I hate loathe and detest cats yet I now appear to have 5 of them.

[Quattrocento]

You don't want to know the concatenation of events that has led to this unmitigated disaster.

They leave hairs everywhere. There is no surface in the house that is hair-free. The house is now cleaned every day and we have to have a hair-removal-roller positioned strategically at every exit. They make messes. They scratch my sofas and tables and chairs. They run all over the house and I have to run after them and find them under beds.

There is something wrong with my life. I don't like cats yet we appear to have five of them now. I like dogs yet we don't now have one. I am entertaining dark thoughts of a watery grave. For the cats, I mean, not me.

I have bought them toys and a scratching post to preserve my curtains. I hope that two of them will be given away soon otherwise I will go insane. It still leaves three though, which is three too many.

I really really don't like them. The children of course, love the disgusting unhygienic creatures. What can I do?

[Hassled]

Actually I really really do want to know the concatenation of events that has led to this unmitigated disaster .

I love cats but any more than 2 is too many, IMO.

[NigellaTheOriginal]

hypnotism?

[TooTicky]

Sympathy. We once had fourteen. We now have one and even her hair drives me mad - the way she pulls bits out and spits them on the floor

[derelicte]

I need to know how you've ended up with five cats when you don't like them. I think you're in denial.

You, Madam, are a Cat Lover. [Jeremy Kyle face]

[Quattrocento]

Hypnotism for me, the cats or the children? Oh, me I suppose. I'm the odd one out in all this.

[bella29]

It's like when I eat a big bar of galaxy and wonder why I haven't lost any weight on the scales the next morning. Give us a d! Give us an e! Give us an n! Give us an i! Give us an a! Give us an l! Put it all together, what do you get? A cat hater with 5 cats! (Sorry, it's been a long day...)

[differentID]

you do know that cats know who don't like them and as a result go out of their way to irritate?

[Quattrocento]

14!!! 14 Cats!!! My worst nightmare.

Oh lordy/

Tell me how you got rid of them all.

Denial - no not me, can't stand cats. Denial is a river in Africa, anyway

[iotasbadasscat]

I AM CLEAN I LICK MY ARSE WOT IS YOUR PROBLEM?
BE GRATEFUL WHEN I GIVE YOU A PRESENT OF MY HAIRBALL
HAR HAR HAR

COUGH COUGH HACK SPEW

SEE

I'M GRATE AND NICE TO YOU

[wannaBe]

I want to know how you ended up with 5 cats.

I am huuuuge animal lover and have more animals than most but even I would draw the line at 5 cats. I have two and that is more than enough.

[Quattrocento]

Iota - I am sure you live with me, don't you? Are you the one responsible for ruining my curtains? Cos I never worked out which one of them did that.

Wannabe - I blame DH. He is a catlover. Thinks children should have a pet. He introduced the first cat. Then DD's friend's cat had kittens and family moving to NYC. DD pleaded for a kitten to keep the first one company. She chose a female that had allegedly been spayed. Allegedly being the operative word. Then four kittens arrived one morning.

We got rid of two but then the family decided one was quite enough and returned one

[edam]

Ah, the old 'we are leaving the country, please can you look after the poor cat who will be abandoned and alone and unhappy, she's been spayed, honest' trick.

If you really are going to give two away, and you happen to live in Herts/Beds/Bucks/N London, I could maybe help you out...

[Quattrocento]

Oh Edam!!

Could you really? Wow. We think we've got homes for two already but there's still three one that is surpkus to requirements ...

[tink123]

my friend has over 20, albeit mostly feral, and only a few come in house.

[edam]

Quattro, sorry, been away for the weekend. YES I might well be interested - can you CAT me?