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Has anyone lost friends/family due to their faith?

(26 Posts)
Dynasty Sun 09-Mar-14 17:24:34

My family are much more distant with me since I was baptised, they are all staunch atheists. I have noticed other atheist friend are too. I'm not preachy and don't really discuss my faith unless asked to, but I can tell and barrier has gone up. Feeling a bit sad ....

DidoTheDodo Sun 09-Mar-14 18:13:08

My dad was a lifelong Christian, I am Christian, but my mum and sister are definitely not. It's not caused a rift, but they don't really understand my POV, and I really miss my dad.

capsium Sun 09-Mar-14 19:21:39

I've been thinking about this.

In one way yes, you believe different things to them and your interests may well change.

In another way I think being a Christian encouraged you to reflect on your behaviour more so hopefully you can become a better version of yourself. More helpful, generous and kinder for example. Not that you can't possess these qualities without being a Christian just that practising being a Christian has helped me to reflect on these sort of issues.

So you might become a better friend, relative and hopefully in time other people will recognise a change for the better.

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme Sun 09-Mar-14 19:31:30

I worked with a JW for a while and apparently his friends were so convinced we were having an affair that they knocked on my door, invited themselves in and began to preach at me about how it wasn't allowed, he'd be kicked out of his family etc.

I let them finish, I was so shocked. Then I told then that they'd got it completely wrong, I was insulted and I kicked them out of the house! Friend got both barrels for suggesting it and as he then moved away I never had to deal with him or them again. Knobbers. Live by your daft rules if you have to but you're not bloody well ramming it down my throat!

capsium Sun 09-Mar-14 19:32:01

^ being a practising Christian I should say.

anchories Sun 09-Mar-14 19:34:31

Perhaps we can all pray that they accept you as you are now?

atthestrokeoftwelve Sun 09-Mar-14 21:51:00

Religion has caused massive problems in my family, my sister and mother are born again, I am an athiest and my niece who was brought up in strict faith but now athiest has been disowned by her mother. It's all a mess. My athiest niece is not allowed to see her sister's children for fear of giving them athiest ideas.

capsium Sun 09-Mar-14 21:53:27

That is sad atthestroke.

atthestrokeoftwelve Sun 09-Mar-14 21:57:13

It's not pleasant. I don't have a great deal of respect for religion.

capsium Sun 09-Mar-14 22:11:37

I can't imagine disowning your own child, wouldn't want to even imagine it.

atthestrokeoftwelve Sun 09-Mar-14 22:15:23

But to some god is more important than family.

capsium Sun 09-Mar-14 22:20:19

Yes, but why would you give up on your family?

I take God being more important as not doing something wrong just because your family wants you to.

atthestrokeoftwelve Sun 09-Mar-14 22:25:24

My sister thinks that Satan has taken over the family members who are athiests.
She prays that we will find salvation because she knows that she has the truth and we are being misguided.

capsium Sun 09-Mar-14 22:33:22

What completely? How bad are you?

atthestrokeoftwelve Sun 09-Mar-14 22:38:15

Bad? I'm not bad. She teaches at a big christian school, the same school that gave a lesson to 5 year olds before christmas telling them that Sanat is not real, and may actually be the devil in disguise, even showing them that Satan is an anagram of Santa just to prove it.

AntiJamDidi Sun 09-Mar-14 22:40:46

I have lost a friend because of her faith.

When we met she was a spiritualist. I was Catholic but never once talked to her about it without her specifically asking (and I no longer properly believe). I supported her through some tough times while we were at uni and in the years following. She discovered God 4 years ago and since then she has pretty much cut me out because I'm not as involved in the church as she is. I had a very tough time 2 years ago and the only person I reached out to was her - her only advice was to pray. She gave no practical help (to be fair she lives too far away to do much practically) and when I told her that I was too angry with God for prayer to help me, she stopped talking to me. I haven't heard from her since. I can only assume that her relationship with God means that she has to cut out any friends that aren't as devout as she is.

capsium Sun 09-Mar-14 22:41:40

Oh. Does not go with the St Nicholas account then, ideas of charity, giving in secret then.

Sounds like they will have to live a very separate kind of life.

atthestrokeoftwelve Sun 09-Mar-14 22:42:07

I couldn't be a close friend to a religious person.

capsium Sun 09-Mar-14 22:47:11

I see, atthestroke sounds like you have been badly hurt by the experiences with your family. I can understand you drawing connections, not all Christians are the same though.

Bagofnutsnbolts Sun 09-Mar-14 22:56:18

It's a funny thing religion, it can bring out both the best and worst in folk. I think there is a big difference between having a faith and being religious. OP I'm guessing your family just feel a bit out of their comfort zone with you having found a faith, I'm sure in time they will see you for being you, and will relax a bit more when they realise your not out to convert them! Belief and nonbelief are such personal aspects to being human, and have very sadly been responsible for so many wars and conflict....

atthestrokeoftwelve Mon 10-Mar-14 06:39:04

Bagofnuts I can't see how non- belief has been responsible for wars and conflict. Men have fought over religion, but not un-religion.

capsium Mon 10-Mar-14 07:34:55

Belief and what is held important in life consists of more than just religion though. Men fight over power, land and resources too.

atthestrokeoftwelve Mon 10-Mar-14 07:36:10

I agree, but you did suggest that war happens over non- belief.

capsium Mon 10-Mar-14 07:37:52

It was Bag who mentioned wars atthestroke.

atthestrokeoftwelve Mon 10-Mar-14 07:39:53

Apologies Capsium. Still have my sleepy head on. More coffee called for!!

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