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March 2013: Smiles, sleep & excellent feeding.....the thread of wishful thinking!

(998 Posts)
SoYo Tue 07-May-13 21:52:31

Well we may as well start the thread on a positive note before the grumbling about the little darlings begins!!!

SoYo Fri 10-May-13 15:04:16

Another one for the sartorial challenge of a wedding! 25th march here, I went shopping 2 days ago & found nothing for less than £100. Not happy! I'll try again at the weekend. Plus it's bloody difficult trying clothes on with massive pram in tow!

pudtat Fri 10-May-13 16:19:32

Stormy, to raise the Moses basket I used some of the polystyrene blocks which we seem inundated with from purchases for small person. Stacked them to right height and held together with wooden BBQ skewers. Good cos feet slightly sink in so more stable.

However, have to swaddle the boy and wedge between two rolled up blankets as otherwise he sinks towards the bottom and did end up nearly under his blanket the first time he slept in it! Oops...

pudtat Fri 10-May-13 18:04:33

We're not the only ones with weddings coming up mumsnetty thread some useful links...?

ecofreckle Fri 10-May-13 18:25:57

gosh you lot are prolific! It's taken me 3 days to catch up with your news.

Eig - like everyone else it sounds like you have come to a good conclusion. You and DH are the people whose opinions matter. Sounds like a sensible way forward. How have you found (evil?) baby whisperer book?

Soyo - I have a very very sore right nipple too (maybe it's a sign we are in a secret club a la masons or whoever they are that bare their nipples ceremoniously..). It's very strange. Breast feeding counsellor has checked us out. GP has ruled out thrush. It doesn't hurt when I pump on the right nipple. It's the first 60 seconds or so of DD latching on. I literally cannot continue a conversation during that time. Dread RHS feeds. Bah.

Worcs/Soyo/Plonko (are you the mummies of bottle refusers?) - we have one of these too. She took the first bottle like a dream (made me cry to see her at the time "she doesn't need mummy any more" thoughts whizzing through my addled brain), but not since. We have done a lot of thinking through this one. The BF counsellor observed my "impressive let down" so we thought a bigger hole might help but no joy with size 2 TT ones either. Then tried variflow TT ones as they are supposed to be better for babies familiar with BF. No joy. Have just purchased very expensive medela bottle (which is actually designed for feeding expressed milk though) which looks super engineered; yet to try it though. We 3 went to a book launch last night (get us! stupid! had to leave two thirds of way through of course due to screaming baby in adult situation) and chatted to a lady who also had a bottle refuser and her top tip was do not cradle your baby when feeding a bottle. They associate that with boob feeds. Instead plonk them in theri bouncy chair and poke the bottle in their face. Funnily enough the essay that came with the medela bottle also suggests this too. We will try this. Tomorrow! It's Friday afterall so we're giving ourselves a break.

Wind/Pud - weddings eh? could always rely on pashmina to shroud baby in to make the feeds more subtle. Or you could just wear whatever you want and retreat for the feeds? I was thinking strappy empire line might work quite nicely but then you need the hefty bra straps concealed don't you? Hhmmm.... I'll mull it over. We have a wedding in october when DD will be 6 months but it's in Joshua Tree in California so I'm anticipating wearing next to nothing anyway to cope with the heat. Have bought DD a very sweet sleeveless cotton dress with matching pants but that's going a little off topic....

It's been so long since I was on here that I missed the jobs and sex chat. Skills wise I have very few but on environmental education, learning for sustainability and kids generally learnign outdoors I could probably bore you. Sex wise...ha ha ha....DD is a honeymoon baby and that's the last time there was any action. Like someone else I felt too crappy for first 4 months and then there was a baby right there sticking out and that messed with my karma and now I have the aftermath of 3rd degree tears, a suspected prolapse and an anal fissure so that's not an especially delightful combo either. Great start to married life ladies. My DH is very very very patient. Thank heavens.

Hope that you all have a good start to your weekend. The reason I am on here is because DH came back from work and took baby out for a walk. Peace currently reigns.

Eigmum Fri 10-May-13 20:05:34

eco lovely to hear from you. We are currently in the middle of witching hour here. Ds asleep in my bed for first time ever ( was jealous as dd gets to come in here to feed!) and dd refusing to go to bed. A honeymoon baby! How lovely, took my husband 5 years of marriage to persuade me kids was a good idea, still have days I am not convinced it was but too late now!

