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October 2012: onwards, upwards and rolling over?

(1000 Posts)
YompingJo Sun 20-Jan-13 22:01:28

Is this part 5 already? Where did that time go?

Orenishii Tue 22-Jan-13 11:05:52

I also think, for first timers doing it, you can't escape an element of fear because you've no idea what birth will be like or what will happen.

But next time around, I do hope to try and turn all that fear and experience of pain into something to embrace. I guess i also sorta think there's no point fighting it either?

Angelico Tue 22-Jan-13 11:07:57

Mostly marking place but a quick hug for Squid - so sorry about your gran thanks It does sound like she had a really good long life and was well looked after at the end.

And also in throes of 4 month sleep regression here and I'm so tired I can hardly function. She didn't fall asleep till 01:00, then up at 01:49 to feed, then fed again 05:15. Had a longer sleep then till tennish but fucking white noise on radio kept waking me. She's sleeping again now while I look out at the snow (better late than never) and wonder how the hell I'm going to get out of the drive confused I need coffee and then I'm going to wake her and try and get things started.

How long can this last??? It's like being back at when she was 6 or 7 weeks old only then I was at least used to sleep deprivation. It's the shock of having had normal-ish sleep and now it being gone again that's making us stagger round like zombies confused She's feeding more than usual but then gets more windy than usual too so it's a doubled edged sword. I'm also wondering am I actually making enough milk.

<crawls off on hands and knees towards coffee maker>

Angelico Tue 22-Jan-13 11:09:02

And I'm 35, currently going on 95...

squidkid Tue 22-Jan-13 11:09:47

Thank you all for thoughts about my gran. She had a big family and a good life and death, so I am not upset - just strange, and sad for my dad mostly.

Jess slept like an angel last night, as if knowing I needed it. I love her.

I thought the hypnobirthing was useless at the time because I was expecting it to help with the pain? (Which it didn't.) But - I never ever felt like anything bad was going to happen to me or the baby and I felt safe - so perhaps it helped with the fear? I felt I was out of control, so it was extremely cathartic and helpful to read my medical notes, which one of the midwives left at my house accidentally one time. It repeated time and time again, right till the end: "Coping well." I know some people would find it upsetting that a midwife claimed they were coping when they felt they weren't, but actually I found it really good to read.
Also apparently midwife told my boyfriend when he helped her back to her car with her kit, that it had been a really hard labour and she would have transferred most women but I was managing very well so she didn't (boyfriend didn't think to tell me this for a couple of weeks!)
(Cannot underestimate the power of good support though. I sent my midwife a lengthy thank you letter. And have been lavishing boyfriend and best mate with presents ever since!! Boyfriend did particularly well, he is quite squeamish and likes to sort things out, and watching your girlfriend in labour you must feel pretty useless. He just kept telling me I was doing amazingly.)
So even though I felt like hypnobirthing was useless - who knows how much it actually helped. I certainly did a lot of breathing!! red angry fucking light
Though, unlike orenisshi and londonmrss, my labour didn't go "wrong", it was just so fucking hard, so maybe it is unhelpful for interventions etc.
I do have a friend who planned a home birth and ended up with an unsuccessful induction and c-sec at 43+4(!!) - she said hypnobirthing helped her, on the table, having her section - to accept it.
I don't know.

Orenishii Tue 22-Jan-13 11:11:11

Am in deep denial of 4 month sleep regression. Hugs to everyone going through it. Two things:


Angelico Tue 22-Jan-13 11:17:23

Londonmrs just read your feedback and it gave me a much needed laugh grin

squidkid Tue 22-Jan-13 11:25:21

lisbeth wise words, about lonely mums of teenagers. I am determined to at least keep one foot in my career even if I have another kid etc - it is so tough to re-train if you are out for over 2 years. Lovely dress, I like the one with pockets on that site too - but hand washing is not for me grin
olives I'd have kicked your DH!!!
woolybobs DH - that's more like it!!

So much sympathy for the poor sleep. We've had it for around a week (still not bad by most people's standards) - but last night was fine. Maybe some of them will be short-lived????

Right me and Jess are going out. Fuck the snow!

FjordMor Tue 22-Jan-13 11:40:08

Marking place...

crazypaving Tue 22-Jan-13 12:01:43

anyone know if it's normal for a 15w old baby to feed 4 times in 24hrs? surely this can't be enough to keep him alive, let alone growing???

Londonmrss Tue 22-Jan-13 12:18:43

crazy, are they decent feeds when you have them? ours are still difficult. we're on about 5 in 24 hours, but have enough wet nappies so assume she's feeding efficiently when she does feed. still very hit and miss tough and every day she's refusing to feed at all until after 10am and is refusing the last feed of the day too.

Londonmrss Tue 22-Jan-13 12:28:50

by the way, if anyone sees my sex drive can you please tell it to come back home to me? it will be welcomed with open arms and legs

Londonmrss Tue 22-Jan-13 12:36:02

oh god for a second I thought I'd accidentally put that last post as my status on facebook instead of on here... phew.

crazypaving Tue 22-Jan-13 13:12:05

LondonMrs grin grin that would be quite a status.

the feeds are pretty big but seriously, 4 a day? it's around 10am, 3pm, midnight and 4am atm. how can he be ok with that amount of sustenance??

