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Dec 08 Mums - Onwards and bloody well upwards!

(996 Posts)
Beans36 Mon 15-Oct-12 19:17:44

How's this? Thought I'd just press on with it!

DeidreBarlow Mon 10-Dec-12 12:40:56

Hello All,

Firstly big fat HAPPY BIRTHDAYS to all those I have missed, including the grown ups! Vag Happy big 4-0! Hope you enjoyed Barcelona? I went there for my Hen Do!

Beans the test thing is a bit odd, although I wouldn't know much about it. Was the test you just did a cheapo?

Spot I have done loads of reading on 'pre-school' boys...obviously given DS and his bad temper. I did read a really good article which was pretty reassuring about their anger/temper...I'll see if I can find it. It was very American, but still good. Yes, boys do have a testosterone surge around this age (when will DS's ever stop....) which accounts for lots. But I think they are just generally pushing boundaries and exploring what is and isn't acceptable. DS certainly is! The hardest part is trying not to react with our own anger/frustration. Which is virtually impossible for me at times with DS. But with DS he really has seemed to be respond to me the more I react to his bad behaviour in a calm way. I try to ask DS what makes him cross, which most of the time is a waste of time, but occasionally he will tell me he is cross because of x, y z...and at least then we can talk about why he shouldn't hit/push or whatever.

Actually, when I think back DD wasn't aggressive at 4 but bloody hell she was moody, and wouldn't listen and would sulk if she couldn't get her own way, refused to go to bed. In fact if I searched back through our old threads I do remember once saying she was really hard to be around...while DS was all cuteness and lovable at 2. Ha ha...oh my how they change!!

I guess what I am trying to get at (and I really should listen to my own advice) is that this is just a phase, and they will come through the other side. Until they do we have wine and each other to get us through.

ZJ Do let us know how DH gets on,am thinking of you x

jam How was the wedding?

kayz Sorry the sleep still ain't will one day!

Indith Thanks for the haircut reminder. I have just booked me and DD in for the end of the week, she can barely see through her fringe, and I am starting to frizz out with split ends. Whatever happened to the days I used to go every 6 weeks, and have beautiful products to put on my hair? Oh yes children! Nowadays the elastic band is my best friend, and hats in this chilly weathergrin

ShadyLadyT Mon 10-Dec-12 14:27:48

Hello me dears

Just wanted to say to ZJ that I am thinking of you and your DH today.

Happy belated birthday, Vag, there was a lovely picture on FB of you and your DH. 40 is actually ok!

Happy happy Birthday to Ben (need to check the list for t'others) Rubes, it was so lovely to have you all and it put us in a really jolly and festive mood!

Wish I could have everybody! Seriously, if anyone fancies a weekend in a Cotswolds madhouse....

Beans, re: coffee - trying cutting decaff with caff, half and half. I do this anyway, now (apart from the very first one of the day!) Booze - well, to be honest I did have the odd one when I fancied. But not much. Also, I think if you do drink a glass of wine, have a soft drink next to it and make sure you drink both. I would much rather have wine and sparkling water in separate glasses, than a spritzer, but it must come to the same in your tummy....

Lots more to say to lots more people but in the middle of all sorts so will be back in a few hours. I have just drunk about a gallon of homemade gazpacho, all to myself. I know there are worse things to gorge on but it was way too much.

Beans36 Mon 10-Dec-12 20:18:15

I'm pretty sure I'm not pregnant. Not sure why, just don't think I am. I also thought I'd started my period on Monday, so I took a pill. Had forgotten that! It was actually my bleeding bottom! That maybe could have an effect on the pregnancy test, could it???

Oh god sorry, I'm so boring.

ArtigeneAuberchoke Mon 10-Dec-12 21:37:29

Gosh Beans, how confusing. Did your DH bring you another test? I'd wait abs take it with concentrated urine in the morning. Could your second test have been negative due to very dilute wee? I dont think that a false positive is possible. How does the idea of not being pregnant make you feel?

