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New Years resolution- being a better person

(9 Posts)
ocelot41 Mon 29-Dec-14 18:52:08

Does anyone want to join me in starting 2015 with the intention of trying to be a better person? Without wanting to self flagellate, I have become more aware if my faults and failings in the last year and I would like to try and work on them.

I am going to start off with trying to be a better listener and to be better at prioritising the things that really matter over endless stuff.

Anyone want to join me in a bit of self improvement?

OutwiththeOutCrowd Fri 02-Jan-15 10:38:58

I have many faults needing rectified - it's hard to pick out just one! But I would like to be tidier and more organised. I think this would make me a better person as far as other people are concerned too.

By the way, Ocelot, a couple of weeks ago, I started a thread here that was - like yours - a bit more on the philosophical side than the religious side - and only got one reply. Someone suggested I contact MNHQ and get it moved to Chat. This I did, and got loads more feedback. Anyway just passing on my experience. I don't think the New Year Resolution window of opportunity is over yet and this is a lovely 'feel good' thread idea imo!

imostlyreadandlurk Fri 02-Jan-15 13:12:46

yes please, can I join? I don't post very often because I'm not very brave and feel like I've lost my voice lately but that's one of the things I want to work on this year.

One of my resolutions is to read and write more - various reasons. I already keep a diary/journal which I want to write in more often, but I think I'm going to start a blog as a way to write more and work on the confidence issues.

So it's 2 January - how are you two getting on? I feel like I'm still mulling and processing my resolutions! smile brew

OutwiththeOutCrowd Sat 03-Jan-15 12:30:58

Hi imostlyreadandlurk, nice to see another person on this thread! My resolution was to be tidier and I have been a bit better about washing up dirty dishes as they appear rather than leaving them to moulder like the slovenly student type I am usually.

I would like to wish you good luck with your writing and finding your voice again. Would you blog about your own day-to-day life or would you be more interested in commenting on the news or expressing your views on various issues?

I like writing too. There are some fragments of a children's story I wrote in a drawer somewhere. Maybe if I tidy up a bit I'll find those sheets of paper and can add some more to my story!

innerstrength100 Sat 03-Jan-15 15:53:43

Hello Ocelot - I have also resolved to try and be a nicer/better person this year.

I have been through some horrible stuff recently (as detailed elsewhere on here!) and have been so so grateful to the people who have supported me; so I would like to give back more to other people. I really hope one day I can help someone in the same way that a couple of close friends have helped me in my struggles, because I really really could not have managed without them.

Also related to that, I am going to try and be a better daughter to my parents. They have also helped me a lot recently, and I'm afraid I have not been good at the commandment to respect/honour parents in the past, as my relationship with them has had a lot of ups and downs. I want to be a nicer/better person, and help them and others more.

imostlyreadandlurk Sat 03-Jan-15 22:19:36

Well done with the washing up, Outwith, that's one of my most loathed household jobs!

Lovely to find a fellow writing enthusiast too. Hope you find that story. I think I might blog about a mixture of things, more personal to begin with - maybe initially I just need some thoughts to be 'out there'... I've written a draft first post or two and realised that I can be quite negative and selfish in my head, but moderate myself when writing for public consumption. I want my inner monologue to be as nice as my public persona! I'm moving house in a couple of days so packing is delaying setting up a blog.

Hi Innerstrength, great resolutions smile

Hope Ocelot comes back

MrsGiraffe12 Sun 04-Jan-15 15:54:27

Mine is be a better mummy and wife. I find I loose my temper far too easily and shout at my eldest too much. And generally far too snappy with my hubby.

I hate myself for it :-(

OutwiththeOutCrowd Sun 04-Jan-15 22:02:02

Innerstrength

I have seen some of your posts on the prayer thread and they have touched me deeply. (I see that thread as a haven for theists so I don't post there myself.) But I am glad you are also on this thread as I would like to say a few things to you! First of all, nobody is at their best when they are under stress, so if you find you are not always living up to your own high standards, don't judge yourself too harshly. Your parents would wish you to be gentle on yourself too. You are providing security and continuity of care for their grandchildren. I can not think of a better way of being a good daughter.

And, not about your resolution, but in response to some of the things you mentioned on the other thread. (I hope you don't mind.)

Tears: they have a physiological purpose. When you cry, you secrete stress hormones in your tears, preventing a build up of toxic chemicals in your body. For this reason, I think you should allow the tears to come when they come. They are a natural, and healing, part of grief - whatever the reason for that grief - and not a sign of weakness at all. I think you will notice that you feel calmer after tears as the 'bad' chemicals are released. This phase won't go on forever, I promise you. Better times will come. Personally, I like the phrase 'this too will pass', although I know it's not biblical!

MrsGiraffe12

Hmmm,I think you should reframe your resolution! It’s very guilt-inducing. Your resolution should be about giving yourself more time to relax and unwind instead. I think you'll find the being less snappy resolution will then be automatically fulfilled.

imostlyreadandlurk

Get those thoughts out there on the page. If you let your thoughts express themselves in nice grammatical sentences 'out in the world', they'll stop chasing round and round your head like two squirrels endlessly chasing each other's tails. (That's been my experience, anyway!)

Ocelot41

Prioritise us over endless stuff! wink Come and have a look at the thread seed you planted ...

OutwiththeOutCrowd

I see you've got a pile of dirty dishes mouldering in the sink again! blush

innerstrength100 Mon 05-Jan-15 10:58:09

*Outwiththecrowd" - thank you so much for these thoughts. "This too shall pass" has always been my mantra and I have held onto that thought in recent months, and will continue to do so. It is just taking longer than I want...and yes, crying does release some pressure, even if just for a little while. The tears keep coming and coming, but one day, when this too HAS passed, I will look back and realise I am better. Thanks for posting.

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