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April 2009 Episode 15 Bebe & BB have babies n stuff(815 Posts)
Academic mother of many here, now on antidepressants so a bit coshed chemically.
Despite also having fractured my index finger the other day, I have been pottering around the house decorating the children's rooms and so on, which has been pleasurable and productive, but I am not sure whether staying indoors and barely facing the outside world is healthy tbh. However going out and doing things with three kids in tow seems like too much effort at the moment. I feel shaky just going to the supermarket, although I make a point of trying to appear as normal as possible while I am doing things like this.
I am trying to decide whether to give up work altogether or whether to soldier on. I would not make a very good SAHM really, I think, and I am certainly not prepared to iron my DH's shirts all day long and that sort of thing, but I know I am not happy working long hours for little return and having colleagues being unappreciative and sometimes pretty unpleasant as I do a lot of the grunt work.
It's difficult at the moment.
Now while I am on, I have instructions for BB. PUT YOUR FEET UP AND STOP DOING THINGS! You are far too busy given the twins situation IMO. But then, I suppose you are the woman who tried to give birth in the bathroom aisle of B and Q.
I don't know much about ad's but I imagine it takes a period of adjustment? Hopefully it wont be too long for you.
I can't see you being a 50's housewife either but I am pretty sure that is not how you would use your time. I bet you have a head full of still unwritten books or other such projects that until now you have not had time for??
Hello - well I finish work a week tomorrow but with bank holiday etc I only have 5 more days and I did work all morning from my bed so definitely taking it much easier at the moment.
Bic / Zulu - I am petrified reading your posts. I'd completely forgotten about frequency of night feeds and I am going to have two of them - I am NEVER going to sleep! NEVER EVER!!! However, they seem to be settling a bit which is good. Although Bic your facebook post this morning made me chuckle - I'll be with you soon at 4 in the morning jigging and shhing!!
SW - FWIW and you might not want my two pennies worth but... if it is financially feasible, I think you should give up work. You have not been happy, well since we first met on this thread a long time ago and you are clearly not benefiting from career development there. That compiled with the commute etc just makes it impossible. I think you should become self employed, write your articles and books / concepts and send them off. Build up your portfolio, try and get some regular writing for an industry magazine - anything that will keep you active and passionate in the industry you like and will not put you at risk of becoming a 50s housewife. It should be feasible to have proper 'work hours' while the kids are at school and as long as you and DH agree that you are not the cleaner and ironer it could work out really well for you. I am thinking of retraining in the next couple of years as something completely different to PR and I am really excited about it but it will take a while for DH to build up his business and become the regular main earner (at the moment he is dwarfing me but unfortunately being self employed that could all end in a few months!). At the very least take this time to work out what it is you want.
Ah it was Homebase not B&Q! God that's awful, why couldn't it be john lewis or an upmarket DIY shop - not the bathroom aisle of Homebase! (not that there is anything wrong with Homebase, my bathroom was a bargain!! . Although so far this week I have been banned from two things:
1. Going to ikea to pick up some bits for the nursery - "what happened the last time we went to a home improvement shop and you were heavily pregnant".
2. Taking my fathers disastrous wallpaper attempt off the nursery wall (it's only half that needs to come down but boy is that half bad!!!) "What happened the last time you started pulling things about and ripping things off walls when you were heavily pregnant".
So I am now sat on the sofa not doing anything as I have done all my work for today, my sister went to ikea for me and I can't build them up until the wallpaper is redone on Monday. So that's me sat here.
I am however waging war on my hospital which may not be the smartest move but having sent the complaint email from my work account, i am getting very efficient responses!
hello, have poked my head in and seen lots of posts.
BB, do have a rest when you can.
SW, hope you find the right answer for you.
erm, have forgotten what else I meant to respond to... if I say I hope everyone, and all the babies and kids are well, will that cover it?
We are sweltering in an endless heatwave here, which I know sounds lovely, but is really tiring. Have had a really nice summer with the kids, in spite of the dreaded squabbling they indulge in.
A has gone back to the lovely CM's two-three days a week until term starts, DS1 has a friend round and they are shooting each other in the living room. I am doing some translating when I can to bolster my pittance pay, writing up a paper, and half-heartedly preparing for the semester to kick off on Sept 12. DS1 starts back at school on the 5th (has been on holiday since July 1st FFS), and I will have a manic week then...
