Success after miscarriage- Lets give thanks

(509 Posts)
cori Tue 23-May-06 10:17:34

I feel a little bit bad about starting this thread just now as there have been heartbreaking stories on mumsnet over the past couple of days. Ladies our thoughts are with you.

This antenatal club is particularly special, as after a long difficult nine months for all of us we are now the lucky ones who get to hold our beautiful little babies. There are lots of challenges ahead for us, of course. but hopefully we can all continue to offer support , advice and friendship during the more happy times

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slinkstah Wed 24-May-06 09:44:26

lol cori you must be so tired hun putting this is the antenatal section- you gave me a giggle

how are the sleepless nights going anyway?
hope feeding is going well too

petunia and wills hope your both recovered and babies are doing well

petunia Wed 24-May-06 10:51:56

Hi Cori and Wills,
Just signing in, I'm here as well. Little Emily is not so little now! She weighed 8lbs 9 last week. Not bad from the 6lbs 10 she was at birth. Can't believe that was 4 weeks ago tomorrow. There's something in that there breast milk!

Hope you and your babies are doing well and here's to some more members joining soon!

cori Thu 25-May-06 17:21:36

hi, feeding is improving. Nathaniel hasnow 7lb `3oz so has regained birth weight and put on some, so feel a bit relieved now that I am doing something right.

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Wills Fri 26-May-06 18:04:48

Hi guys. Should have looked sooner. So hows things? I have sore boobs! Am struggling with nights a little but then what did I expect at 5 days old. Had an awful midwife visit yesterday - seriously feel that the profession of midwives should only open to mothers! She asked if I was having problems and I told her that he's content to sleep during the day and feed all night and that I was struggling a little. Her solution "can't you get someone else to look after your other kids and that way you can sleep when baby sleeps for the next couple of months until he's ready". That'll be out of a manual then.

We're off tomorrow to see the Ramsgate house. We haven't been for at least 4 weeks and its been seriously worrying us that something might have happened. Fingers crossed all is well.

cori Fri 26-May-06 19:31:36

Wills, I have to admit to the sucumbing to giving a bottle of formula at night, couldnt handle the on and off feeding frenzy all the night long. especially when i came home from hospital with that bad neck pain. He has a bottle of formula, which lasts the whole night. SO we do manage to get some sleep, during the day he feeds off and on. Everyday is different at the moment, but starting to relax about it. Went to breas feeding support group yesterday which was helpful

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Wills Sun 11-Jun-06 21:25:11

Oh Cori I'm giving up. Have been in floods of tears but giving him a bottle after 2 hours of feeding or tears he takes 4 ozs, coos and then falls asleep. Am shattered trying and upset that I managed with two but am not with him. he's soooo hungry!

petunia Mon 12-Jun-06 21:59:35

Oh Wills, poor you. You must feel awful having to give up, especially after doing so well with your other children.

Emily now weighs 10lbs10oz and is 6 1/2 weeks old. I'm still breastfeeding and she only wakes 2-3 times a night. Having said that, she sleeps in the bed with us. She has refused to go in the carrycot beside the bed.

Hope we have some more people joining us here soon- there's been a long gap since someone new joined!

Wills Tue 13-Jun-06 07:07:03

Thanks Petunia. Glad to hear Emily's doing well. Its blooming frustrating but I'm trying to see the good side i.e. loss of the last bit of weight, faster feeding and dh takes the 1 night time feed.

slinkstah Tue 13-Jun-06 10:14:56

hiya all
just popping in to see how your babies are.
been missing ya now your in postnatal land hows it all going?
don't worry wills about BF i know how it feels to try so hard and it just not work out, it was like that with ds.
I am going to go in with an attitude like i will give it a good effort but if i get stressed and it not working out then i will give up and do bottles too.
i think your happiness and ability to enjoy this time is more important than BF.

ill be here soon i hope, raspberry teaing it today

diddle Wed 28-Jun-06 07:17:00

morning ladies, thought i should join you now i have finally popped.

cori Wed 28-Jun-06 14:30:39

Hello diddle, Just saw your birth announcement. Have been offline since last week. How are you feeling, how is the recovery from the section?

