Talk

Advanced search

Could someone very kind please advise...

(7 Posts)
Lebranic Sun 08-Oct-17 12:57:34

I am easing myself back into work after many years as a stay at home slave - my youngest has recently started school.
I used to be a fairly in demand Yoga teacher. I am trying to create a flyer for my new yoga class but I'm struggling.
Does this composition look OK and
could you think of any better wording?
Thanking you massively in advance
......

Scientifically Proven Benefits of Yoga :

Improves the immune system
Improves physical and mental performance
Effective treatment for lower back pain
Increases Gray Brain Matter
Reduces depression, anxiety and stress
Reduces emotional eating

Lebranic Sun 08-Oct-17 12:59:21

Oops I tried to remove the photo of the flyer as I thought that wouldn't be allowed.
I will report!

Quickqu Sun 08-Oct-17 13:01:29

Grey should have an e not an a in the UK.

I would add something about all levels welcome, even beginners, or words to that effect. When I started yoga my main concern was not joining a class full of pros and looking an idiot!

Lebranic Sun 08-Oct-17 13:03:41

Thank you! Yes you are absolutely right I completely forgot about beginners welcome.
Yes I thought that too but everywhere on the Web it is referenced 'Gray Matter'

Lebranic Sun 08-Oct-17 13:08:57

OK I have changed Gray to Grey and added the beginners welcome!
Thank you very much, so helpful.
Is the wording very clunky?

Lebranic Sun 08-Oct-17 18:06:06

Hopeful bump!

bluebiro Sun 08-Oct-17 21:35:18

I would also say that “Grey Brain Matter” should not have capital letters and I think the title “Scientifically Proven…” would be better without capitals too. Perhaps change “improve” to “strengthen” before “immune system”, just to vary the words.

However, I’m not sure that all of these things have truly been scientifically proven, as some have only been suggested by some studies. I would be less likely to follow up on a flyer if it were claiming things to be definitely true when they’re only possibilities. I would prefer it to read something like this (and I don’t think you lose any impact phrasing it like this):

Potential benefits of yoga:
May strengthen the immune system
Improves physical and mental performance
Can relieve lower back pain
May increase grey brain matter
Reduces depression, anxiety and stress
Reduces emotional eating

Agree with adding the bit about beginners – I found classes very daunting at first!

Good luck for going back to work.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now