Eigmum Fri 10-May-13 20:08:45

I think the baby whisperer is good. As my ds is what she would call an angel baby I loosely followed giba's routine for him. I say loosely as I didn't push him through the night it anything. He dropped 3 am feed at 13 weeks and at 16 weeks one night we forgot the dream feed and he slept til 7 am so we just never did it again! Dd is clearly not do simple so doing the easy method.

Eigmum Fri 10-May-13 20:10:19

Can't type as have dd attached to boob. Never had this issue with SA, he was in his cot and asleep by 7 without fail having downed 8 ounces by this age!

Eigmum Fri 10-May-13 20:10:44

For SA read DS !

SoYo Fri 10-May-13 20:10:52

We're back at home, as much as the sleeping was initially a bit rubbish at my parents it was lovely seeing them for a week & seeing how much DD's face lit up when I took her down to them every morning. So lovely being back with DH though! I'm attempting the nighttime routine again tonight but not sure it'll be as successful with a venue change added in.

Have a good night everyone. I'm sure I'll be back soon!

ecofreckle Fri 10-May-13 20:29:24

Eig as soon as dh and dd returned from walk we got witching hour too. Rubbish! However, instead of three hours it was, true to the name, just an hour. Boob and cuddles finally made her cave and she is sleeping angelically. So hard to believe just an hour ago she was a writhing, red faced, ball of snot.
(evil) baby whisperer made me feel (actually I made myself feel) like a terrible mother a few weeks ago as she suggested everything we were experiencing was due to poor latching on. Even seemingly unrelated things. But I do like easy concept and we try that. Although on two hour day time cycle. Don't like the prescribed timetable set out for a four week old tho. That just makes you feel shite! Mine's six and half and nowhere near the 'standard'!! But we're pleased with our progress and there lies the moral of the story perhaps? Take book things with a pinch of salt, listen to eig/pud/stormy et al's real life real time wisdoms and trust your instincts :-)

ecofreckle Fri 10-May-13 20:31:38

Bloody phone! Was just changing soymilk to soyo and it decided to post early....
So, soyo, just wanted to say good luck with change of routine location. You may be pleasantly surprised?

ecofreckle Fri 10-May-13 20:39:27

I have finally got with the programme formatting! How advanced :-) too much time on my hands evidently. Am hiding from husband in bath. I shouted earlier about his bottle feeding technique. Bad woman. Sigh.

WingDefence Fri 10-May-13 21:26:58

Evening all!

Eco I'm sure I've read somewhere that with painful sides you can express on one side and feed from the other until everything's better which would save you feeding from your right?

Eig my double, my DS was also angel baby and put himself into a routine but DD is a bit more difficult! I've not looked at my BW book for a few weeks as that 4 week old schedule looked crazy. I may look again next week .

Have been upstairs with a swaddled DD feeding her for an hour. The first half I was nattering with my best mate, put DD down at 8:50 but she woke up after five mins so I've been feeding her again (I'm sure it's comfort?) and have just put her down again.

So the dilemma again of whether I bother to try to wake her at 10:30...

leniwhite Fri 10-May-13 21:49:45

Can't type. Too traumatised by spiders and afraid to walk with bare feet without all the lights on... confused

plonko Fri 10-May-13 22:14:14

Eig and Wing I think I may have been slightly blessed with an angel baby. Does that mean I'm in for more of a challenge next time? Apparently I refused to sleep until I turned two, so karma may be playing a ^ very^ long game.

Eig I hope the thrush clears up soon. Great that you've made a decision though, I believe that's half the battle.

Eco DS loves his his bottle but loathes Mr Tippee with a passion.interesting what you say about cuddling whilst bottle feeding- I feel that since I haven't boob fed for 6 weeks now it's a lovely way for us to bond but he does incline his head towards the more traditional milk dispensing area. We also like to feed upright as he's a bit hiccuppy/mildly refluxy from time to time, but I will experiment with feeding in the chair.

I have two weddings to attend this summer and am considering wearing a bin liner. One has a blanket ban on kids so I can even parade DS as a excuse for my saggy belly. The other is on my birthday so I'm just going to make a beeline for the Chardonnay.

Oh and RE creepy crawlies- DPs brother is a zoologist and enjoys breeding mental animals to sell as pets. So far I've lived with a cat, two snakes, a preying mantis (called Boris), a crested gecko and a colony of singing crickets that escaped whilst I attempted to feed the goddamn gecko. Needless to say we now just have a cat. And a baby.

