that makes any sense? But it feels I’m so far from not worrying g and obsessing and DP also feels I’m judging him (as I’m constantly
So worried he feels I think he’s putting DD at risk...which I suppose is somewhat true but only because of the OCD, and I feel the same about myself, IYSWIM)

When I have had anxiety in the past, mindfulness has helped, but was told by current couselor not to do that as it allows me to avoid the obsessive thoughts.

I’d just like to know if anyone else has experience of this and what has helped. And when or if it finally got better? Feel I’m in a prison in my mind and it’s impactinf my relationship with DP and DD. DD is EBF and I don’t want to take any medications, but would be open to that once she’s no longer Bf.

Thank you Xx