Maybe this thread will get a bit more active now that there is a few off us.

Wills are you around. How are you feeling? Did you manage to keep BF. I know how hard it is.

Slink,How are you dear?

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cori Wed 28-Jun-06 14:31:14

And Petunia.
How is your little one?

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diddle Wed 28-Jun-06 17:27:09

Hi Cori,

feeling ok thank you, very very achy and sore today.

Have also had the BF problem, but much earlier on than the rest of you. my nipples are so sore, one bled yesterday, and i was a right state, sobbing. Little Josh fed from 9am until 1pm, snacking all the time. Although i persevered and didn't let him latch on wrong, midwife even checked and said i was doing it well. I think the frequency of feeding made them sore.
He hardly slept and wanted feeding all the time. i lost it, feel like an emotional wreck and a failure to be honest. But i know he's had the first few days of milk. So after much deliberation i have stopped, he had his first bottle last night, and gulped down 3 ounces, then slept from 9pm until 6.3am straight through he was obviously not getting what he needed from me, he's a big baby, almost 9lb's, and must take a lot of filling.
Have had a much much calmer day today, Josh is sleeping well, waking for a bottle and is a much happier baby. They can sense your tension can't they.

Am finding it hard to get comfy in bed and sitting too.

well i'm sure i've depressed the hell out of you now, sorry to moan, feeling rather hormonal and emotional.

slinkstah Wed 28-Jun-06 18:21:56

hiya all
dids im feeling emotional too, and BF isn't going too well
mainly because babys tongue won't stick forward as the ligament underneath it is too tight, its called tongue tied. theres a simple procedure/op to fix it but dr says it won't be done before baby is 1 and if i continue to have probs i should give formula.
anyway so i have my midwife trying to bypass gp and get me into see a pedatritian asap but if Eden puts on weight they say no need to treat even though BF is agony and i have engorged boobs and swollen golf balls under my armpits
Still theres hope as dp today found a private pedatritian who can treat if neccessary for £150 so i am feeling less stressed about it all.

thats amazing how joshua slept through last night i have to say im rather envious, eden is feeding little and often because he tires himself out by sucking wrong.

on the bright side i felt my stitches today and have to say they've done a cracking job- my fanjo is not broken too bad

when do they take your stitches out diddle?

hi cori, pet and wills give us an update on your LO's

cori Wed 28-Jun-06 19:03:54

Diddle, it really is hell when they are feeding all the time like that. How many days old is Josh? nathaneil fed frequently at the begining too, all babies do i think. My solution to stop me from going mad, and not 'too' guilty about formula is to breast feed during the day and to give bottles at night. So he sleeps well, and i get some time where i know I can switch off. DH also gets up for the middle of the night feed

Nathaniel is doing well, had his 6 week check on Monday. Weighs over 10lbs now. He has been a little bit colicky which is a bit hard to deal with, I have also found myself bursting into tears on the odd occassion but on the whole i feel OK. He doesnt sleep well during the day so i have to take him out in his pushchair to sleep, but the little mite seems to sense when ever i walk into a shop and wakes up crying. grr
I am going to a baby massage class tomorrow. Need to find daily acitivites as am going to go a little stir crazy at home.
As he is now 7 weeks i feel the need to start getting out with more.

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diddle Wed 28-Jun-06 19:20:21

Cori - Joshua is only. 5 days old, so still getting as much food as he can, feel i can cope much better now he's on bottles, and his daddy loves helping out and being able to feed him too.

cori Wed 28-Jun-06 21:10:43

It does make a big difference to know there is an alternative doesn't it.
I was very pleased to see your announcement, i shed a few tears. I remember the absolute wonder and excitement when DS 1 was born, (not quite the same second time round IYKWIM).

Nathaniel is screaming now for last BF of the night.