Beans36 Mon 10-Dec-12 21:50:38

DH not home til midnight. He's hoping boots still open when he leaves work!

If I'm not pregnant. Hmmm. Is it bad to say slightly relieved? But if I am, I will adjust and become happy about it. It's just a lot to take in/on after the last few months and am a bit overwhelmed by everything. Feel like life is coming together now, and a baby would throw it all back into disarray! I'm a control freak! I feel so ungrateful saying that. Sorry.

ZJ, any news from DH? X

ZuleikaJambiere Mon 10-Dec-12 22:17:14

All good with DH - phew. He spent 3 hours at the hospital today and Dr is fairly certain it's just a knock or bruise or something. Anyways, it's on a tube, not his testicle. He's been told to keep an eye on it, but it should go away. smile

How very odd Beans, I'm also sure I've heard you can't get a false positive, but can get false negatives (in fact I did with DD1 for 2 weeks!) But whatever the outcome, I believe that it will have happened for a reason that will reveal itself in due course

I've found the list - it's Phoebe's birthday tomorrow, I knew there was someone other than Ben! If Trace is lurking, very happy birthday to Phoebs. And I hope Ben has had a marvellous day today

Bed is calling, night everyone

Rubena Mon 10-Dec-12 23:36:26

Thanks for ds b'day wishes. He had a great day - cannot believe he's 4. Am shattered so brief one! lady it was fab! And hope we get to see u all soon again!
Beans, odd. Dh just said if you were on the thresh hold of test working time but hydration at time or numerous other factors could result in second test being false neg if very close after, therefore re-test as good chance you are still pregnant, - or, could possibly have been that you tested early and were preg then miscarried as many people do but don't actually ever know about, and you may have unfortunately caught and realised a positive result which was only the case briefly. Then went on to say most people get preg many times more than the first but the body miscarries before they Ever know and is very common.
I hope whatever the result, it is what you want x
Brilliant news ZJ x

sybilfaulty Tue 11-Dec-12 08:25:31

Great news ZJ. You must be so relieved.

Beans my lovely, the test is looking for a hormone in your wee which is only present on pregnancy (HCG). This means that a false positive isn't possible. The hormone isnt in the pill so that wouldn't have skewed things.

Hope you have now done ano test and got an answer one way or the other smile

sybilfaulty Tue 11-Dec-12 08:26:49

I was advised by a pharmacist that, whatever the test says, you should use first morning wee. That was it is the most concentrated and most likely to be correct. Good luck darling.

McKayz Tue 11-Dec-12 09:18:51

ZJ, that is wonderful news.

Beans, I am pretty sure that it is impossible to get a false positive.

I am feeling like crap this morning. DD isn't sleeping unless she's in our bed, but then I don't sleep. Plus I have this cough that won't go away so I spend all night coughing. I can't stop bloody crying because I am so exhausted.

I might take a break from MN until I'm not so bloody miserible sad

Honsandrevels Tue 11-Dec-12 10:29:22

ZJ That's fantastic news! I'm so relieved for you. Hurrah.

Beans Agree with others. Either a duff second test or v early miscarriage. Did your dh manage to get a test?

Kayz No need for a break. That's what we're here for.

Vag I don't think I wished you a happy birthday. Happy birthday to you Ben, Phoebe and others I've missed!

Honsandrevels Tue 11-Dec-12 10:34:47

Sorry beans that reads a bit bluntly. I think mixed emotions are there for any pregnancy test so either way it feels like something has shifted. Actually I'm not explaining myself well at all. J hasn't slept properly again. I'll blame that.

ShadyLadyT Tue 11-Dec-12 11:37:06

Hello girls! Going to do a big fat catch up but just before I get settled -

BIG PHEWFS for you and your DH, ZJ. Oh man, what a relief for you.

