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H/V had a go at me

(10 Posts)
Amanda89x Tue 26-Jul-16 18:04:10

Dd (5 weeks old) was due a visit from health visitor this morning, but had a terrible nights sleep so I didn't wake up until the h/v was chapping at the door. Went to go and find the keys only to realise my oh has taken them to work with his by mistake which led to the hv having a go at me through the letter box saying its a fire hazard and I should always know where they are. I'm going to completely honest and admit I've taken this way more to heart than I should have, but with the lack of sleep last night and just generally having a difficult couple of days with my mood, i took it really hard. would anyone else have been upset by it? Just looking for some comfort I think.

DowntonDiva Tue 26-Jul-16 18:13:38

When DD was 3 weeks old I got a massive telling off from a bitch of a midwife as my DP had taken her out for a walk without me and in her words "BABY SHOULD ALWAYS BE WITH MUM"

In my sleep deprived state I just nodded and apologised and then cried for an hour. What I should have done is told her to sod off and state I was delighted my baby was getting some fresh air while I was still unable to walk from an episiotomy.

HCP can sometime be a bit curt, and HV point out the bloody obvious. You're tired, have a cry and get it out then take no notice. This phase will pass I promise flowers

calamityjam Tue 26-Jul-16 18:19:47

Presumably you could have exited through a downstairs window in an emergency? ignore and move on, she's pissed off because yours is another visit she will have to rearrange.

DelphiniumBlue Tue 26-Jul-16 18:23:14

I would be upset with DH more than the HV. Are you saying that you were locked in? I would be furious, it certainly is a fire hazard. But I would feel patronised if the HV told me that, especially by calling through the letterbox. You are not a child, and should not be ' told off' by HV, it's bad enough being locked in without being made to feel it's your fault!

Cashewnutts Tue 26-Jul-16 18:27:13

Agree with Delphinium I would have been furious with my OH.
IME I haven't met any non-patronising/rude HVs. They all seem to have a chip on their shoulder about something.
Maybe get a spare key cut and leave it somewhere safe in case. If you have access to your back door from driveway/street a key for that indoors might also be a good idea.

Sirzy Tue 26-Jul-16 18:31:38

The HV shouldn't have been rude BUT she was right to raise concerns really. Being locked in a house is potentially dangerous and I doubt a HV could just walk away without saying anything.

You need to make sure you have a spare key cut and somewhere easily accessible

SavoyCabbage Tue 26-Jul-16 18:38:28

I agree with Delphinium too. She shouldn't have told you off. Your dp should get keys cut on the way home.

I once went to my friends house and she was locked in like this and I have to say it made me feel a bit panicky. And frustrated as we couldn't do what we had planned.

Amanda89x Tue 26-Jul-16 18:40:35

We have a spare key at my mums who lives in the next street but she had my niece and nephew at the time so by the time she would have got dressed and up here, the hv wouldn't have had time to wait. I appreciate its a wasted visit for her. Getting another spare key cut is a good idea though. Just wish they weren't so bloody patronising lol

Funnyface1 Thu 08-Sep-16 18:15:24

My second baby is a week old today. After a patronising and unhelpful experience with the "service" the first time round I have declined to see them this time. If they are not helpful or friendly they are just a stranger poking around your home and I don't welcome that. If I had a genuine concern about my baby I would not be going to a health visitor. I'm glad some people have had good experiences but most people I have spoken to have not and its not compulsory to see them.

Fuzzywuzzywasabear Sat 17-Sep-16 12:08:08

Same thing happened to me! Midwife turned up for 1st visit 2 days after birth and dh had gone to the shops and locked me in! They had to pull the bins out from the sie of the house and come through the back door blush

Don't be hard on yourself ignore the stupid HV I'm sure you could have got out in an emergency if you had to flowers

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