WingDefence Fri 10-May-13 22:20:59

Plonko - I'm probably doing DD a disservice actually. She's not a bad baby but I just remember DS being brilliant - well, apart from not taking to BFing at all!

I think Eco was saying use the upright position when you're trying to bottle feed and are still BFing so they associate upright feeding with a different type of delivery method? One if the things I absolutely loved about ff was the fact that DS would stare directly up into my eyes and we really could bond. Whereas with BFing DD looks at me out of the corner of her eye sometimes but generally is staring at my armpit! (Which is one of the reasons it does annoy me when people talking about how BFing is better for bonding - I adored that eye contact.)

Not sure what to do in ten mins about DD. Probably won't wake her and will have to deal with the consequences confused

plonko Fri 10-May-13 22:35:21

Wing - no I'm sure your DD is just lovely, full of vulnerable newborn snuffle squishiness. But after a bottle guzzler it must be something of a shock to get the total opposite in a second baby.

I miss the contact if BFing and that specific connection but you're so right about eye contact. I love that DP can share that bond with us. It makes me so soppy, but then I have been known to cry at my own baby cos he's just so bloody lovely.

What would happen if you didn't wake her?

SoYo Fri 10-May-13 22:44:07

Bedtime failed. Got her down after over an hour & started screaming 10mins later. We were just starting dinner so brought her downstairs where she gurgled happily for 10mins while I shoved food down then snag her to sleep. She snoozed for 20mons then woke up screaming so we're trying family bedtime now. Hope she goes down because I'm shattered! Hope yours is better behaved than mine Wing. Whenever the wake vs don't question comes to me I always think don't in case tonight's the night hell sleep through....I'm always disappointed!

WingDefence Fri 10-May-13 22:47:43

Well I'm not sure what will happen given she has gone from 9:30-4:30 in the past but I expect she'll wake up earlier than normal eg 12-1 (like last night which was an arse) as opposed to anything between 2 and 5!

Too late now..!

Eig, I forgot to say that my DS has also been moving himself into our bed at night for the last few weeks (but not for the last few nights thank goodness) because he sees DD in our room. It's an effect having her has had on him that I completely didn't foresee - he asks every few days. How long it is until she goes into her own room. I can completely understand it: he must think he's being left out sad

Right, off to bed. Pleeeease stay asleep for a decent length of time DD!

WingDefence Fri 10-May-13 22:49:02

Oh no SoYo! Good luck for the rest of the night...

leniwhite Sat 11-May-13 01:07:31

Oh, weddings; i just bought a 'butterfly' BFing cover that ties on the shoulder and on one side of the waist - could be a more attractive option?

Made by Faye and Lou

WingDefence Sat 11-May-13 01:11:49

Right, remind me tomorrow to wake DD when I ask... she stated stirring at 12:30 so I rocked the Moses basket a bit when she did until she finally started crying at 1:05. I've changed her and she's now feeding. Really this isn't working for me as we seem to have gone backwards hmm

ecofreckle Sat 11-May-13 01:42:18

Wing glad you also agree bw four week schedule looks a tad over optimistic. And thanks for express on right tip. I'm guessing as she won't take from bottle I'd just freeze right boob milk and use just left with her for a few days?
Plonko I see what you mean about feeding in a chair and the lack of bond. I guess if every feed is from bottle that'd be a big issue. Not thought about that. If we aim for one feed per day on bottle I guess it's more palatable as an idea. It'd feel weird though I think just sticking out at them.
Sorry a few others of you seem to be having sub optimal nights. Same here. Something in the water perhaps? Funny how it's two steps forward one step back sometimes with this baby lark.
Stormy, was it you who found black out blind success? We are trying tonight for first time. Hoping for weekend lie in as a result! Positive thinking!

SoYo Sat 11-May-13 02:39:05

And we're up. Stirring for past 45mins. Tried to ignore her in the vain hope she'd go bak to sleep it instead just stretched out how long we were both awake before feeding.

Wing it's just so frustrating going backwards isn't it? A few weeks. Ago we were going 4-5hrs & now it's 3 max. Can't see that there's anything I can do about it either.

StormyBrid Sat 11-May-13 03:18:19

Can I just say, I really bloody hate insomnia? DD had her dream feed at 1am, not woken yet for the 3am which I'm on duty for, I know full well I'll wake up when she cries for it, yet I can't sleep. Argh!

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