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Cool Choirs, Clappy Choruses, Cringy Coffee: Religion Chat Thread No 5

(1000 Posts)
madhairday Sun 09-Sep-12 16:16:19

I thought seeing as our other thread has gone somewhere into the oblivion that is old MN pages, I would start us up again anew for a new term. This is a place for those who are Christians (and anyone who's not, we're not an exclusive little club) grin to chat about life, theology, church, any other stuff and of course Graham Kendrick, as nickel would not forgive me if I forgot to mention him grin

So all welcome, old and new, it would be fun to chat and chew over anything that comes to mind. Lurkers say hello!

Anyone got a nice juicy topic to get the ball rolling then? Or if not come say hi anyway and tell us how you are doing. smile

MaryBS Mon 24-Dec-12 13:43:18

Well done JC2! Nickel, think you're just going to have to "suck it up", being the season of good will. That doesn't mean you have to take him back though. And I think it only fair to point out to them just how let down you feel by their actions!

nickelbabylyinginamanger Mon 24-Dec-12 13:50:35

i don't think we will be taking him back.
i hope.

i would love to point out how let down we feel! i feel like it's hitting my head against a brick wall with them - after mum saying that he'd been told he should go to NTC's christmas services instead of ours, and me saying to her how our services should come first because he's officially a member of our choir and that's where his priority should lie, then him never turning up, and then him being insistent that he would get the solo, then being told he wouldn't, but then him not turning up (i am convinced it's a cause of), he's supposed to have finished his rehearsals for this play for the holidays, but he's not come to practice, then the whole saga with NTC and the surplice/blue ribbon - mum knows how annoyed I was over that, and still she doesn't show loyalty.

and yet, all i got from her was "we're going to go on as we are for now and then review it all after christmas" - and then not going on as they are, because that would mean coming to services and practices wherever they could.

and on top of all that - i checked NTC's services today, and their 9lessons was on Saturday, and they had no choral services at all yesterday - so he could have come to ours.

DutchOmainthestable Mon 24-Dec-12 14:00:30

You know what? I wouldn't do anything at all. If you happen to see JC1 or his mum, I would pretend that they never were involved with your choir. Just be pleasant, talk nicely and should they have the cheek to ask about his wages, I would say that you would sort that out asap..of course.
My guess is that they will cross the street not to have to speak to you.

nickelbabylyinginamanger Mon 24-Dec-12 14:08:51


that seems so final!

but you are right, that's the best thing to do, isn't it, be polite but don't mention it.

nickelbabylyinginamanger Mon 24-Dec-12 15:43:00

she's just posted on fb that "apart from midnight mass that's me done"

i have resisted the urge to comment......

niminypiminy Mon 24-Dec-12 18:29:58

I've just come back from the most depressingly awful carol service at my church. Here's some of the things wrong with it...

We were singing along to CDs ( this is what we normally do despite my having offered to explore other possibilities as the result of training as an ALM Music Minister). The CDs were of cathedral choirs, so pitched very high for people not used to singing to sing along with. And bloody awful, lugubriously slow recordings. So people weren't really able to sing along, or if they did, it was hard to keep time with the recordings.

The choice of carols was uninspired. If you're going to use CDs you might choose something that is beautiful but lesser known and say 'let's just listen to this beautiful carol in quietness', or you could use other recordings that were different in style, and could help people sound more joyful instead of doleful.

The attempts at interaction were embarrassing eg 'who knows what myrrh is for? Does anybody know?'. There were prayers led from the front as per usual. The vicar hadn't worked out in advance who was going to do the readings so asked for volunteers which made people look at their laps.

And finally he didn't even advertise the service tomorrow . It's my betting he doesn't want anybody to come (there were less than 30 people there even though it is our only carol service) so he can go home.

The whole thing made me feel both sad and angry - this is one of the few services that unchurched people come to - can't we do better than that?

Bluetinkerbell Mon 24-Dec-12 18:46:55

Oh that's horrible niminy sad
We had a really good crib service! Had almost 120 people in church, we had to get extra chairs...
Our lay reader did really well, as he replaced me as I'm on maternity leave. smile

DandyDan Mon 24-Dec-12 21:46:51

Crib service was chocka - about 400. It will be quieter at Midnight. A calmer Christmas for us all this year, but sadder without my Mum.

nickelbabylyinginamanger Tue 25-Dec-12 01:08:32

sad niminy

<hugs> dandy.

