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These babies are going to be calm, easy and sleepy at all the right times, and we're brooking no argument about it!

(1000 Posts)
Biscuitsandtea Sun 07-Oct-12 05:09:09

In here ladies - the other thread was getting full up so I thought I'd better start a new one.....

Will do some links to / from this thread but in the meantime please make yourselves at home smile

<plumps up cushions and sets out a tray of cakes, pastries and tea and coffee>

Biscuitsandtea Sun 07-Oct-12 05:14:57

A link to the old thread

Also I've reported my stupid autocorrect typo in the title - hopefully they'll fix it for me <fat fingers>

hawthers Sun 07-Oct-12 06:40:37

Morning all!

Was going to rant away about yesterdays issues but not sure am keen for the gory details to go on page 1 of the new thread. Basically DS1 is in the 'wrong' school year for his due date as he was 9 weeks prem. We're bloody lucky that he's not got any major health problems but he is small for his age and is now lumped in with kids who are turning 4 when he has only just turned 3.

The bday party just seemed to highlight all the issues. It felt like all the other kids were playing together and DS1 was just doing his own thing not actually playing with the others. DH gets really down about it all and is such hard work when I'm having to reassure him about it all the time at the same time that I'm worried too.

It's also really early days re preschool but i guess we're both worried that he won't have any friends as socially and emotionally he is that bit younger than them.

Hmm looks like I have just ranged in page 1. Arse

hawthers Sun 07-Oct-12 06:52:37

And we have to see one if dh's friends today who is possibly the least perceptive person I've ever met. They have a 2 yo who is prob bigger that DS1 and really just doesn't seem to understand that its not funny they are the same size, its totally depressing.

There is more but I can't face typing it al out. Sorry to bring the mood down first thing on Sunday.

ScreamIfYouWantToGoFaster Sun 07-Oct-12 06:55:48

Oooooo, nice new thread Biscuits! <drags chair over to cakes & pastries table, starts to inhale all the delicious carbs!> Sorry, I'm back on the Paleo diet and soooooo missing carbs right now! blush

My milk is drying up again, same as it did when I tried this diet after DD reached 8 wo. I think my bfing will have ended completely within the next week or so, it certainly won't survive the full 30 day diet. That takes me to almost the 6 month mark that I was aiming for, so I'm happy with that.

Biscuits yaDNbu! I understand why your DH might be a bit sad at DS2 preferring you to him, but he's only 6 mo and the only way to resolve the situation is for your DH to spend MORE time with DS2, not less. DD did this to my DH a couple of months ago. It wasn't anything to do with absence in our case, instead it was because DH was ignoring her cues and just "settling" her in whatever way was most convenient for him. So he would mainly just sit in bed dozing and holding her still against him while she cried. Naturally DD preferred to be settled by me, simply because I was willing to get up, walk around, rock, sing, etc until she was happy. DH's first response was to try and make me responsible for all the nightshifts, however this idea received short shrift from me. Instead I made DH do 50% of every night including work nights (previously I was doing his work nights) and when he knew he HAD to get her to sleep because he couldn't just nap the following day he became more willing to follow my advice and get off his ass when she needed soothing!

Of course although this technique worked, and she now settles for us both so I've gone back to doing most nights, there is still alot of resentment from DH for my choice of solution... Given the state of my relationship right now I'm certainly not suggesting you should do the same as me! That's enough whinging from me anyway, I'm enjoying being at my parents' house right now, and DH is already making more effort. He took DD to his friend's house today while I was practising her naming cake. Then he brought her home (on time! shock) and I managed to get him to feed her some purée and broccoli (she LOVES broccoli hmm) before doing her bedtime routine - bath, massage, etc - while I cleared up. It worked like a dream and DD actually went to sleep for him perfectly on cue by 8 o'clock. We were then able to sneak out to the cinema together leaving my Mum with the baby monitor. We NEVER had nights like this at home. DH seems to be finally putting some real effort in! Which is lovely.

