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The last one out forgot to start a new thread!

(1001 Posts)
blueberryboybait Mon 08-Nov-10 08:19:35

Morning, hope you all find me!

alittlebitshy Mon 08-Nov-10 09:09:22

hee hee, i was looking for a cheese related title but found this easily.


hippy hmm. I don't know. I know you have a habit of making out you are ok when you maybe are not (only from vague things you have said) BUT whenever i have seen you since dd, the worst you have seems is tired. do you think dh is being rational or do you think he is trying to find something to use to put the blame onto you?

What sort of ill was it this weekend?
How did dh jump from poorly to pnd?

and i hope pil stayed in hotel again.

I did have PND with dd but not really diagnosed for aaaaaaages as i have a history of depression so i was not sure if it was just up and down stuff or more.

Merlion Mon 08-Nov-10 09:17:21

Whoops - that'll be me then blush

Albs me too but I found that with PND I got terrible anxiety attacks that I didn't have with 'normal' depression.

enyahadenough Mon 08-Nov-10 09:19:52

Found u! Just a quick one as waiting for carpet man then off to the shops... Hip you come across as being so strong and in control so I really hope and don't think it's pnd. As crispy said you have a lot on your plate atm and I think you are coping incredibly well.

Agree with bibi think dh has been in his medical shed too long. Sending you lots of hugs xxxx

enyahadenough Mon 08-Nov-10 09:32:44

just read the end of the last threas and bbbb really hope dd2 gets better quickly.. agree completely with ursula's words, if she is not feeding at all by lunch get her to the docs better to be safe than sorry [hugs] xxx

HippyHippopotamus Mon 08-Nov-10 11:31:41

Oh blueberry, i do hope dd2's back to her normal lovely self v soon

i posted early hours a long reply but itouch seems to have deleted it!

thanks all for your comments. the ridiculous thing is that i feel more in control of house, dcs now than i ever have. albs, yes, you're right, i do pretend all is fine when its not but this isn't actually one of those times..honest! i'm really chuffed with how much more sorted the house is now (which makes dh's stepford wife display even funnier). Illness is undiagnosed! thought originally it was mastitius, felt awful all of friday, feverish, sensitive skin, dizzy etc which is why he had to take the day off work. no way i could have coped on my own. woke up saturday feeling well enough to drive so went to one of my best friend's hen dos. it was at her parent's house so i knew if i wanted to i could spend the whole time in bed but there was no way i wasn't going at all (unless really ill obv!). dh picked an argument before i left so i drove off in tears, ds in tears etc was all horrible. i just took dd with me and it was lovely spending lots of time with her on her own! anyhow, got lots of text from dh during the night telling me how ill ds was etc. i could have come straight home at midnight but i knew there was nothing more i could do for him and he had his parents to help him so i stayed where i was. he reckoned ds alot better sunday morning so i didn't get back til 4ish. they were just getting back from a long walk/lunch etc. ds blatantly not well at all and i was cross they'd had him out in the cold but didn't say anything (what's done was done and all that). So (trying to cut a long story short!), dh really 'off' with me, barely talking etc so obviously angry with me about something. he came upstairs when i was getting dd ready for bed and told me that if we were going to talk that now was the only time he had until this time next week to sort things out. last night i was tired, feeling illl, worried about ds and really really didn't want to have a long drawn out argument with him so i told him to put me in his calendar for next week. it was whilst i was refusing to talk to him about what was wrong that he told me i should book an appt to docs because of pnd. i will do the test now (thanks Merlion) but i will be amazed if i have got it. i'd better go now, pil needing attention (they're staying with us but leaving today. they've been really good despite dh snapping at them most of the time hmm) Thanks again, it helps being able to talk about things without being judged. sorry if this is a ramble array of words and doesn't make sense. i was up most the night with ds (typically dd only woke once!) and still feeling pretty rough myself. hey ho, if nothing else, pil have seen this morning that i'm coping absolutely fine with both dcs (i'm willing to bet that dh has asked them their opinion!). and on that note, i'd realy better get off the computer grin

HippyHippopotamus Mon 08-Nov-10 11:32:19

oops, bit of an essay! feel free to not read it and just tell me 'yes dear'! smile

Merlion Mon 08-Nov-10 11:50:00

Hippy thanks for posting - it was obviously cathartic wink

Sounds like you're doing fine - is just DH who isn't. Hope you manage to sort it out. I hope I cope half as well with 2!