Kayz - don't worry about moaning on here. It sounds so tough. Lack of/interrupted sleep is SO VILE and to be really honest it is one of the things that is putting me off going off a DC3 (not trying to rub it in, hope that doesn't sound too tactless!). You must be really dragging yourself around. Can you go to the docs about the cough? Have you got the right linctus for it? I do know that codeine is a cough supressant but it depends what sort of cough it is
- I am obviously hesitant about the codeine thing as I am not a doctor grin The only thing to say is that it WILL pass. Be kind to yourself!

Beans - hope it works out for you either way. If you are preggers, you will deffo come round to the idea. I was quite cheesed off when I found out I was up duffed with DD2 cos I felt it wasn't the right time but in the event, it all worked out perfectly and I wouldn't change a thing now. I think a lot of people will have similar stories to this.

Right, coffee and proper catch up!

ShadyLadyT Tue 11-Dec-12 11:41:49

Just spoken to my stepmother, we have arranged her Christmas visit. I am so glad. One positive thing to come out of losing my Dad is that I have a much closer relationship with his wife and it has made me feel like I am doing something for him as well, by making an effort with her. My sister hasn't bothered and it does make me annoyed. Her excuse is that she is too shy and finds it too hard. She is forty ucking six! But maybe I am being harsh.

spotofcheerfulness Tue 11-Dec-12 15:04:20

That's really nice about your step mum,*Lady*. Is she on her own? Sounds like a weird excuse from your sister. Could understand strangers, but family? Odd.

Beans I'm glad you seem to be kind of ok with whatever happens. Are you going to keep testing or go to GP?

ZJ that is ace news about your DH. What a relief for you both.

Kayz, sorry you're feeling so rough, the sleep deprivation makes you all the more run down and more likely for the illnesses to stick around sad. I hear ya on the co-sleeping. B sleeps a treat in our bed. Me and DP - not a wink.

THanks all for the thoughts about T's behaviour. I agree, it's probably an age/testosterone thing. I just find it hard not to wallop him back when he's being mean to B. Nothing seems to change it either- neither punishments nor rewards, nor explaining makes an iota of difference. He just goes and does the same thing again.

Our house is a bit chaotic at the moment - builders working on the bathroom all the time, and boiler packed in so electric heaters in the kids rooms at night, but nothing in ours. Got my birthday on Fri (not that I'm doing owt for it) then T's party on Sat and somehow got to paint the bathroom before then. And hopefully boiler will be fixed before party.

On that subject, any ideas for party games for seven 4 year-old boys in a very small house? So far we only have pass the parcel, musical statues and Simon Says.

Honsandrevels Tue 11-Dec-12 15:13:13

Spot We had dd's party on Saturday, a week early. We did the ones you mentioned plus musical bumps and sleeping lions. They did general dancing, chased balloons about and we did a few songs like sleeping bunnies.

spotofcheerfulness Tue 11-Dec-12 15:46:54

Ooh, what's sleeping lions, Hons? Does it involve them all being silent for half an hour? <hopeful>

ShadyLadyT Tue 11-Dec-12 15:52:17

I haven't come back for my proper catch up but just wanted to say, Spot, at our local Halloween party, there was a brilliant game where the kids lay still and silent for what seemed like an age, with a choccy button balanced on their noses...must find out the rules...

spotofcheerfulness Tue 11-Dec-12 15:56:50

That sounds amazing Lady. Please find out!

JamInMyWellies Tue 11-Dec-12 15:59:26

Spot buy stuff to make their own pizzas. My 2 love doing this. Pizza bases dirt cheap at tescos.

ZJ am delighted to hear that all is ok with your DH.

Beans gosh what a rollercoaster. I hope that whatever the outcome is you are happy.

Kayz many sympathies on the sleep deprivation.

Well what a great day yesterday. Such a brill wedding. Not so great was DS1 projectile vomiting in the beautiful hotel suite and then having to clear it up at 5.30am when I am was in that still a bit drunk but getting a hangover too. Then we got in the car to leave at lunchtime and it's broken so have to call out the AA. But none if that can dampen what was a fantastic couple of days.