In Other Matters, it is more or less the same old sorry story, with which I shall not bore you.
BB I am glad you have your feet up.
You speak good sense about the career stuff so can we speak off thread about this?
Auld, wish I was there!
Hi everyone. Juat popped on to look at the due in September thread, and this one came up in active conversations. Nice to see how you are all doing.
It's funny cause I was on our old thread from April 2009 last night, to try and compare this pg with the last one, and ended up reading all around BabiesBolat's adventures with the wall, so its funny to come on today, and find a similar theme. Good luck BB when the time comes.
Will read back a bit later and see what the rest of you have been up to.
I'm 36 weeks pg just now, so am hoping I dont go overdue by as much as last time, although this one has been a faster pg with moving house, running the kilts, and having two boys to chase after, so I can't complain.
Crikey this is the liveliest we have been for ages. Conker do keep us posted. I wonder if you or BB will be first.
BB hope you're still taking it easy.
SW are the ADs kicking in properly yet? They do take a bit to get the right dosage sorted sometimes. Hope you're feeling better soon. I'd side with BB on this, she full of good advice and I think she's quite right that you could easily have enough to keep you active in your chosen field without having to be still at traditional work. xxx Looking forward to see how/what you choose.
Conker hope you're doing well and the move/boys have not tired you out too much tho they say that the more active you arein the latter weeks of your pregnancy the quicker the baby is likely to come... hope the lo stays put until you're feeling ready. xxx
Zulu YEAH! So pleased for you. Sounds like life is taking a turn for the good for you again.
And everyone else, Hello! Hope you're all doing fine!
<<Bebe nods in 'hello' as she's got her hands full of breast or baby as she works on hour 17 of a marathon cluster feeding session>>
Hello hello - some people on here who haven't been around for ages, it's lovely to hear how everyone is! Zulu thanks for job interview enquiry - it went very well, was in there for over 2 hours and they have asked me back for a second interview in September. There's a few aspects of the job that concern me, won't bore you all with the details, but am reserving judgment until the second interview when I'll meet the CEO and get info straight from the horse's mouth, as it were.
Bebe glad the feeding is going better - sounds like you're going great guns with it now.
Puzz the gin comment made me fall off my chair with laughter!
Babies can't wait for your twins to arrive! Hope you have no more scary moments.
Senior Wrangler - I don't know what to say apart from I am sending loads of sympathy, I'd agree with Babies about not doing something that makes you miserable and exhausted. But, I'm in the position of wondering whether to keep working f/t in my chosen career or do something much less stressful and part time in DPs business, but that takes me out of my chosen career. It's a really tough decision, so I understand what a difficult place you're in.
The boys are lovely, Orbit's speech has improved massively although he still says 'Crunket' instead of 'Crumpet' and 'Fleet' instead of 'Sleep' and lots of other brilliant alternatives (we still have Fish Mingers for tea ). I think his ears are improving though because he's started singing and it's actually a recognisable tune - 'Twinkle Twinkle Tar' and 'BaBa Lacksheep'. Back to the docs in Sep for another assessment, so we'll see. DS1 needs to go back to school, he's bouncing off the walls. Only one more week!
H sings 'Ba ba zack sheep' all the time. I pushed her round the supermarket in the trolley the other day and she was singing so loudly people stopped and turned to listen
Aw, singing toddlers are so cute...Moo doesn't sing...well she pretends to with the wooden drum sticks which she thinks are microphones, but it's just random noises. And she does it really quietly; if she notices you listening she stops and runs away. She does not sing songs she 'knows.' I wish she would; I'm very jealous.
ADs starting to work a bit.
May be setting up training business with a chum locally. If I can work out how you do something like that.
Certainly going to resign from job as they are wankers to have done this to me.
GP being brilliant.
SW I am delighted to read that post. Here's to a better future.
I bloody hope so!
So nice you are all supportive xx
On another note (!) Felix sings all day long, knows loads of songs more or less, it's great to hear him. DS2 had a speech problem at that age so couldn't manage much, and it's a lovely surprise that Felix is apparently normal.
SW, am glad you are feeling more positive and have some options.
