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For those of you who's children are Christened - what did you look for in a Godparent....

(8 Posts)
jumpyjan Tue 09-Jun-09 17:31:29

.... and did you choose friends or family members.

My sister and sister in law are Godparents to DD. Both are religious (to some extent), both were very interested in DD and so we thought we could rely on them in the future to take an interest, give her guidance etc.

However, we are really struggling to choose Godparents for DS. We think it is appropriate to choose 2 Godfathers. I quite like the idea of choosing relatives as I feel friends can come and go (my Godmother has absolutely no contact with me/my family anymore), however I also feel it is important to chose relatives who have some degree of faith, sadly this does not leave us with many options.

Just wondering how other people made their choices.

Wheelybug Tue 09-Jun-09 17:36:00

We chose friends not family as we felt family were special already andit would nice to add to the special people in the dd's lives (sounds cheesy when I write it like that).

We chose friends who we felt would be around a while - they are all friends we (or one of us) have had for a long time. I felt they should have some sort of faith and that we felt would take the idea seriously.

DD1 has a couple - the people (I did postgrad studies with her and DH went to uni with him) and one of my best friends from uni

DD2 will have (hopefully, yet to ask the couple as dd2 is only 12 weeks old) a couple - he was DH's best friend at uni and have since become close friends as a couple and then DH's oldest female friend (from school).

jumpyjan Tue 09-Jun-09 17:49:37

Thanks Wheelybug. I feel choosing a couple is a good option but I can't think of anyone suitable ie. where the male has any kind of faith. I can think of a few female friends who we could ask but as its for a boy I would quite like to have Godfathers rather than Godmothers.

Its feeling like the only option is to choose someone who will be there for DS but does not have faith - but that does not feel right.

SJisontheway Tue 09-Jun-09 17:52:34

I'm catholic and from what I remember when DD was christened it was recomended that at least 1 godparent be practicing, so if it made your choice easier you could go for 1 with some sort of faith, and the other not necessarily, but who you know will take an interest in your child.

Wheelybug Tue 09-Jun-09 17:59:40

The traditional number I think is 3 so you have 2 of the same sex and 1 of the opposite. So, could you have a couple where the female has some sort of faith even though the husband doesn't (obv ideal if he doesn't actively oppose the ideas !).

Itsjustafleshwound Tue 09-Jun-09 18:06:07

Traditionally, godparents are chosen that,should the unthinkable happen, there would be some nominated people to pick up the mantle of care...

Also, godparents are meant to be a spiritual or religious guide ..

Saying that, we chose family members as our DC's godparents (followed family tradition!!)and they are named in our wills ...

crokky Tue 09-Jun-09 18:22:40

My children have the same godparents - my brother and my future sister in law (couple) and my brother in law (single). (I have a DS and a DD so DD has 2 godfathers!).

I felt it was important to have people who cared about the child (rather than caring about the child's mum and dad). Brother and SIL see kids all the time and are v interested in them. BIL doesn't but I had to have him as DH insisted on someone from his side of the family as well, even though BIL was obviously inappropriate for the role (he had not even met DD prior to the christening and he has not seen either child since).

Can't have everything grin

jumpyjan Tue 09-Jun-09 20:03:25

Thanks for the replies - its really interesting to know how other people have made their choices.

It just seems it is very difficult to tick all 3 boxes 1) being interested in the child 2) having some degree of faith and 3)preferably a family member, if not a very close long term friend.

Until we make a decision we feel we cannot plan the christening which we would love to hold in the summer as so much easier.

Thinking about it for me the interest in the child is becoming one of the most important things as I don't want a Godparent who does not remember birthdays etc (as mine did).

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