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PND and PNA Support Thread

(11 Posts)
Tweedledee3Tweedledum Sat 25-Mar-17 18:38:33

I have recently been diagnosed by my GP as having postnatal depression and anxiety. My child is now 14 months. It has taken some time for me to be honest about how I am feeling, and I can't help but think that other people will think I am lying or something to get more time off work, because why would it take 14 months to get this diagnosis?

I guess that's all part of the problem. I am troubled daily with intrusive thoughts, racing thoughts, apathy and immense feelings of fear and guilt.

I am currently prescribed sertraline 100mg. I am on week 4 now. The panic has settled, but all other symptoms persist.

I wanted to start a support thread as I feel so alone. I feel my mum friends that I have known since my child was weeks old, couldn't possibly believe that happy, confident mum could have PND. How do I tell them?

Welcome, one and all. Please share what you feel you need to and let's help support one another through this.

flowers

Purpleprickles Sat 25-Mar-17 18:58:08

Hello Tweedledee. I didn't want to read and run even though you will get responses from many more experienced people. Well done for getting help, it really is a huge step to do so. I struggled at around 5/6 months with anxiety and thankfully had a lovely health visitor who visited me once a month and helped me set goals to work towards. My anxiety got better and I also had a supportive GP that I saw and whose door is open if I feel I need to go back. I felt a bit blush for mine taking so long to come out, I didn't feel that way when dd was born. She was born after many years of secondary infertility so my anxiety was also linked to then feelings of being so ungrateful for her on days I found her hard work. I pretty much emotionally beat myself up.

One of my goals was being able to tell people how I was really feeling without crying. I would just cry if I tried to talk about it so I avoided telling anyone how I really felt. I found this easier to do with people I didn't know that well and to be honest none of my inlaws know I was ever struggling. My mum who had also had pnd was amazing. I haven't told work (just recently returned after mat leave) because I want to appear sane for my job. It's terrible really isn't it all the stigma and in reality they would be lovely but I feel like I need to keep m work face on.

However I do feel much better now and in control of my feelings and anxiety. I couldn't have go there without my HV who just let me talk and told me repeatedly that my feelings were normal. I just wish you well and unmumsnet hugs. The dark days are so hard but you will get to the light in the clouds.

There is a lovely fb group called Mummy on the Mend. They run groups not too far from where I live it I was never brave enough to go. They also have people on the fb page from all over and it's a closed supportive group.

Tweedledee3Tweedledum Sun 26-Mar-17 19:16:30

Hello, purple. Thank you for responding. I really appreciate you sharing your story with me, and I am happy things are now better for you.

I can totally relate to emotionally beating yourself up. I have done a lot of that today. How can I spend Mother's Day with my child, but rather than enjoy them, I just want to sit. I feel so guilty for feeling this way.

I have no contact with my mother. Today has been difficult.

user1490387695 Mon 27-Mar-17 15:49:15

It's stories like this that help other people who are going through a similar thing. My little one is 7 months and I have recently started feeling extremely sad and overwhelmed, something I didn't feel at all when she was born. Having a newborn and a 3 year old was a piece of cake and I literally felt like super mum! 6 months later and I feel completely overwhelmed and like the worlds worst mum. I feel like I don't want to talk to anyone about it because they won't believe me or that I can't possibly be feeling like this now when she is 7 months old. I have never in my life felt like this....it's pretty scary

Tweedledee3Tweedledum Mon 27-Mar-17 18:34:40

Hello, user smile. Have you thought about going to your gp? I too found it really difficult to be honest about how I was feeling, but I do think it is the first step to feeling better.

I totally understand the shame around feeling fine initially and all of a sudden that changes. I have found myself isolating myself from friends as I don't know how to tell them? I guess it is more common than I thought though.

Sending flowers. I hope today has been ok.

Tweedledee3Tweedledum Mon 27-Mar-17 18:35:51

Apparently, PND can occur within the first year of being a mum, when stopping breastfeeding or when periods return.

Tweedledee3Tweedledum Mon 27-Mar-17 18:36:42

For me, I think it was to do with the breakdown of my relationship with my own mother.

strawberrypavlova0510 Mon 27-Mar-17 21:10:23

I was the one who wrote the earlier message just changed my username!! Today hasn't been a great day I broke down to my mother in law and I guess said how I feel. Now I feel like everyone is going to be watching me constantly waiting for me to just completely lose it. I'm scared people are going to think I'm not capable of looking after my children. Also I have no idea how to bring up the subject of how I'm feeling to my husband as he doesn't really understand anything about mental health he thinks you should just "snap out of it" hope your day has been ok

Tweedledee3Tweedledum Tue 28-Mar-17 18:53:08

How are things today, strawberry? I'm sorry you don't find you get much support from your husband. Have you spoken to your mil since?

strawberrypavlova0510 Sat 01-Apr-17 22:34:53

Things seem to be going from bad to worse. Everyone seems to care apart from the one person I need to and that's him. Mil has been really supportive and the dr has been great and explained to my husband that it's not my fault I'm feeling like this and that it's not something I can help but he's basically told me I'm obviously not happy with him and the kids so snap out of it or he's gone. I have never felt so out of sorts in all my life and the fact I can't say why I'm feeling like it makes it worse. Sorry I feel like this is becoming my ranting page

Jay2o Fri 07-Apr-17 13:12:15

Hi ladies was going to post a thread about PND & then came across this. I've seen my hv who thinks I have PND & would like me to go to my GP. I was going to ask if people think it helped & judging by what you all have written I think it might. I'm in two minds with what to do I know in my head I need sorting out but find it difficult talking about how I feel especially to someone I don't know. I've been through a lot recently & my anxiety levels are sky high! I want to feel like myself again, happier & more positive about things.
Sending you all my best wishes not an easy thing to cope with x

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