Silk I meant to say your holiday sounds great and so thoughtful of your parents making those arrangements.

enyahadenough Mon 08-Nov-10 12:20:52

Hip you are doing great, sound completely in control, stick by your guns!! really hope you feel better soon and ds recovers quickly too..

we now have beautiful clean carpets and sofas tho soaking wet atm!! Trying to keep dd2 entertained so we went into the playroom... big mistake so now trying to tackle it again.. ours friends have 3 dcs and an immaculate house shock really put me to shame so am desperately trying to restore order!!!

how are you feeling these days merlion?? xx

alittlebitshy Mon 08-Nov-10 13:06:17

I stick by what i said then - you are coping great.
Good for pil to see dh being grumpy arse. did they witness him being off with you? I do hope so!!!!
I think it was off of dh to text you re ds being ill. i mean you yourself were under the weather so another drive back the same day would have not been useful. if he had been taken to hospital, yes, but not for what was probably a bad cold/fever etc. You did not need the worry

why the feck has he got no time until next sunday? it is not his weekend away is it??? if go - grr!! And to be honst, if he really thought you had pnd and was that concerned he would not be wondering off leaving you with the 2 dc on your own. so i actually think he is picking fights and trying to justify his feeling that you are the unreasonable one.

I know my dh and many of the dhs on here (not on here - you know what i mean) would not be expecting some of the things of us that your dh expects of you when he is being grumpy. ironing, meals, tidy houses......He is part of the Hippy family too and he needs to do his part. And assuming you do not have pnd, he is going the right way to make sure you are bloody unhappy anyhow. And knowing you were ill - yes you had been away overnight (not alone though with dd) why on earth was dh not getting up to ds?????

alittlebitshy Mon 08-Nov-10 13:08:08

enya how much do you pay for carpet man???
i had ours done just before ds came along but the dcs rooms both need doing as ds has helpfully put dd's makeup (play stuff, as in tell her - not for real life (she might beg to differ) all over both their carpets. raaaah. can't remember what i paid but would like to compare before i do anything.

blueberryboybait Mon 08-Nov-10 13:10:09

DD2 still not fed since 4am and no wet nappy since 7 am so we are of to the doc at 3. I am not totally worried but everything she has had today milk and water have come right back up - instantly. DD1's nursery called and asked me to fetch her as she was sleeping and a bit hot - DH collected her and has returned me the nengiser bunny who has wolfed down 2 bowls of spicy parsnip soup and a cheese sandwich!

Hippy - you do sound like you are coping fine but DH is not and istrying to find a way of putting how he feels upon you.

Merlion - how are you feeling? How long until 12 weeks?

Silk - you have great parents by the sounds of it.

Hellooo Ursula and Red - what no hurricane?

ST please change back to you ST=sanitary towel to me! Hope you are doing well with the girls and time change.

Merlion Mon 08-Nov-10 13:21:25

2 long weeks to go bbbb.........

One of my close friends went back to England today am very sad

enyahadenough Mon 08-Nov-10 13:27:38

Good luck at the docs bbbb

albs was £120 for a 4 piece and 2 piece suite large rug and stairs and landing which is pretty big. Quite a bit of money but well well worth it.

2 weeks will fly merlion xx

aDarkStarWithStrangeWays Mon 08-Nov-10 13:34:38

Hippy being charitable for a moment, maybe bbbb has it right and your H is feeling shut out by what he perceives as you, DS and DD being 'the perfect family unit'. Not that I'm condoning this if he is, the poor fucking diddums, but he strikes me as quite the insecure/immature type from previous behaviour so possibly likely to feel this way.