Sorry! I'm ridiculously me me me today! I hope everyone else has had a good night - Dream? Pomme? Hawthers? How is all the potty-training going for those in the middle of it? Also, I'm probably just having a baby brain moment, but has Pet been around? On my phone so I can't check back. I hope all is well.

Still No Brooking like billy-o for Fluffy in case she's mid sneeze!

PrincessPumpkinshoutsBOO Sun 07-Oct-12 07:21:57

<slumps on cushion, helps self to pastry> Biscuits I like what not have done with the place, I think we will be very happy here smile

Brooking for Fluff hoping for a lovely sneeze!

ScreamIfYouWantToGoFaster Sun 07-Oct-12 07:46:37

Sorry I x-posted with Hawthers earlier, and then had to run away for a leaky nappy followed by poo explosion double whammy! confused

Hawthers the DS1 situation sounds really stressful sad I remember you posting a few months ago about trying to get the local authority to accept DS1 into the appropriate school year for his corrected age. What a nightmare. Sending lots of hugs your way. I truly believe kids, even really young ones, are so much stronger than we give them credit for. He's your PFB and it makes perfect sense that you're worried, but I'm sure he'll make friends soon, and in the blink of an eye he'll be older and totally caught up with his peers. Just the fact that you're looking out for him and fighting his corner will give him the strength he needs to overcome the challenges facing him. (((hugs)))

<Waves to Boo>

Biscuitsandtea Sun 07-Oct-12 08:21:50

Hmm Hawthers that must be v stressful indeed. Did you get anywhere with the local authority with regards to him not perhaps starting school until the following year?

I also feel I have to confess that I could be that other parent with a big child blushsad. I bet we have frequently discussed with our friends how big ds1 is blush. He is freakishly tall for his age though and is almost as tall as one of our friend's sons who is in year 1 already. I have never really considered that it might be worrying someone that their child is smaller blush. I suppose we have the opposite issue though of a child who is tall and the oldest in the year so he'll stand out that way.

The playing together thing is interesting as this was highlighted for ds1 at the end of last year at pre-school (as in that he didn't play with the others, just did his own thing mainly). Then just last week one of the ladies said that she and his key worker had been discussing how nice it was to see him playing with the others and instigating play etc. and he was just 4 the other week. I do find it amazing that a few weeks older and he could have been at school. However, I think he would have been ok if he was at school. His writing isn't as good as plenty of others who would have started school (but maybe I've not worried about it too much knowing I had another whole year) but his phonics / letter recognition etc i would guess would be good enough if he were starting school. I have a friend who's little girl has just turned 4 and started school this September and she is doing fine and really enjoying it.

I suppose if you've asked the local authority then either they could agree to put him in the following year, or if they won't would it be worth talking to the pre-school and explaining where your concerns lie? They may be able to try and help him along in some areas? I know they can't make him taller but in the other areas they might be able to help? Also keep in mind that if he has only just started at the pre-school then he would have to settle in still. It will take him a while to get used to the other children etc and know how it all works.

Biscuitsandtea Sun 07-Oct-12 08:27:31

Interesting Scream that your DH has done almost the same thing. In DH's defence when I told him about my night and he said 'oh I wish there was something I could have done' hmm I did point out that he could have got up when I asked him and he was / is mortified at not having helped. So that's another thing he owes me for grin <adds to the list with 'going to a meeting on holiday'>

DreamingOfPeace Sun 07-Oct-12 08:55:01

Fuckity fuck fuck fuck. Dh has the squits. DD has a temperature of 38.1 and cough please, please don't get the squits both boys still got the runs just as bad as ever plus the coughs/colds. I will probably start antibiotics today for this boob. S nappy rash worse again today smile

