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Leaving NCT

(2 Posts)
CarleyB15 Tue 31-May-16 12:29:46

I'm feeling bad because I've decided that I need to stop seeing my NCT group. I started NCT when i was pregnant with my first son a year ago now at the recommendation of my mother in law.

Everyone in the group is lovely I just don't feel that I fit. The ladies are all more affluent than myself and I would say most are from a more privileged back ground. They all appear to have a lot in common with one another and I always come away feeling more lonely than when I went. They always make me feel very welcome when I go.

Ever since the start they have all made loads of effort to meet every week sometimes twice a week and j just haven't had the energy to keep up with them. I have always felt that it's is too difficult to connect with individuals when we are in a group of 6 mums with babies, especially with my boy who demands a lot of attention and won't nap on the go. I've got to feeling like a bad mum compared to them as I don't take my so to all the baby groups like they do.

I'm feeling bad because I have now decided that I don't feel comfortable and have not connected with them and that its time to stop going. There is a what's app group that is really hard to ignore but if I leave the group it will announce it to the whole group and it will seem rude if I don't explain why. But how can I explain it to them?

One of them has texted me after I hadn't responded to what's app for over a week to ask if I was going for coffee this morning. I feel so rude but continuing to go to the meet ups is making me feeling inadequate because I don't have the money and lifestyle or anything in common. I don't consider myself a person who lacks confidence but I definitely feel insecure around the group.

Has anyone else experienced this? How do I politely excuse myself?

MigGril Tue 31-May-16 12:40:04

Yes my NCT antenatal group was like this, but our contact was via email as 7 years ago not everyone had smart phones.

We just drifted apart, we didn't meet up as often thank goodness and one member moved overseas. So that seemed like a natural break.

I made much better friends at our local NCT coffee morning group which was made up of mums of children of different ages and a more down to earth sort of background as well. Not such high flights.

I like you would leave a meet up feeling less confident then when I went.

If you haven't bonded with any of them to make good friends by now it's probably not going to happen.

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