I'm sitting in the tower having just done a very successful midnight mass.
guess who turned up at 1/4 past 11 expecting to sing the solo? no communication beforehand asking if he could. dh said no, you haven't been to any services at all. jc1 threw all his robes on the floor (got told off and had to pick them up) then left in a mardy.
the solos who had turned up to rehearsals and services and earned the solo did brilliantly. there was a line she used to struggle on and she sang it perfectly.

so all in all a fabulous service. grin

DutchOmainthestable Tue 25-Dec-12 10:06:50

Good for dh. I would have been so sad if he had caved in. It's sad that you have invested so much effort into teaching him, without now having the benefit of it, but it will be a useful lesson for your jc1 to learn. Left in a mardy indeed. Ha.

nickelbabylyinginamanger Tue 25-Dec-12 17:31:11

well least there was a chosen soloist for the part and not me. it would have made it easier had he kicked off.
i really hope this is a lesson learned. smile

I'm having a lovely Christmas. we were at frinsted this morning where i got the chance to do the solo grin and ee've spent the afternoon opening presents and cking/eating.

funny things happen at Christmas
it's now 2 years since we started this chat thread after Christmas eve issues!

TuoComeLetUsAdoreHim Wed 26-Dec-12 13:12:51

Happy Birthday to Christian Chat! smile

A HUGE well done to your DH for his handling of the JC issue, Nickel.

Niminy... Oh, that's awful about the carol service... it really sounds as if your vicar's heart really isn't in it, which is terribly sad. I hope you had a good Christmas, anyway.

sad DandyDan.

We were meant to be having our Christmas Eve Christingle service outside since ongoing building work in the cathedral means that most of the building is inaccessible. This is normally a big service - last year we had at least 500 people for it - so outside seemed like the best option (as well as a way of taking the Christmas story to last-minute shoppers and passers-by). But by midday the rain had settled to a nice steady 'cats and dogs' level and was showing no sign of letting up, so we moved back inside, and - unsurprisingly (since it had been advertised as taking place outside!) - had far fewer people than last year. Still, DD2 took a - ahem - 'starring' role (as the Star of Bethlehem, of course!), and there was a suitably festive atmosphere, and even DD1 admitted that it had been an enjoyable service. Oh, and look out for DD2 on BBC4 in June... They are making a series about cathedrals, in which the Christingle should feature (if I remember to take back the permission letter, which I've just noticed is still sitting on my desk...oops!).

I managed to get everyone else into bed in time to sneak back to Midnight Mass, which was really beautiful (and absolutely packed): a moment of calm in an otherwise fairly manic few days.

thanksamillion Wed 26-Dec-12 18:15:55

Happy Christmas everyone and happy birthday thread grin

niminy that sounds like such a let down,how frustrating.

We've had an odder than normal Christmas. Yesterday was just all over the place! We went back to our old village for the morning service and took a couple of people from the new village with us. The service was good and then we were invited for lunch with the Pastor. Then on the way home we got stopped by someone else and invited in to their house for a coffe which turned into another meal hmm and we finally got back at about 4.30pm. I'd planned to do the turkey etc yesterday afternoon but postponed it until today! Because most people here aren't celebrating yet it's felt a bit flat.

Well done Mr nickel on not caving in to JC1.

TuoComeLetUsAdoreHim Thu 27-Dec-12 10:34:07

Millie... that does sound like a bit of an odd Christmas, but also in the spirit of the thing, if you know what I mean. I hope you had a good Boxing/Christmas Day yesterday.

Niminy... I've said this before elsewhere, I know, but I just thought about it again this morning while walking the dog. For the future, it might be worth finding out if you have a local(-ish) brass band. I'm willing to bet that they would be willing to provide accompaniment for a carol service - and you wouldn't even need the full band necessarily (unless you have a congregation of hundreds) - 8-12 musicians would be enough to provide decent musical backing... and it sounds kind of festive too, imho. Mind you, sounds like persuading the vicar might be the issue... hmm

MaryBS Fri 28-Dec-12 11:08:55

Good idea about the brass band - Salvation Army might be willing to do it?

niminypiminy Fri 28-Dec-12 20:31:35

Tuo that's a good idea about the brass band (maybe you could come with yours wink). Actually the our incumbent also leads the services at a tiny 12th century chapel which belonged to a medieval leper hospital -it's the oldest building in Cambridge, amazingly enough seeing it is surrounded by the Cambridge retail park and council housing estates. Anyway there is a carol service there accompanied by a brass band. But the chapel is owned by the Cambridge preservation society and isn't actually managed by the parish, so things happen slightly differently there - he robes for services there for example which he never does for services 'at home'. So the I'd be surprised if the brass band was anything to do with him.

