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Muslim Mumsnetters...how are you preparing for Ramadan this year?

(20 Posts)
PussinJimmyChoos Wed 30-Jul-08 22:44:44

I'm getting a bit twitchy about it all and am panicking that we will have an Indian summer and it will be hot...I should be looking forward to Ramadan as a peaceful and blessed month but atm am just seeing it as a huge inconvenience as I find the working p/t etc stressful enough without fasting... sad

eandz Wed 30-Jul-08 22:50:43

hmm... well
ever since we got married Ramadhan for us has been non existent. I would LOVE to have the kind of Ramadhan my parents raised us with, but I don't know any Muslims here in London. We tried last Eid to meet people at the Mosque but everyone was really cliquey and people were a bit judgmental when they found out my husband and i weren't 1. same ethnicity and 2. didn't have an arranged marriage.

I'll still be pregnant till mid Ramadhan, and when the baby comes I think my dad will come over and whip my husbands butt into shape about stuff...

how are you prepping for it?

PussinJimmyChoos Wed 30-Jul-08 22:59:55

Not prepping as such at the mo...more like panicking...thinking of sorting it with work so I can leave an hour early every day (take it out of my holiday allowance) so that I can take it easy doing the nursery run, have time to prepare food for iftar before picking DS up....but generally, am just panicking...hmm

My friend, albeit quite a bit older than me, lives in London - if you want me to put you in contact with her so you can someone for Ramadan, please let me know. She is Somalian and Mash'Allah, so good. You can always CAT me too - moral support via the net! smile

eandz Thu 31-Jul-08 09:33:07

i'm worrying about iftar myself. my husband is such a picky eater! he only eats things his mother makes and i'm fed up with having his mom cook for us every week just so he'll eat.

sure, i'll meet your friend! especially if it means i might get a possible dinner guest. or someone to just talk to. i'm soo lonely here.

ummadam Thu 31-Jul-08 10:34:27

Assalaamu alaikum

Panicing is a good way of putting it! it is my 7th ramadan alhamdolillah and the longest yet. Last year was hard as i was pregnant so missed 6days but at least I was working full time so the days weren't so long.
This year I have my DS who will be 8months in September. The idea of Isha at 10pm then getting up for suhoor without waking him then back to bed before he wakes at 6am, having to feed him his meals and not break fast until he is in bed fills be with dread!

I know I should be excited and i always am when I get there but the anticipation is scary! I know that since I'm still BF I could not fast. But I managed really well when I was pregnant alhamdolillah and I'm only feeding him 3x a day now so will have to see. I don't really want any more days to make up!

eandz - whereabouts are you? i am in north london Can i suggest you try what i do.... iftar is dates and water like the sunnah then we have a normal dinner. Personally I find it hard to eat lots when I have been fasting and kind of think that stuffing yourself misses the point somewhat. If he doesn't like it or wants more/different food then my husband knows he can get his own

ummadam Thu 31-Jul-08 10:36:25

ps. which mosque do you go to? we go to palmers green which is nice but I still find it more cliquey and less friendly than our old mosque in south london. I find we get stared at a bit - I'm english and my husband is mixed race.

PussinJimmyChoos Thu 31-Jul-08 10:50:59

Ummmadam - can't stop long but didn't know if you knew that you don't have to make up the days missed from fasting while pg or breastfeeding - you can pay a certain amount for each day to charity. I would strongly recommend you don't fast while breast feeding - it really isn't healthy for you or the baby, even though he is only feeding x3 a day. Islam is flexible you know!

ummadam Thu 31-Jul-08 11:35:26

Thanks PussinJimmychoos - I was certainly under the impression that you do have to make them up (but not prayers)along the lines of this answer from Sunnipath sunnipath answer

but I would be very happy to learn that you don't

I'm planning on playing it by ear as I did when I was pregnant. I'm a doctor so have no intention of putting my son or myself at risk. When pregnant I started each day as if I would fast but broke it early if I started to feel unwell. Baby will take what he needs from me and there has been a lot of medical research to show that they do not suffer aslong as the mother remains in good health.

Jazakhallahu khair sister for your kindness in replying to me

eandz Thu 31-Jul-08 11:41:57

ummadam,
i'm in st johns wood, so the closest is the central london mosque (regents park). would you and your family like to be my first iftar guest?

where i'm from (texas) everyone does rounds for iftar and then weekends the whole community does a giant pot luck. i want my son to grow up with a similar ramadhan experience. would you be interested?

ummadam Thu 31-Jul-08 12:06:12

eandz, a big part of me would like to say yes please but I will have to speak to my husband and see what he says. He rarely gets home in time for iftar at the moment and I think I would be a bit daft going alone with a baby to someone's house that I met on the internet winkblush although I am sure you are lovely

When is your baby due inshallah? I have a little boy too and it would be lovely to meet up

eandz Thu 31-Jul-08 12:34:54

oh ummmadam,
we would meet first maybe at the park or somewhere neutral like a coffee place so you know i'm not a crazy pregnant woman .

my baby boy is due on Sept 20th (i'A).

...I'll tell you about myself in case you're interested. I'm 24 years old, I'm a common blend of American and Kashmiri. I studied bio chem and mole genetics, but really have always dreamed of being a trophy wife...too bad that plan fell through when I got pregnant and actually doubled in size. (no joke). I'm 8 months pregnant and not enjoying pregnancy. I am looking forward to meeting my little boy though!!!

My husband (25) is Burmese and Bengladeshi (another common mix). He works for a swiss bank as a fund manager for the middle eastern and north african markets. (i don't really know what all of that means really).

PussinJimmyChoos Thu 31-Jul-08 12:58:13

Hmm...I would question that sunnipath tbh...I've been told categorically that no fasting when pg or nursing by quite a few learned friends although I will now of course double check this....although you can choose to do it if you wish and you just either make it up with payment or actually making up the fast days. Am positive it is not obligatory!

ummadam Thu 31-Jul-08 14:21:17

please let me know what you find PJCs - I would love to wrong on this one

eandz - LOL sounds like a good plan.

eandz Thu 31-Jul-08 15:18:48

PussinJimmyChoos and ummadam,
here is my email address: kishmish at gmail dot com

*ummadam, i just realized that this was your kunya. i was gonna name our son adam but we're thinking of Noah since it'll make my mom feel a little bit happier to know her side of the family was thought of.

ummadam Thu 31-Jul-08 16:04:29

eandz - you've got mail

eandz Thu 31-Jul-08 16:12:29

... yes, yes i do. you'll have some soon too!

PussinJimmyChoos Thu 31-Jul-08 16:25:50

Oooh <happy that people in london will meet up due to her thread> smile

ummadam Thu 31-Jul-08 16:32:29

it's a good thread PJCs I've been waiting for the first ramadan thread but felt i was too much of a newbie to start it

PussinJimmyChoos Thu 31-Jul-08 16:34:50

Ill Hamdu Illah....now, back to Ramadan...shall I view it as a religious diet you think for purposes of motivation?? wink

eandz Thu 31-Jul-08 17:33:52

i used to LOVE ramadhan!

as far as motivation goes:

i usually get my eid outfit in mind and then feel like as an extra reward for fasting that the outfit will look extra nice on me for eid prayer. (i'm vain like that).

My mumsnet profile has a picture of me getting ready for the henna party me and my sisters usually host the night before eid (obviously in tx). But this year I'll have to do my own henna with a new born.

i'm not sure what i'll wear for eid this year since i've gained about 7 stones in this pregnancy (nothing fits) so i might just not wear anything pretty/new till i get my body back.

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