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Wills Mon 03-Jul-06 21:23:19

Wahoooo - company!!!!!!!!!!! Well if I'd know that there was a party going on...... I've just posted on the other thread .... my excuse is that ds simply refuses to allow me to prop him on the desk and type one handed - very selfish of him I know but heck he's started to coo so I have to forgive him.

I'm still struggling to some extent but am settling into it iyswim. The hot weather is NOT helping. Basically he has two sessions one from the moment he wakes up i.e. 7.30 ish to about 11.00 when he feeds basically continuous with much wailing when I walk the girls into school (I suspect some of the school mums think I'm starving him on purpose!) and then from about 5.00ish to 11.00 ish (dh has him at the moment). BUT he's done two nights all the way through so I really shouldn't complain. We've now settled into mixed feeding which has allowed the thrush to settle to a point where its bearable (but unfortunately not go!). I hate this thrush but am determined to enjoy this baby with no holes barred and dh has assured me that this is the last!

Diddle/Slink - I truly think bf is awful at first which is why soooo many stop. But if you can keep going it does get better and honestly I'm finding bottles a complete and annoying pfaff (admitedly I have to boil all teats for a minimum of twenty minutes to remove the thrush). The advantage I'm finding with mixed feeding is that dh is still doing the middle of the night shift (normally only one) and he does feed faster from a bottle and if its not during his feeding frenzys I can at least spend some time with the girls.

Anyway I'm going on. Diddle - don't feel guilty honey - we worked too hard to get where we are! Its vital that as soon as you can you settle back and simply enjoy your baby. They grow up soooo fast and when they're 16 and informing you that you hate you I can almost 99.99% guarantee that one of their reasons for hating you will NOT be whether or not you bottle or breast fed them.

Cori - glad to see someone else's husband doing the graveyard shift.

cori Mon 03-Jul-06 21:48:29

very good point wills, in years to come the kids will being saying 'you dont love me because you wont buy me X,Y and Z' Not because 'you gave me formula'.
Mixed feeding works best for me too. Where did you get those tommee tippee mixed feeding bottles from Wills?
Slept through for the first time last night too.

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Wills Mon 03-Jul-06 21:58:36

Boots - they're on half price offer so seriously good value. But the jury's still out

petunia Mon 03-Jul-06 22:21:03

Evening all,
Sorry not been on lately. My lovely Aunt died a few weeks ago and her funeral/cremation coincided with the 1st anniversary of my m/c as well, so kind of a sad week. She lived in Australia and her ashes have been brought over to be buried with my Nan and Grandad on Wednesday.

Emily's now 9 1/2 weeks and weighs 11lbs 5oz. I'm still breastfeeding (so no "going through the night" for me yet!) but at least she usually only wakes 2 or 3 times a night (not like DD1 who needed feeding every 2 hours day and night!) She also had her 1st jabs last week. Think it was worse for me than for her! When your little ones have theirs, don't forget to get Calpol in (although Sainsbury's do their own, other supermarkets might do their own too) because they can have 2.5ml if they have a temperature afterwards.

Glad everyone's doing well and there's a few more members! I'm off to give yet another feed!

Wills Tue 04-Jul-06 14:27:24

Oh pet that's a bad week honey. Well done on the b/f!

Well I'm not sure how much I'll be on for the next couple of weeks. We move house on Monday. Handling a newborn, a toddler and a 6 year old that's seriously upset about moving is more than enough for me without trying to pack boxes etc. Its a little chaotic here at the moment! Wish me luck cos I'm gonna need it! Oh and if anyone can think of how to juggle a colicky baby in the evening when I'm trying to put the other two to bed I'd be glad for some thoughts. Will probably start a thread at some point.... Will be on when I can but will definitely be thinking of you all.

petunia Tue 04-Jul-06 14:42:49

Hi Wills,
DD1 had really bad colic and just wanted to be held all the time. When someone I know had the same problem with her DD, I suggested using one of those sling type things and lent her ours. Then you've got both hands free. Haven't tried it myself but think it worked for her.

petunia Tue 04-Jul-06 14:43:24

Meant to add, good luck with the move.

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