too, thY post sounded wrong, I need teaching to suck eggs with my own!! Genuinely, its so hard to be objective with you PFB own child. Was happy to read it thanks DD walked at 10.5 months but only learnt to crawl at 22 months, and was all a bit wierd- anyone remember me saying she used to hold herself rigid and fall over like a plank?! I got advice from one of my colleagues for her then, exercise sheets and all smile It's other things she does biscuits like crawl under the babies baby gym, then try and stand up, get stuck under the arches and be stuck hmm . So you have to say to her ' bend your knees, hands down, crawl out'. So i know she can bend down and crawl, but her motor planning is a bit rubbish so she needs help working out what to do iykwim. And little things, like her bilateral coordination, like eating a yoghurt- she just wouldn't know to hold the pot with the other hand, she just chases it round with the spoon.... Lots of it is, as you say, stuff other people would probably not even notice as its not their job!!! I don't think her speech is very delayed now, I'm just a bit sensitive due to the delays with her cousins and uncle. Gah, just a worrier about my PFB!!!!

No time to reply to you yet hawthers, sorry more shitty nappies

pommedechocolat Sun 07-Oct-12 08:57:25

That's great news about you and dh scream and great that you're getting out.

scarlet - she's two and 6 months. She seems to be just slightly short of being able to tell me why she's stopped using the potty for poos. She tells me she knows she should poo poo in her potty but will just say 'yes' to any explanation I offer rather than giving me one of her own.

She's still doing it - two yesterday <boak>

Dh and A are really starting to build their own thing now (at 7 months 1week). I love watching it as she was always my baby for the first early months and he spent all his time with dd1. Hmm this may be the reason for dd1's poo issues....

TheLittleFriend Sun 07-Oct-12 09:16:18

Thanks for the link here biscuits, thought I'd come and say hi
<waves to everyone>

pomme are you seriously saying Abbie is 7 months? That means First-Born-Brooking-Baby-Farley is even older <faints>

I hope you're all well and all babies are fine (though it sounds like you've got it tough with illness ATM dream)

Well I'm 20weeks preg and have found out that we're having a ds this time smile I'm feeling so excited and can't wait to be joining here some time around 21st feb grin xx

pommedechocolat Sun 07-Oct-12 09:37:48

friend - congratulations!!! I'd missed that totally, half way through and a boy! Brilliant! Hope you're feeling well and rested etc.

Yes, seven months in here. Mental isn't it?!

hawthers Sun 07-Oct-12 10:46:36

Ooh little ds' rock! (as I'm sure dds do too)

Farley is 9 months old, crawling still not sleeping through the night reliably and busy being a total dude! Look forward to seeing you here in the new year x

scarletfingernail Sun 07-Oct-12 11:07:12

Meant to say yesterday, well done your DDs Scream and pomme on the improved sleep.

Hawthers sorry to hear your worries re DS1. I guess there's not much anyone can say to make you feel better about it as you will probably always worry about how his early arrival might impact on his future. But I can say there are lots of babies born at term who are behind in their development, my DS included and I have stressed so much in the past about kids the same age developing much quicker. I'm sure as your DS gets older these differences will become far less noticable. It must be upsetting for you if you're worried, you naturally want your DH to reassure you and if it then becomes apparent he's worried as well it can make everything appear much worse.

Thanks for new thread Biscuits. Sorry to hear you're sleep deprived. I admit that I would probably do the same as your DH if it were the middle of the night and toy just want DS back to sleep ASAP. But yes if he spent more time with him in the day this might possibly help to prevent the rejection.

Dream, as always, I'm brooking for you thanks

scarletfingernail Sun 07-Oct-12 11:09:46

Ok, I'm on the FB group now. It's surreal, like some sort of parallel universe where everyone has a normal name grin I can't figure out who everyone is.

Jen/Scream if you get chance click on my photo and tell me if you can only see my profile picture or if the background cover photo is also displayed? If it's not I'll either amend it or get some more pics shared or no one will know what I look like Not a bad thing really though

pommedechocolat Sun 07-Oct-12 11:13:30

Chicken Pox!!!!!! Explains some things around here....

Am undecided on the Facebook group....

Is aubers on the fb page??!

scarletfingernail Sun 07-Oct-12 11:32:48

pomme I really hope that is the explanation for the poo. She'll have been coming down with that for over a week wouldn't she? Poor little sausage, how is she? Did you get the spots checked by a doctor or did you recognise it yourself? I've no idea what they look like and my DC have not yet had them. I'd hate to take them to GP and then it turned out to be that.