CookieMonster88 Tue 22-Jan-13 13:36:03

Squid, so sorry to hear about your nan, we lost my grandad last year and I know what you mean about not being upset, I was more sad for my Dad as they were so close having always worked together on the family farm.

Who ever mentioned Wonder Weeks a few days ago THANK YOU. It helps so much with understanding what DD is up to at the moment, think we are in the throw of the 12 week development phase. Hence the rubbish sleep and extra clinginess. Also got some good ideas for simple entertainment.

Even more snow here hmm made it to baby group but there were only 4 of us there, at least it got us out the house. DH got stuck in a snow drift last night, made the evening very long as my help wasn't there hmm feel for those who have partners who regularly go away.

lisbethsopposite Tue 22-Jan-13 13:55:08

Catching up on phone so I'll post as I go along.
London guess they wont be using you under 'Testimonials'. grin
huffle smiley Awake here last night at 11-12, 1.30-2, 3.30-4... lost track here.
Anyway in bed with baby now after 2 panadol for tired headache. Ds1 asleep.
Also glad so many others are having same experience! Misery needs company.
Found a stretchy swaddle sheet in Heatons so fingers crossed.

FirstTimeForEverything Tue 22-Jan-13 13:59:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lisbethsopposite Tue 22-Jan-13 14:06:31

wooly Dh sounds fab . We need a word for an empathetic intuitive partner - opposite of nobber. confused
elpis a mini break to Paris. That sounds soo wonderful. envy Please let us know how it goes.

Cherrychopsticks Tue 22-Jan-13 14:13:40

grin London, much more interesting than the usual shite dreary statuses!
And I'd totally forgotten about the hypnobollocks, been meaning to ask you all how it went?

Feel for you all stuck inside with the snow, I've not had any plans for 2 days and I'm officially bored out my brain and in a foul mood. But the rest of the week is non-stop, trekking all over the place so I'll probably be complaining about that in a few days.

lisbeth tired headaches are the worst sad, hope you get a good nap today. You too, Huffle (and anyone else who had a crap night).

The new school year starts in April here (when I'll go back to work) so preparations/schedules/planning etc starting now. I don't even want to think about it. I do love my job, but am seriously lacking in motivation at the moment.

lisbethsopposite Tue 22-Jan-13 14:20:12

Eek firsttime you are scaring me.
Paul is 17 weeks today and also on 75 centile when measured weeks ago. There the sameness ends. He feeds umpteen times a day and recently every 90 mins at night.
My new swaddle will fix all <hope emoticon>

Londonmrss Tue 22-Jan-13 14:21:09

crazy does lo seem otherwise healthy? how many wet nappies? that's what I'm keeping my eye on through this difficult feeding phase. kellymom has a calculator to work out how much a breastfeed baby needs per feed based on how often they fed and if you can guess how fast your milk flows based on pumping or can give you an idea (obviously not accurate though). really its best to look at the whole picture. it's he alert and happy the rest of the time? enough wet nappies?
I'm struggling emotionally still with the feeding issues. when she feeds nicely is lovely but at least still twice a day she rejects- in a way that suggests I'm abusing her in some way. today she refused a feed by instead puking on me. it's a phase, its a phase.

FirstTimeForEverything Tue 22-Jan-13 14:25:19

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lisbethsopposite Tue 22-Jan-13 14:48:59

I'll be very nice when you are done in and my fella settles (probably). grin

WantAnOrange Tue 22-Jan-13 14:58:47

Squid sorry to hear about your Gran passing but 91, thats amazing! I hope I make it to 91.

DD did not go to sleep last night. I swear I fed her for 12 hours straight. What the bloody hell is going on?! I had to finish an essay today and only managed to get it done by feeding with one arm and typing with the other. I'm so tired.

Am waiting for dishwasher to arrive that was supposed to be delivered on friday, hoping it will make life a little easier.

funchum8am Tue 22-Jan-13 15:22:44

lisbeth woolly huddle and all others in sleep deprivation hell I share your pain. babyfunch has never slept well karma because I used to believe parents were to blame for difficult offspring but am dying on my arse here, trying to instruct a plumber fixing our shower but just gibbering at him. Thankfully babyfunch is asleep for now (just at a time I can't be!)

cherry what do you teach? English? I got my new timetable yesterday - I will be teaching a real mix of things which are new to me! But I haven't got any exam groups so my falling asleep in lessons won't cause anyone to fail their A levels grin

Babyfunch's cot is arriving today too, so more flat pack for us to wrestle with.

Love the idea of a term meaning the opposite of nobber to apply to DHs who are behaving...any suggestions??

Woolybob Tue 22-Jan-13 15:52:46

How about rebbon? A backwards nobber! Yes he's a good 'un, but also owes me for letting him go snowboarding for the week! Actually trying to think.of things I used to do has made me realise that I could actually do a lot of them now with baby in tow and am just being a bit useless. So NY resolution to be more proactive!

squid I remember when my dad's mum died a few years ago - felt the same, it was my dad I felt for, especially when his cousin came up to hom at the funeral and pointed out that they were 'the older generation now'! Also my nan had a massive thing about noone knowing her age and had made my dad swear not to reveal it. However the undertakers put a plaque on her coffin that said died x aged x. As they lowered it into the grave and we all saw it you could just feel all my immediate family thinking 'oh shit, she's coming back to haunt us' and not daring to make eye contact with each other. So far so good though grin .

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