A also sings a lot, he seems to have an ear for tunes, and just makes up the words as he goes along. He does a mad, rambling "Grand Old Duke of York".
He and DS1 are wrestling and giggling like loons. It'll all end in tears, but is lovely while it lasts. This is a lovely age in spite of the tantrums and "me, me, I'll do it" nonsense.
Must go and check no bones get broken.
Are making this thread all busy so we fill another one up before Babies has her Babies? All this activity! It's uncanny, I tell you....
Auld, my two have a favourite game at the moment called "push me off the bed".
Oi - don't be trying to bopp my babies off this thread - they are in the title so they are bloody well coming before this thread is finished!!!!
Auld how's it going? Do you still have the heatwave? I would be DYING over there if so, it's bad enough here when it's muggy and overcast!
SW - glad you have made a decision - I always think that you can be much more positive about things when you have the ability to plan and I do think leaving the old job is the best thing for you at the moment. Feel free to email - am a bit of a nightmare to get hold of at the moment with work but I always try and dedicate a couple of hours a day to respond to emails and bits. Roll on Friday!
Conker - there will be no bathroom ripping out (as much as I'd like to rip the old bathroom out I might get shot!) I did take down some wallpaper last night but only a couple of strips that were supposed to be put back up today but lo and behold that's not happening until tomorrow now!! and DH calls me impatient
How you feeling now? Are you ready for LO to arrive? Do you know what flavour you are getting this time (sorry if you have said already), I don't so am living my own frustrations through everyone else!!
WFH - well done on second interview - sounds like lots of us are thinking about career things at the moment or in the near future (although have to admit, the ONLY thing I am thinking about at the moment is getting these babas out but not until after Thursday!!!).
Glad Orbit is getting better with his speech. K still isn't saying much at all (he stopped speaking completely about 12 weeks ago after our week away in Ireland and the birth of his cousin who was suddenly here when we arrived home). HV not concerned at all because of his dual language learning and his understanding levels - she believes he is doing it to control situations he is uncomfortable in (that is, returning to a new baby in his space). But his confidence has returned dramatically which is a huge step forward and he's starting to say the words again and there is constant babble coming out of his mouth just not much that sounds like anything of note! We are probably back up to about 15 words (from about 35 before) and some new ones but they are only said on his terms - stubborn little mule. We got that 'it takes two to talk' book and am making an effort to play and use words on his level as it recommends which seems to have helped. Am going to give him a month at nursery (he starts next week) to see if that helps and then he is going in for an assessment to make sure there is no underlying issues. HV seems to think not as his speech was progressing normally until my sisters DD was born and others around us seem less concerned (family and friends) but that doesn't stop me and DH worrying about it. He does sing though (no words but tunes) all the time and dances and is very cute copying the dancing from TV programmes (you know they say TV is bad but it has really helped him with his sounds). Yesterday he started dancing in the middle of Zara and made me dance with him - ho hum I guess you have no shame when you are a mummy!
His favourite thing at the moment is playing with people's tummy's - due to my ever expanding one, he is OBSESSED with checking out everyone else's - feel sorry for anyone who comes to visit, poor nutts gets virtually molested when she comes as he straddles her and tries to get up her top!!! !
Am getting very fed up with being pregnant again now. Am 34 weeks today so babies lungs should be strong enough for the outside world without too much help so now my last milestone is to get to September so the babies are the oldest in the year rather than the youngest and then it's operation get these babies out as soon as I've finished work!
Hope everyone is ok - am off to get some paracetamol (had two moles removed this morning and they said it would be sore - they have NO idea!!!)
BB, we'd have to really try hard to fill a thread before your twins come, given our current form!
The heatwave is over. It's only 29° now (!), there is air circulating, and cooler weather at night, so the boys are sleeping a bit better.
Puzzle, pushing off the bed sounds fun, too.
We went walking in the Alps this weekend, it was lovely. I carried Alex in the backpack on the way up, but not down again (too much strain on the old knees). He had a great time. We saw mountain goats, chamois, vultures and a bright yellow rescue helicopter which came and landed three times in a row beside our hostel. When the CM asked A what he'd seen in the mountains, he replied "cows". Dunno why we bothered going all that way, really, though it's true they were quite impressive cows, roaming free amongst the hikers.
