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Philosophy/religion

Can someone help me with RC Funeral please.

40 replies

Tiredemma · 07/03/2017 09:44

My dear Mum passed away last tuesday.

Yesterday we set about arranging the funeral and the church that we chose informed us that we cannot have Secular music at all.
I know some Hymns that my Mum loved ('How Great Thou Art being one of them). I suppose it would be easier for me to just slam on the Celine Dion but obviously this isnt possible. Could you kindly point me in the right direction of some nice (and appropriate) music for the service. I need to get this right.

Thanks in advance for your help.

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frazzled3ds · 07/03/2017 09:53

I'm sorry for your loss Flowers

My nana passed away at the end of January, and it was a RC funeral for her too. I wasn't all that familiar with the hymns chosen (not that I was in much of a state to sing anyway). Are there any that come to mind as favourites? Amazing Grace is nice, How Great Thou Art is another that comes to mind. Maybe the church has some on CD you could listen to and select from, or a helpful organist who may be able to play you a few? Most of the hymns I know these days are the bright and cheerful type the kids sing at school, probably not best suited to a funeral :-/

I hope you find some music that you like.

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imelda3 · 07/03/2017 09:53

So sorry for your loss.

Was she a nature lover? "All Things Bright and Beautiful"and "Morning has Broken" are nice and a bit optimistic. "The Lord's My Shepherd" is quite comforting, to the extent that's humanly possible. "Praise my Soul the KIng of Heaven" is a bit rousing!

Hope that helps a bit. IME funeral directors often have good suggestions.

Wishing you well with it all. Xx

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lorelairoryemily · 07/03/2017 09:55

is it hymns you're looking for op?

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Tiredemma · 07/03/2017 09:58

Hi I suppose it is hymns- I emailed the Priest to ask for some further clarification on what music would be appropriate. What should she enter into Church to / exit to etc. I think I understand the part about what hymns we sing during the service but would she just arrive and exit to organ music?

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Tiredemma · 07/03/2017 09:59

She loved The Old Rugged Cross but I looked online and there was a suggestion that this would be frowned upon?

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TheWoollybacksWife · 07/03/2017 10:02

So sorry for your loss Flowers

i know my church has a hymn book with suggested hymns for different types of service in the back - so will suggest hymns for funerals, weddings etc. Could you ask the priest for a copy to help you?

"How Great thou Art" is an excellent choice. When my dad died we had "I Watch the Sunrise" as one of the hymns. The chorus is beautiful as it says "but you are always close to me". 25 years later it still reduces me to tears when I hear it.

"My God Loves Me", "On Eagle's Wings" and ""Walk With Me" may also be suitable.

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Rainatnight · 07/03/2017 10:03

How about Ave Maria? It's a classic and very solemn and appropriate for a funeral.

Does she have any friends from her own church who might know what hymns she liked?

Otherwise, the church doing the funeral should have some suggestions. Sometimes they even have a little booklet with hymn and reading suggestions.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

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ElspethFlashman · 07/03/2017 10:05

Oh God......I Watch The Sunrise.....that one kills me.

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Tiredemma · 07/03/2017 10:05

I Watch the Sunrise is one that I have been looking for but couldn't recall the title! thank you!

She also liked Ave Maria- I will put that on the list too.

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MrsDoylesladder · 07/03/2017 10:06

So sorry for your loss. I'm RC and I lost my mum last October. The priest should be helping you here. Did your Mum have any church going mates that might be able to help?
We had a simple mass that we cobbled together with help from the priest and from friends. Mum was cremated after the mass at her church and the priest gave a simple blessing there. We dealt with the ashes privately- there is some new bs from the church about where to bury/scatter ashes but we ignored that. We knew what Mum wanted.
I really am very sorry.

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Fatfingeredtrade · 07/03/2017 10:07

Sorry for your loss Flowers.

In addition to some of the above, Make Me a Channel of your Peace is a lovely hymn.

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MrsDoylesladder · 07/03/2017 10:08

I also can't remember the actual title of "I watch the sunrise..." but it is lovely and had me in tears at the last mass I went too.

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MrsMulder · 07/03/2017 10:13

So sorry for your loss op, I am sure it will be a lovely service for your mum.

I was also coming on to say 'I watch the sunrise' such a beautiful hymn. If you can get a copy of the churches hymn book it will have a list of occasions in the back and appropriate hymns for each occasion. I also agree with others though, the priest should be able to help you out.

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Tiredemma · 07/03/2017 10:19

We will be meeting the Priest next week so he may be of help- just dont want to be caught off guard by him by my limited knowledge and then find myself choosing songs that I will be later disappointed.

Mum will also be cremated so we have a couple of her favourite songs for that part of the day (Country & Western!!)

We plan to split her ashes, some will go up to where she has her mobile home (shropshire), I plan to take some to be interned into the grave of my Nan and Grandad and the remainder will be interned into a plot on her local crem site, which she had arranged with her husband (not my DF).

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MrsDoylesladder · 07/03/2017 10:24

If he's a priest worth his salt he won't be trying to catch you out and shouldn't care if you are stumbling through the detail. Please don't worry about that.
The cremation plans sound just the thing.

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Amammi · 07/03/2017 10:35

I am sorry for your loss may your mother rest in peace.

Here I am Lord is a lovely hymn and so is Love is His Word.

The funeral director would often suggest a musician and they would have a repertoire of music for funerals that they could suggest to you.

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Systamex · 07/03/2017 11:45

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I've been to many funerals (Ireland) and the hymns Ave Maria and Panis Angelicus are often used. Both beautiful, moving and very dignified.

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Rainatnight · 07/03/2017 13:15

I love 'Here I Am, Lord'. Good suggestion.

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Lessstressedhemum · 08/03/2017 14:00

I watch the Sunrise is beautiful for a funeral All Things Bright and Beautiful is another one that is regularly chosen. Such Love is lovely On Eagles Wings is a bit more modern. Irish Blessing is also beautiful.

I am Church Officer in our church and, as such, have to be at all funerals. Funeral hymns can be anything you want, whichever ones meant something to your mum Or mean something to our.

I am sorry for your loss. May you feel God's presence near you, may he bind up your wounds and shelter you in the palm of his hand.

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Heathen4Hire · 08/03/2017 14:13

I went to a colleague's RC funeral, and he was in a Celidh band, so the priest allowed them to play a tribute. This was in North London. I am surprised your priest won't allow anything but hymns? Sorry for your loss Flowers

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emwithme · 08/03/2017 14:17

Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring?

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lorelairoryemily · 08/03/2017 21:45

Op I sent you a pm

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MrsDustyBusty · 08/03/2017 21:51

Most of the funerals I've gone to have included Going Home and Hail Queen of Heaven.

www.lnwhymns.com/Hymn.aspx?ID=15

en.m.wikisource.org/wiki/Catholic_Hymns_(1860)/Hail,_Queen_of_Heaven

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banivani · 08/03/2017 21:52

I am so sorry for your loss. I'm active RC and afaik you could have something secular played after the mass is over if there is something you absolutely love - but it may well be up to the organist's or priest's discretion. I base this mostly on our organist once playing a "little composition from a largely unknown Italian baroque composer called Giovanni Lennoni", i.e. "Yesterday" in a baroque organ arrangement. But he only pulled that little stunt after the priest had said the final blessing.

I'm afraid I don't know any English hymns but the Ave Maria is always lovely and appropriate. I also think you should be able to get some help in choosing from the church. ❤

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RedMetamorphosis · 08/03/2017 21:54

When my grandad died, his best friend sang Old Rugged Cross. That was a full bells and whistles RC mass and the priest had no problem with it at all.

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