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Our family dog died last night, im a bit shocked that im so upset

(24 Posts)
Mamazon Tue 21-Jul-09 22:01:17

her name was Rosie and she was a lovely English bull mastiff. she was the most placid affectionate teddy bear and all the children adored her.
she was only a fortnight from her 8th birthday.

We knew she was unwell and we all knew that she had reached a stage where we would probably have to make the hard decision to put her to sleep. unfortunatly our vet appointment was for thursday, she died during the night. sad

My parents are both disabled so i had to take her body to be cremated today. it really was one of the most difficult things i've had to do.
I knew i'd be upest when she passed but im surprised at just how upset i've been.

The children have been upset too. DD seems to be very mkatter of fact about it. DS was saying "but why did she have to die, i loved Rosie"
DD said " yeah but it doesn't work like that. dogs don't get old like mums do"

made me smile.

we'll get her ashes back in a few days. not sure what we'll do with them.

ipiratethief Tue 21-Jul-09 22:05:25

oh bless, it is bloody hard and very upsetting to lose a beloved pet, in any circumstances.

They bring back memories for us too, I am sorry you have had to deal with this.

It's the live we put in, and the love they give back so unconditionally.

It was my cat's anniversary on sunday, and I still love and miss him. ten yrs on.

hope you feel better soon, and can think of him with happy smiles.

ipiratethief Tue 21-Jul-09 22:06:12

think of 'her' duh, sorry.

differentID Tue 21-Jul-09 22:07:04

Mamazon, my darling cat did that to me 7 years ago. We had finally steeled ourselves to have him put to sleep when we had a phone call from the vets to say he had gone in his sleep.

There was a sense of massive guilt and upset, but also a tinge of relief that we hadn't had to "sign the death warrant" so to speak.

I have Honey's ashes in a little wooden cat shaped casket on top of the piano- where he used to sit watching mesmile

smugmumofboys Tue 21-Jul-09 22:09:40

Sorry to hear that. It can really catch you unawares. I was distraught when our much-loved cat died two years ago. Really sobby.

Just let it out and have a good cry. (My DSes were completely matter-of-fact as well).

ipiratethief Tue 21-Jul-09 22:09:53

I have my cats ashes too. In fact i have two cats ashes, (can't part with them).

ilovemydogandmrobama Tue 21-Jul-09 22:10:07

sad sad I thought my heart would break when my Golden Retriever had to be put down. Didn't have kids at the time, so didn't have to think about anyone else's feelings other than my own, but what about her ashes somewhere she liked to walk? Or a holiday that was special? I took DD (Darling Dog wink to Cornwall and scattered his ashes where he loved to swim, me and DP said a few words about him, and then another dog came over and lifted his leg shock, but hey, that's the world of canine...smile

FlappyTheBat Tue 21-Jul-09 22:10:14

differentID, hope you don't mind me asking but where about did you get the casket?

I've had my cat's ashes in a little cardboard box in my wardrobe for almost 7 years - we've moved 3 times since he died so doesn't feel right to scatter them in a garden he never knew.

differentID Tue 21-Jul-09 22:13:04

it actually came from the crem that did the burning. Will find out which one.

thumbwitch Tue 21-Jul-09 22:13:42

if it makes you feel any better, I had a baby fledgling sparrow in my room overnight - it had fallen from its nest and I made a nest for it on my bedroom window sill outside - no parents came back so I brought it inside overnight (too cold for it) and was feeding it. It seemed to be doing well, it woke at first light and I fed it, then I went back to sleep and when I woke up again later it was quiet - I thought it had gone back to sleep but it had died.

I was sooooo upset. And I had only known it for ~ 12 hours.

thumbwitch Tue 21-Jul-09 22:14:55

sorry, am so blush - for you and the loss of your dog.

ipiratethief Tue 21-Jul-09 22:17:54

sad, i know that feeling thumbwitch, have done similar.

FlappyTheBat Tue 21-Jul-09 22:19:22

Thank you dID.

Mamazon, I took some of my dog's ashes ( parents got her when I was 14) up to Arthur's Seat in Edinburgh because that's where I used to take her for walks then we planted a rosebush in a big tub with the rest of her ashes there.

I'm sure Rosie wouldn't mind if you scattered some or all of her ashes or did what we did.

ipiratethief Tue 21-Jul-09 22:19:29

I htinkit's just a very pure and tranquil love that you have for a pet isn't it. It is a huge wrench.

Rindercella Tue 21-Jul-09 22:22:01

I am really sorry for you. It is amazing the impact these animals can have on our lives - and how upset we can be on losing them. Our family dog Tessa died nearly 10 years ago and I still can't go to my parents' without thinking of her - the house seems so empty (they chose not to replace her).

When she was put down, at 15 years old, we knew it was the best thing for her as there was no way she could carry on without further distress and pain, but it was just so fecking sad. I spent my teens mucking about with her, running around the farm with her, that the house just seemed wrong, empty, without her. I always thought that when she died we would feel her presence there, but we never have.

Time is a great healer, but there will always be a special place in your heart for Rosie sad

oneopinionatedmother Tue 21-Jul-09 22:26:28

i love my dog to bits, and would be to pieces without her, though she is often neglected now the babies are here.

they are a family member and it is not silly to be deeply upset when they die



Poor you.

our family dogs are buried underneath flowering trees, so we can think of them when the tree blossoms.

differentID Tue 21-Jul-09 22:33:07

It's a place called summerleaze pet crem and it's in gwent. I can't get onto their website, though

Mamazon Tue 21-Jul-09 22:34:02

the kids wanted to bury her in the garden but she's just way too big.

think we'll maybe plant a rose or something as a memorial for her.

I knew i'd be upset. its just how much its hit me. I had proper tears and everything. she wasn't my dog, i'd already left home when they got her. but i saw her almost everyday and since my parents couldn't it was always me that trook her to the vets, gave her a bath etc.

<<goes off to blub some more>>

differentID Tue 21-Jul-09 22:38:14

and that's perfectly ok.

Flappy- I have put a couple of pics on my profile, if you want a look.

The next tabby to pass away, Paris, got a pale blue marble urn and my mother has him on a sideboard.

Mintyy Tue 21-Jul-09 22:41:20

Very sorry to hear about Rosie, Mamazon. Under 8 is young to die, isn't it, even for a pedigree dog? It is perfectly understandable that you are so upset. Do you have some photos of her that you can put up around the house? Tis very sad sad.

FlappyTheBat Tue 21-Jul-09 23:31:37

Mamazon, the rose we got for our dog was called "sweet dreams", has pale yellow flowers.
I left home when our dog was 4, she was still my dog though and I loved her lots. It doesn't matter, dogs are a huge part of a family and you do miss them.

completely unmumsnetty but (((((hugs)))))

dID, thank you so much, I will try a few pet crems and see if they will sell one for me.

Hobnobfanatic Tue 21-Jul-09 23:47:58

So sorry to hear your news. I've lost so many pets over the years and it never gets easier - least of all with children - dealing with their grief and life-and-death questions.

They really do steal your hearts.

I hope the tears give way to smiles and fond memories soon. x

Blondeshavemorefun Thu 23-Jul-09 13:33:55

so sorry to hear about you loss of rosie

it is heart breaking when pets die as they are part of the family ((HUG))

junglist1 Fri 24-Jul-09 10:29:54

Pets don't argue or hurt your feelings, they're loyal no matter what. They really are part of the family, and I've never trusted anyone who doesn't treat their pets as such. Sorry for your loss

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