Honsandrevels Tue 11-Dec-12 16:02:18

Yup sleeping lions involves lying down and being very still! The winner is the one who keeps still the longest but obviously ignore them moving and spin it out for as long as possible.

Beans36 Tue 11-Dec-12 16:26:59

ZJ - HURRAH! I'm so glad that it is just a bruise. What a relief!

Rubes - your DH was right, I think I am having an early MC as I have started my period today a week late! But am actually fine with it. In some ways, it's a bit of a relief as my initial reaction wasn't unadulterated joy, but "oh shit". I'm sorry if that sounds flippant, it's really not meant to be. But it also made me really think long and hard about whether I do want another one and I'm not as averse to it as I thought. If it does happen, I will embrace it! If it doesn't, then it's ok too. If you see what I mean. I'm fairly chilled either way. Does that sound faffy? Probably, but I am!

Just spent a wonderful day in Cambs with my sister. God I love her so much. We wept at lunch together, which was rather smashing. Wagamamas. Lovely. Our older sister couldn't make it, which was no bad thing as she's slightly wrapped up in herself at the moment and it makes it tough when all we talk about is her misery and/or her children! That sounds harsh, doesn't it? And I'm sorry. But it's been going on for sooooooo long! Apparently Mum had to remind her she was meant to be coming anyway! Never mind.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ALL THE TINIES! Although really not tiny any more.

DD1 went to the pantomime today and Poi off Show Me Show Me was Jack in Jack and the Beanstalk. She was so excited! I love that her school does that!

Kayz - chin up, my darling. We're here to hear you if you need to.

Lady - that's such a lovely turn out for you and your step mother. So nice to have a good come out of a bad.


ShadyLadyT Tue 11-Dec-12 17:35:45

Right, am back.

Beans - I am such a fatalist about these things, maybe it wasn't the right time. That sounds like a lovely day though (and I could inhale a plate of Wagamama noodles at the moment...mmmm. I always get ravenous in the days following ovulation, I have noticed. Always coincides with sore tits etc, the whole PMT thing I guess. I even ate a few Maltesers today and I am so not interested in choc or sweets normally). When's the ECG?

Jam - so glad the wedding was a blast, meant to say that I hoped it was (before you actually went grin) I got all confused and thought the wedding was back in NY. How is DS1 now?

Speaking of sickies, how are you KP?

I did smile about rabies, Hons. Gosh, the things they say. DD1 said to me the other day "Are Daddy's pants square because he has got a different shaped bum?"

Oh, and she changed DD2's nappy yesterday hmm I thought they were quiet. She'd done quite well until she'd decided to get DD2 to do the remainder on the potty, and DD2 had dropped random nuggets of poo on the floor on the way from her very dirty bum. Ugh. Not fun to clean that lot up!

Vag, are you STILL in Barca? Waaaaah, I want to be there.

Spot - to go back to T's tempers, with bad behaviour generally I think the best advice is to stay calm and icy when they misbehave and praise ANY good behaviour like mad.

Oooh, hang on just let me post this.

ShadyLadyT Tue 11-Dec-12 17:45:50

Indith, has the quiz happened yet? I do love a good quiz and get wildly competitive (I am not that competitive in life, only quizzes, which I do play to win)

Arti, how are you? Poor little DD2, it's horrible when they worry. Do you think you reassured her? And how hilarious that the author of that study was near you in the coffee shop grin Only in London town.

Girls, I am London town tomorrow and will be at Winter Wonderland in the afternoon should anyone feel like braving the cold. I know Rubes can't make it and SL, I think you said the Weds was no good for you. I will be there from 1.30ish I guess.

Are we shelving our London meet up until the New Year?

ShadyLadyT Tue 11-Dec-12 23:55:07

Nooooooooooo I've killed the thread!

I was falling asleep at ten but had to wake myself up to do a pitch which had to be in for tomorrow. Out of interest, does anyone on here watch Inspector Montalbano?

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