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A question for christians from a christian.....

9 replies

Wolfgirl · 16/02/2007 20:59

I married late, age 39 and went on to have two fab kids - now aged 3 and 1. I lived in the south east of the UK and moved to the west country. when single I had numerous friends - heaps to be honest - but most have moved away/married or whatever. I belonged to a very lively happy clappy church. for years.

I have a dilema and have to ask what would you do or have done. and wwjd.

we have been invited by one of my long ago single friends to his wedding - from the SE.. My usual place to stay in that area was not an option this time, so I called upon some friends - still single - if they could help. They are christians and have been my best friends I would have to add for many many years. Two of those friends are men, single and 3 bedroom houses. Neither one of them wanted to put us because of the kids.

I have tried to be gracious and understanding. And am understanding. But somehow I find myself thinking about them and there rejection of helping us, and wondered if it is right. I guess, in my thinking, theyre belongings, including their home (and doesnt scripture say.. as for me and my home we shall serve the Lord - or something like that) belong to God. In my view, my life is Gods life. I gave my life and belongings to God, and so did they. And yet here they are not helping a sister in the kingdom in need.

Help put my head/heart straight please dear people.

xx

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Ladymuck · 16/02/2007 21:06

There could be 101 reasosn why it wasn't appropriate for them to have you staying. You shouldn't take it personally. Some people have the gifts of hospitality, others haven't. And none of us are perfect. Make sure that you forgive them and make some other arrangements.

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Wolfgirl · 16/02/2007 22:20

...that was encouraging

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PeachyClair · 16/02/2007 22:32

WWJD?

he would have made them at home

bt also.... he wouldn't have judged.

I am sure theya re friends with good reasons. some people find it exceptionally difficult to break routine or have people in their hom- my mum was like that, it wasn't nastiness, it was her make up

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GhostOfMumsnet · 16/02/2007 22:37

agree 100% with peachychair

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soph28 · 16/02/2007 22:42

I once heard a talk on wwjd? - the guy basically said- why do we ask what Jesus would HAVE DONE as if Jesus were no longer around- the question to ask is What IS Jesus Doing Right Now?
Also how could we presume to know what Jesus would have done in any given situation, as he often reacted in a very unconventional way!

Anyway I just thought that was interesting and a very good point but still probably doesn't help you very much! IMO it is totally up to them, they may have very good reasons- maybe they had planned a party or something- just beacuse they're Christians doesn't mean they don't have a life!
I think you should just accept it and try to work some alternative out- don't stress about it. Hope you get something else sorted- maybe God has a better idea of where you can stay

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SueBaroo · 17/02/2007 18:04

yeah, I can understand why you're ticked off, but it's probably a good idea to use it as an opportunity to be gracious and deliberately refuse to indulge in any resentment.
Hospitality is something more Christians should embrace, that's for sure, but like anything - we can't impose something on others, no matter how virtuous the thing is. So, pray for them, pray for your own attitudes, and I hope you get some accomodation sorted and get to enjoy the wedding!

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nearlythree · 17/02/2007 20:43

I can't imagine anything more terrifying to single nearly-middle-aged men than little children. Yes, they could have helped, but they probably panicked over all kinds of things from whether your children would be safe (stair gates? trip hazards?) to moving all their precious belongings, to worrying about the noise disturbing the neighbours.

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bloss · 18/02/2007 13:33

Message withdrawn

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Wolfgirl · 19/02/2007 08:41

Thanks all for responding. Its over! Hurt gone. And I did see my friends and all is well without grudge or emotion.

I agree with all your comments, and especially about single folk being a little cautious about having kids around, which is why I totally understand.

I also agree, that we are very BAD at hospitality - although its something I relish in, and would squash anyone in my house if the need be. But then Im lacking in so many other ways, that I have to bleat about something LOL.

All the best to you all.
xx