He is talking quite well, in French to French speakers and a weird mix to DS1 and me (Je veux pas eat it. C'est hot. Je peux have some more, please Mummy? Je peux some milk, please? and so on).
He gets furious when I don't understand him, yells gibberish at me and runs off to fume in a corner at the idiocy of his benighted mother.
DS1 starts "big school" next Monday - he has a new, huge schoolbag, a pencil case and a list the length of my arm of materials to buy. His first baby tooth fell out last week. Time is marching on.
Hope everyone is OK...
Right, must crack on.
Auld remind how old DS1 is? They start later over there don't they? Ellen starts Reception next Wednesday. I'm wibbling a bit.
Auld, a culinary question. I inadvertently bought a tin of gesiers a la confit de canard in SuperU while I was in Brittany last month. Is this a body part I may balk at eating?
<shudders at the thought of eating duck's testicles>
<wonders if ducks have testicles>
Puzzle, he is 6 and a half. He has finished his 3 yrs of "maternelle", which he started quite late, at 3 and a half, because they wouldn't take him the previous Sept as he was only 2 and a half. Not that I was keen to start him at school at 2 and a half. They have to turn 3 during the calendar year of their entrance to maternelle, unless your town is more flexible and has spaces in its schools.
DS1 was one of the oldest in his class each year.
So he is starting "primaire" at 6.5, whereas his best friend will not be 6 till Nov.
But even apart from his age, yes, they start actual, proper school later here, as they spend ages doing the groundwork in maternelle, but then in the 1st year of primaire they expect them to get reading and writing mastered pretty damn quick. It is certainly working with DS1, he is almost reading already, after 2 years of working on sounds, syllables, the alphabet, etc.
(that was looooong!)
SW, those are gizzards. Not testicles, but not the most appetising of morsels, either. They eat them in salads in the South-West, with foie gras, that sliced smoked magret de canard stuff, walnuts, possibly fried potatoes. Bref, a salad that blocks your arteries as soon as you glance at it. The gizzards will doubtless be surrounded by a tasty but evil layer of duck fat... I have never bought them or dealt with them, TBH.
In exchange for enlightening you and reassuring you that duck's gonads are not on the menu, may I ask whether you have tested any good recipes for savoury madeleines? I have got my traditional ones down to a fine art (leaving the mixture overnight is the secret, I reckon...), and would like to explore a bit. I know you are a specialist in the field (!)
Brilliant to see this thread so lively again!
SW, even through the medium of t'internet it's obvious you're feeling a bit better. I'm so glad for you. Get ye the f*ck out of that job and onto that other stuff you're thinking about.
Puzzle, push me off the bed does sound brilliant. I bet you can scarcely believe Ellen is off to school. I bet it's as scary as the first day at nursery/childminder (for you). Let us know how she (/you) gets on!
BB, I was glad when you said your working from home was taking it easy. Then you mentioned that you were in Zara. ZARA? With a toddler at 34 weeks pregnant with twins? Are you out of your MIND?? You obviously operate on a whole different stratosphere from me. How are you today? Does it feel wierd that you'll be seeing your babies soon? (But not too soon).
Conkertree, how are you? Any movement yet? You're down Glasgow direction are you not? Hope all is well and not too tiring.
Bebe how's the feeding?
WFH sounds great news about the job and sounds like you're very much in control. A good place to be. I was very much NOT in control during my interview. The other 2 must have been worse though .
AA nice to see you! Your weekend in the Alps sounds like heaven. Great to hear how your gorgeous boys are doing too. Love A's mix of French and English.
Bicnod, you're not posting but I bet you're watching. Howare your big and little (but still quite big!) boys? Your milk must be full cream - I love the chubby little arms in your facebook photos! Girls are so different - I was comparing weights at this stage in the red books and Laura is about 2lbs less than her brother was at the same age.
I am loving my mat leave now the job worries are over. Laura is starting to get an overnight pattern although the days are still random so the fog is lifting. ToddlerWarrior is over the worst of the jealousy too and is a lovely, lively little boy. He said his longest ever sentence tonight: "I've finished my milk but I'm not going to bed; just stay in the living room, OK?". Alarming combination of language and insight .
I must confess I have not done madeleines for ages, but if you like I can experiment a bit next week, once DS1 is back at school.
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