Re the FB thing. I know what you mean. I've just had a good look through all my FB stuff and there's no mention of the group on it. Likewise I don't think anyone from the group can see anything about me unless it's already open to public viewing, which mine shouldn't be. It's nice to be able to put names to faces (the ones that I've so far managed to figure out) and it's easier to share photos than uploading them on here. I tend to only have family and close friends on FB. Many of them live miles from us so it's nice to be able to put pics on of the DC, but for that reason I keep my friends list short.

ReturnOfTheMunx Sun 07-Oct-12 11:33:26

MArking place sorry for lack of posts I am not very good at one handed typing yet and ds is always feeding

NinjaChipmunk Sun 07-Oct-12 11:48:43

oh pomme chicken pox sucks a big one. You prob already know but calomine cream is easier than calomine lotion. Bicarb in the bath is soothing too.

hawthers that sounds difficult and I really feel for you, especially when it gets highlighted like that. Even if he does not get moved a year then the teachers will be well used to looking after the younger ones in the year. And also they change so much so quickly at this age. The things he'll be doing at 3.5 and 4 are really quite different to the things they do at three and being with his peers will really help him learn these things.

lovely to see little and boo on here, looking forward to you all coming over permanently. And congrats on your ds little, boys rock! (well all kids do but boys are so much fun).

scream really nice to hear you and dh are getting on so well, long may it continue and you get to have some nice romantic nights out together.

dream sigh. You really need the world to cut you some slack. This too shall strong.

I am debating my halloween name at the mo. What do you think of NinjaChipmunksVampireTeeth? Thats all I can think of so far...

I need to post more regularly, so very sorry for missing lots that has been going on. I had to take ds to a&e on friday after the school called me to pick him up. Silly boy had shoved a piece of a straw up his nose and couldn't get it out. A&e couldn't either so he's now been referred to another hospital who have a clinic for this type of thing and if they can't retrieve it easily they will have to give him a general anaesthetic to get it out sad Poor boy was quite distressed. He seems ok since though. How is everyone, I know i've missed loads of you. Might see you on fb when fluff gets a chance to friend me. I mean honestly, anyone would think she has better things to do grin

NinjaChipmunk Sun 07-Oct-12 11:50:15

<shoves a bt of croissant in munx's mouth> Lovely to see you! Hope you are all doing well? How is dd taking to ds?

ReturnOfTheMunx Sun 07-Oct-12 13:22:52

Both are asleep, quick post from me.

Sorry lack of name checking, I do read the thread when feeding but I am not able to post while he is latched on as the movement disrupts him!

Things good here, coming up for 5 weeks. DD is very good but starting to be a bit mischievous when he's feeding and she knows I can't chase her.

He is putting on weight really well, almost 12 oz last week so am feeling more confident about BFing him.

He dribbles milk out of his nose when feeding though?!?! NCT helpline reckons he is struggling with a forceful letdown. And this must be true as if he pulls off I have a jet stream that goes over the cushions blush.

Hope everyone else is ok, sorry to read of poorly DC.

I hope to be a better postgrad brooker and involve myself more soon once things calm down a bit.

pommedechocolat Sun 07-Oct-12 13:50:10

scarlet - A year ago all her little friends had it and she had it really mildly (like 7 spots). My friend checked it and said they were chicken pox spots. These look exactly the same and are on the top of her torso following the nerve lines.

She seems better today, less tired and whingey than she has been for ages. Just hoping A gets it mildly (shes been really grumpy lately so am presuming she has it). As shes likely to get it again getting it twice harshly seems rubbish!

I've got my first day at work on Thurs and my day is stuffed full of meetings. Think dh will have to take the day off....

pommedechocolat Sun 07-Oct-12 13:51:00

munx - good to see you and glad to hear things are going well. jaggy has some useful advice on fast letdown I think?

jaggythistle Sun 07-Oct-12 18:04:49

marks place at 3rd attempt... back later.

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