I veer between thinking he is demoralised and thinking that he is just going through the motions. He certainly doesn't find it easy to take on board other people's ideas. I don't know. When we were talking about it after Christmqs day service (total attendance 7) DH said 'he's not mad, or alcoholic, or trying to seduce the parishioners, or steal church funds, and he always turns up and does his thing - so, you know, from the diocese's point of view he's not a problem'. And that's probably right. <rolls eyes>

Anyway, I'm writing from a house knee deep in tissues as both boys have had colds over Christmas. DS2 seems to have been coughing solidly for three days - he's had nearly all the salbutamol in the house...

Millie, your Christmas reminded me of when I went on an exchange to Poland quite soon after the fall of communism. Everybody was so incredibly hospitable! One day I had to eat three lunches because three different lots of people would not take no for an answer - three substantial polish lunches, oh my! - it was very humbling considering tough things were there then.

thanksamillion Mon 31-Dec-12 19:24:53

Happy New Year everyone!

niminy my Grandparents used to live up the road from that leper hospital chapel! I remember going there when I was little smile

We're off to the city tomorrow for a few days break from the fishbowl village. It's been so intense since we got here I'm really looking forward to it. Also I haven't been out of the village (except to the next village) for over two weeks and I'm starting to get a bit twitchy.

niminypiminy Wed 02-Jan-13 13:56:31

Milly that's an amazing coincidence!

Hope your break in the city is just what you need.

Happy new year, everyone !

MadHairDay Sat 05-Jan-13 11:40:40

Happy new year to you all!

Well done nickel's dh smile

Had a good rest at parents and a nice quiet Christmas and birthday (NYE). Not healing as quick as I'd like though sad

Happy birthday to the thread!

niminypiminy Sat 05-Jan-13 12:16:30

Hey MHD!!! Glad to see you back - though that's crap that your recovery is going so slowly. But v v v good to hear that you've had a restful time and so thankful that you're here with us again. And happy birthday to you!

Now must prepare something around epiphany for the children to do during all- age tomorrow - I see some stars in the distance, methinks.

nickelbabe Wed 09-Jan-13 15:14:21

sorry i haven't posted for a while - i keep being here when i'm on my phone and it'd hard to formulate proper sentences when the thing keeps changing words!
plus, i wrote out a long post for the salvation army thing and went to press post and the broadband cut out. i got annoyed and couldn't remember what i'd put!

mhd - you heal that slowly because that's what your body needs.

thanksamillion Mon 14-Jan-13 07:49:40

Hi all hope you're enjoying your snow if you've got some this morning! We've still got ours!

MadHairDay Mon 14-Jan-13 12:21:28

Ours has nearly all gone and it's all sleety and slushy. Huh.

How is everyone?

nickelbabe Mon 14-Jan-13 14:04:32

we got a tiny weeny bit of snow, but it had all gone by the time I got to Busy Bees. booo.

i emailed the team rector's PA asking if I could have details to contact the new vicar so I could "interview" him for the next magazine and apparently he's not allowed to be contactable until he's been licensed.
argh!! so frustrating! the magazine's deadline is the 20th Jan, the licensing is the 28th Jan, and the magazine will go to print on 1st Feb!!
so I'll miss out on content from the new vicar for the sake of 3 days!! sad

I really want to push it and get my interview, but I've also been told that he and his wife are expecting a baby, so it's important for them to have "us" time before all the hard work starts. sad

MadHairDay Mon 14-Jan-13 16:25:29

I do kind of get that nickel, coming from that side of things as it were. A lot of clergy don't take enough time between and get straight into things which can have repercussions later, especially for the family. If they do take the time, they are much fresher to the new role and ready to go. There is a period of letting go the old and revving up for the new (did you see what I did there) grin and that's important. 3 days is annoying but I'm sure people won't mind waiting til the next magazine.

I do know a family who've just moved straight into their new post with about 2 days off to move (vicar) and the family feel completely overburdened with it all, she really should have taken more time but was pushed into doing it straight away. There's been no time to settle in, let alone feel ready for this new role.

I feel for you too though! An interview would be lovely. You could do a 'watch this space' promising a great interview next month?

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