I will restrain myself from making further comment biscuit

HippyHippopotamus Mon 08-Nov-10 15:15:08

why restrain yourself star? wink i reckon you're talking sense! i've tried to get him to do more, esp with dd. not sure what more i can do on that front

he just doesn't seem to have much common sense at the moment. eg i said to dh last night to give ds a couple of spoons of calpol before he went to bed (he didn't, he ignored me which meant ds had trouble going to sleep and was awake a short while after but anyhow). He commented that he wished he'd known on sat night that ds could have had two spoons. the dosage is on the box ffs (which the bottle was still in). i restrained myself from mentioning i had assumed he could read for himself how much to give him

pil have left, my dad apparently on his way! had a lovely morning with them. atmosphere alot easier without dh being here. but no albs, i don't think they heard him talking to me but they witnessed him not coping with dd too well. she'd had a particularly horrible nappy, went over everything. so he stripped her downstairs and then decided to give her a bath. so she unsurprisingly got cold and started screaming. i left him to it because a) i was eating my dinner and b) i didn't think he'd want me showing him up in front of his parents. he paniced, got stressed and shouted at me for not helping. i told him all he needed to do was ask. so he did and i calmly helped and ran her a bath (and ended up doing her bath, drying,dressing her so yes dinner was cold but hey ho)

dh didn't get up for ds last night because he was sleeping downstairs

and yes, its this weekend he's away (thurs morn til late sun, i think)

merlion get as many things as you can bear in the diary for the next two weeks. keep busy and it really will fly by

re carpets albs there's a place not far from me that was doing a special offer. on the main road just past the w churchill statue.might be worth asking in there if they're still doing it. think it was half price...

hmm, sorry, this is another essay!

right, off to do that test before dad arrives...

HippyHippopotamus Mon 08-Nov-10 15:24:34

something wrong with the reckons i'm 'normal' grin

i reckon a snuggle on the sofa with both dcs is called for now...see ya'll later

blueberryboybait Mon 08-Nov-10 15:33:15

Well DD2 did her charming baby routine! Still no wee but she smile, babbles and generally made me look stupid and paranoid, she threw up in the car on the way there so was puke covered when we arrived. I have just offered her a feed and she hasn't thrown up just yet so thing are more than likely on the mend!

Hippy - I always expected that test to ask - 'what are you hiding?' or 'why are you so chirpy?'

HippyHippopotamus Mon 08-Nov-10 15:38:27

i do hope she's turned a corner bbbb. hoping that's either the right expression or that you know what i mean!

sooooooooo tired! i shouldn't have sat down!

Silkstalkings Mon 08-Nov-10 16:09:13

Hippy Looks to me like you're doing as well as can be expected under very difficult circs. Tell him you've been to GP, yes you have PND and GP says he has to help out more. Write out a list of tasks that need to be done each day so he can make his own decisions. Don't forget to add Coping with Constant Pain', 'Coping with Sulking Immature Husband,''Trying to Be Myself in Front of Visitors,' 'Spending Time by Myself' to the list.
Well done for not flying home when DS was ill btw, I am firmly of the belief that if all a child needs is a cuddle and sleep, then Daddy will certainly do.

Silkstalkings Mon 08-Nov-10 16:13:53

Oh and make him watch The Little House with you at 9pm tonight. All about PND and manipulative family LOL.

HippyHippopotamus Mon 08-Nov-10 17:55:10

thanks silk smile

alittlebitshy Mon 08-Nov-10 18:23:54

NORMAL? nah! oh you mean not depressed? oh ok, i'll give you that! wink.

Why the feck was he sleeping downstairs?

CrispyTheCrisp Mon 08-Nov-10 18:49:46

<runs through, plants a flag to mark a spot>

Laters Ladies smile

BibiBelle Mon 08-Nov-10 20:12:42

grin at poor fucking didums!!!

dealing with stock for shop but wanted to let you know your efforts to hide were utterly futile and I followed Crisp's crumb trail heregrin

Merlion - I have nothing but good thoughts/feelings about your lovely news so positive notes all round. Sorry about your friend going home though <hugs>

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