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I hate the night feeds so much

(23 Posts)
Pyjamaramadrama Tue 14-Jul-15 17:03:32

Ds2 is 4 weeks old now and I'm finding the night feeds hideous. Does anyone else feel the same?

I breastfed him for the first week so we had the two hourly feeds through the night. Since he's been on formula he's probably slept pretty well most nights but I'm still struggling.

He's slept from 9-3 then 4-7 a few times, other times it's been 9-2 then 3 till 5. A few times I've been up for 2-3 hours with him not settling back down, last night was like this, I think he must have either had trapped wind or been overtired as he was inconsolable. Last night I ended up on the sofa with him so as not to keep dp and ds1 up too.

He hasn't slept hardly at all in the day past two days either so no chance for a daytime sleep.

I'm besotted with ds and adore my time with him in the day but my tiredness is making me miserable and snappy with everyone else.

Dp already takes over when he gets in from work but I don't think it's fair for him to do night feeds as he works 12 hour days with a long commute. I already nap in the day if I can but do have school run to do and doing the basics round the house.

Ds is also quite sicky which makes things worse as I can't put him straight back down.

I know it gets better eventually, ds1 slept 11-12 hours by 6 months, but I don't want to wish my brand new babies months away, I just wish that babies aren't designed to keep us up at night!

Anyone else struggling, feels very lonely at 3am.

Lweji Tue 14-Jul-15 21:13:34

Not anymore, but it is known that young babies tend to wake up and feed a lot at around 2 am.
I was able to breastfeed DS, so a lot less faff during night feeds, but it is still hard, so I definitely sympathise.

It helps to keep the room dark and as quiet as possible so that they get used to being night time.

Also check for gas. Put him at a 30º angle for a few minutes after feeding and before burping.

bangingthedrums Tue 14-Jul-15 21:16:19

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Purpleboa Wed 15-Jul-15 02:07:01

Me! Currently on feed no 3 and hoping that my DD will settle and let me sleep for more than an hour sad I'm breastfeeding so it's been pretty relentless. Total shock to the system (DD is 3 weeks old). It's my birthday today and I don't want to be shattered, was kinda hoping DD might sense that and give me a break grin

Please someone tell me it gets better??

LucyBabs Wed 15-Jul-15 02:15:42

I shudder remembering night feeds! Never again! Sorry op flowers
My ds Is almost four and he too never slept during the day and then woke every two hours during the night. Then like magic at 14 months slept through the night after I had exhausted every option. I didn't do anything other than go to bed as usual and he slept through! He still confuses me smile

BumWad Wed 15-Jul-15 02:15:57

Yes. I hear you. DS who is 7 weeks but 3 days corrected has been on and off my boob since midnight. In knackered. DH has started giving him a bottle so I can grab some sleep. DS also has reflux so it's the faffing with the burping and keeping upright that's a chore as well.

So very tired.

Turquoisetamborine Wed 15-Jul-15 02:58:11

Me too! I have a twelve week old. On a good night he wakes at 1am then 5am but can be bfing for up to two hours so it's shattering.
DS2 took til 8 months to sleep through so hoping it's not as long this time.

Purpleboa Wed 15-Jul-15 03:17:18

flowers to you all. I never knew it was possible to dread bedtime this much sad

WorldsBiggestGrotbag Wed 15-Jul-15 03:38:36

My 20 month old is still up twice a night and I'm currently BF-ing my 6 day old who has so far been feeding since 7pm last night with no break... I hate all feeds not just night ones sad

madeuplovesong44 Wed 15-Jul-15 03:50:07

I'm up feeding my six month old twins with my two year old now in my bed after a bit of a battle! I hate night feeds too!! You have my every sympathy.

sugartees Wed 15-Jul-15 03:57:35

Pretty much identical situation to you OP - windy little man, a month old, waking similar times.

It's 3.50am, have been awake since 2.30 sad he's asleep now but only just...

We'll get day it'll be a distant memory. I can't remember this with DC1 so it must be something I blanked out!

I am trying to appreciate that the time when DS wants to gurgle and coo at me in the early hours will be short lived.

I can hear DP snoring in the spare room. Oh to be that deeply asleep angry

Hang in there smile

Lilipot15 Wed 15-Jul-15 04:15:28

I too struggle with night feeds - when I try to put my four week old down, even after sitting her upright and trying my best to wind her, she writhes, moans and groans. Nappy changes invariably cause a vomit.
She isn't like this in the daytime when I can lay her down quite soon after a feed so not rushing to get gaviscon etc.

Toddler up early so it's a strain.

I am BF and struggling with immense tiredness after each night feed - if only my milk had the same soporific effect on DD2!

