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Need to rehome a cat - 7 yo will be devastated. Advice?

(7 Posts)
Mamapotter2008 Mon 25-Jan-16 09:03:23

9 months ago we trundle along to a local rescue to choose a cat. We leave with 2 cats - apparently a bonded pair. I'm less happy about the number of cats than my husband and daughter are.

The cats are most definitely not bonded. They hiss at and chase eachother. They fight. One lives upstairs, the other downstairs. I've tried all the things you should to have them getting on better. They aren't interested. I wanted to rehome one, but my husband likes the one I'd rehome.

One of them goes outside and has access to that whenever she likes. We hardly see her, and she fights with all the local cats. She's cost me a fortune in vets bills. This is the one I'd rehome.

7 weeks ago my husband left, and he is being a right knobweasle over finances. That's for another thread. I'm on a much much lower budget than before, and it's likely that at some point soon I will need to move into much smaller accommodation which will make it harder to keep separate areas for the cats.

I think I'll need to rehome one of them when I move, but now I'm under this financial pressure, I know it would be much better for me to make this decision now because it will at last halve the cost (the one I'm thinking of rehoming cost me nearly £600 in vets bills since I got her - that's after insurance picked up their tab). Especially given I'm under a lot of stress and with the cold weather they are often both in, chasing eachother, hissing, growling, fighting and running up the curtains.

Problem is, my 7 year old will be devastated, and she's already got enough to deal with seeing as her father is being a dick head. I just don't know if there's ever a good time to do this - when we move won't be much better either.

Short of turning up to my next mediation session with my ex and bringing the cat with me for him to take some responsibility for it, what should I do?

gBean Mon 25-Jan-16 09:06:43

I'd try and get him to take the cat. He likes it, your Dd will still see it.

Mamapotter2008 Mon 25-Jan-16 09:12:13

He won't. He lives in an apartment in the city centre (200 miles away from us, once again another thread). All I'll get is a lecture about being a crap mum who doesn't put her daughter first.

gBean Mon 25-Jan-16 09:20:23

He sounds like a real peach. Tbh I'd contact the rescue and tell them they are definitely NOT a bonded pair and explain the difficulties. Hopefully they'll take her back. Your Dd will be upset but she'll get over it. Just do the whole "a lovely family will look after her because she isn't having a nice time with the other cat so it's not fair on her".

Your ex has no say in this. I wouldn't even discuss it with him.

mrsjskelton Mon 25-Jan-16 09:22:29

Get rid of the cat you want to get rid of. It's your finances and you were told they're bonded. You'll just have to talk to your 7yo and keep them informed - maybe ask them to help find a new home? At the end of the day, kids do get over these things - tough at first but you know what's right! If your DP loves the bloody cat so much then post it to him!

timtam23 Wed 27-Jan-16 22:26:39

I would contact the rescue and ask if they would take one of the cats back, a lot of rescues seem to have it as part of the adoption conditions that the cat should be returned to them if the situation breaks down. I'm sorry that your daughter will be unhappy about it, is she fond of the non-fighting one (as it sounds like that's the one you would keep)

Mamapotter2008 Thu 28-Jan-16 16:15:52

Decision been made. Rescue is taking her back. I feel like shit because my daughter is devastated. She is fond of the one we are keeping, but the one that's going is her favourite.

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