What is more RUDE? (regards to Excuse me)

[QuintessentialShadow]

The "Excuse me, please" thread reminded me of an incident recently, and I am wonder, what is more rude, in the following scenario:

Imagine a queue for the tills at Tesco Express which is so long it is diving the shop floor in half. Somebody needs to get through, and says "Excuse me can I get past" what is most rude, to say excuse me without the "please", or for another bystander to pipe up "Excuse me please" - thus commenting that my politeness was inadequate.

Isnt it more rude to correct an adult and ask her to add please to her request as if she was a child?

[DiscoDizzy]

Someone did this to me once, I hadn't considered it rude before that, but perhaps some would take it to be. Also think its rude for someone to point it out, but if they didn't I would've continued to say it and potentially sound rude, IYSWIM

[QuintessentialShadow]

I am not generally a rude person. But I had a full shopping basket in one hand, carrying my youngest on the other arm, and toddler with me too. I was clearly struggling.

I found it really rude and unhelpful that a stranger would chose to make a point about my lack of "please" instead of stepping aside and let me pass.

I can see your point, but at the same time I feel it shouldnt be the job of strangers to educate other grown ups. It is advice where none is sought, surely?

[DiscoDizzy]

Oh I agree, some people are like this, my father is one of them, he's full of informing people how rude they are but yet he is rude when he makes demands of other people.

[CatWithKittens]

I very recently did it automatically and without thinking when asked without a please to pass the salt and pepper at a dinner party. I'm so used to saying it to the children if they forget "please" that it just slipped out. Fortunately my neighbour and his wife had children of th same age so was able to laugh at it.