Hello Worldsbiggestgrotbag - I have seen you on other threads. Congratulations on your new baby.

purplemurple1 Wed 15-Jul-15 04:25:35

With mine I find its best to put them straight down after a feed and let the burp 'gather' then after a few mins take him up and wind him sometimes it works first go sometimes it takes a couple bit its much faster than the normal winding method.
I also have the head end of the cot propped up.


WorldsBiggestGrotbag Wed 15-Jul-15 07:14:53

Thank you lilipot and apologies for my middle of the night grumpy post! This is one hungry baby!

Artistic Wed 15-Jul-15 07:22:51

The first 3 months are quite hard. But I think it's only fair that your DH shares the night duties. Despite his long hours he's probably having easier days than you, so nights are equally hard on you both. At least 2-3 night you should get to sleep uninterrupted so you can soldier on for the others. It's a long journey ahead so conserve your energy.

Artandco Wed 15-Jul-15 07:25:47

I would try dream feeding baby just before you go to sleep. So you say baby is sleeping 9pm- 3am roughly. I would feed baby at 8pm as currently, then at 10.30/11pm before you sleep feed him again whilst he's half asleep still. Then resettle. You then have a higher chance of him sleeping 6hrs from that last feed, so more like 5.30-6am. Feed him then, and resettle. He might sleep until 8am from then.
It means later added feed, but then only woken once on average once your actually asleep. Even if he sleeps 11-3am, then 3-6/7am at least it's only once your actually woken

Lilipot15 Wed 15-Jul-15 07:30:20

Gosh. I wish my DH could share night feeds! Although he does get up early with the toddler and has been in the spare room with the monitor for her.
Thanks for the winding tip Purple - I shall try it and I hope it helps you too OP.

OP - I wonder if you should soeak to your HV about the possibility of reflux? Particularly if your baby unsettled in the day too? Many first had reflux and my second is behaving a bit like that at night so I am watching and waiting and will try elevating cot.

Roseybee10 Fri 17-Jul-15 11:11:09

Dd2 is almost 6 months and finally we're down to one night feed (dd1 dropped all night feeds at around 10 weeks).
Up until about a month ago it took two hours to give her a night feed argh. To be fair she's a great sleeper in between feeds so I can't complain too much. Dd1 didn't want fed but was up all night every night from 4-8 months so I'd far rather the feeds than the waking and refusing to sleep.

My hubby does a Tuesday night and a Saturday night which helps.

IWantDogger Tue 21-Jul-15 21:09:51

Just wanted to stand in solidarity with you and say I too hate the night feeds! Dd3 is 6 weeks. Formula fed after the first couple of wks of mix feeding. Reading what some people are going through here, things aren't too bad but I'm just so rubbish at tiredness and it makes me very tearful and down.
She's currently doing 10ish, 3ish 7.30ish on a good night and 9ish, 1/2ish, 5/6ish on a bad one. Because of the bottles I find it easier to come downstairs wake up properly and watch something on tv. A good Feed she'll be back in bed after 1 hour, sometimes she'll be awake for 2hrs plus.
Sometimes I have to have her on me because she won't settle back down but generally she's ok in her crib.
I'm sorry because j know things aren't as bad as for others but I feel so tired and down. I think one of the worst things is not knowing what the night will hold, which way it will go.

Other DCs are 7 and 4 and rubbish at going to bed/sleep.
Dh commutes and is away from the house 630am til 830pm and this wk is out 3 nights til about 11pm so I feel pretty much on my own.

Anyway, it will pass won't it? I found things much easier with my other two from 3 months and we're halfway there already.

Pyjamaramadrama Wed 22-Jul-15 01:15:17

Sounds quite similar to here iwantdogger. I feel a bit bad moaning as it sounds as though some are having much worse nights.

Ds has decided to wake up at 12.30 tonight though so who knows, he seems extra hungry, perhaps he's having his 6 week growth spurt a week early.

It's the nights when they decide that they don't want to go back to sleep that are the worst, but you never know when that will be.

Sometimes I can pop ds down and he'll go to sleep beautifully others not so much.

Crazyqueenofthecatladies Fri 31-Jul-15 18:14:54

Sounds like reflux possibly linked to cmpi - which is often called delayed milk allergy because it shows up a few weeks in. The sofa is the most dangerous place to settle a baby at night btw.

Purpleboa Sat 01-Aug-15 00:37:34

Anyone else awake and feeding? DD has taken a turn for the worse with her sleeping - when she's awake it's so difficult to settle her again. I had hoped things were getting better as we approach the 6 week mark but I guess it's not a linear process. Have just scoffed three choc hobnobs and want more sad

thinkfast Thu 13-Aug-15 22:04:19

Anyone else still striggling with this? Dd2 is 8 weeks and I feel so exhausted I can't cope. She had her jabs yesterday and I had a total of 3 1/2 hours broken sleep last night. Have been trying to settle her since 7pm tonight but no luck yet - plus my sons keep waking herconfused

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