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What is the etiquette with inviting siblings/ young babies to parties?

(14 Posts)
Jujubean77 Sat 19-Sep-09 17:42:45

DD will be 3 soon and inevitably our friends all have younger children and babies in tow. Many of whom are not really "known" to DD. I have no problem with the 18m - 2yo but some have crawling babies and newborns that will not really be able to get involved with the entertainment and may even be really difficult for the Mum to juggle it all.

I don't want to offend by just inviting one child in the family - I suppose my question is, would it be offensive to do so?

NoahDear Sat 19-Sep-09 17:43:25

have it at the weekend and say as they arrive
" thanks please leave your number wiht dh and we wil call if we need you"

then shut the door

bibbitybobbityhat Sat 19-Sep-09 17:46:11

The problem is that some 3 year olds will not want to be left at someone else's house without a parent. I took my 6 year old ds to a party today and one of his classmates was really shy about being left and wanting her dad to stay with her.

Jujubean77 Sat 19-Sep-09 17:48:09

I know - I totally understand that. I think I probably have to make all welcome...

waitingforfanjo Sun 20-Sep-09 14:21:12

I don't think many three-year-olds would want to be left on their own at a party. And You wouldn't want to be in charge of them all, either! Most parents will stay at that age & I think unless they have someone who can mind the baby, then you'll have to expect that people may have to bring them all. It would be polite of them to ask you if it's ok first, thought, I would.

My son is 4 soon & is having his first 'proper' party. i've invited children from his nursery class (but obviously not their siblings since we don't know them) but there's about 6 other non-school friends invited, where I've invited their younger siblings as well because I sort of know them as a family. And so that they don't have to find babysitters etc.

bigstripeytiger Sun 20-Sep-09 14:29:22

I think 3 is too young to be left. I would invite the child that you want to come, and let the mums decide how to handle it ie leaving the younger child with the dad, or ask you if they can bring the younger child.

I dont think is is offensive to not invite the whole family to a childs party.

ThingOne Sun 20-Sep-09 15:27:50

I invited younger siblings until my DS1 started school. Often both parents came which made it a really nice family party.

It won't be hard for a parent that's staying "to juggle it all" as that's what they do the rest of the time.

But if you don't want to invite them, don't.

MrsBadger Sun 20-Sep-09 16:35:43

I had a cutoff - non-mobiles were welcome to stay, in sole care of their parent (ie on lap or asleep in basket)
crawlers were not as they will get trodden on
toddlers

like bigstripeytiger I never invite 'familes', just the one child that is dd's friend and if anyone else wnats to come they can ring me

MrsBadger Sun 20-Sep-09 16:37:00

lost a line there hmm

toddler not unless specifically named on invite

serenity Sun 20-Sep-09 16:49:32

If you have it at a weekend then I'd imagine most parents will come with just the invited child. If you do it after school/nursery, prepare for the siblings (we had to turn parties down because certain parents just didn't get the fact that not everyone has retired parents etc to do that sort of babysitting)

DeathbyDora Sun 20-Sep-09 17:04:50

As an invitee, I would usually only take the child who was known/invited and leave the other one with my DH (assuming he was free).
If I wanted to take both I would ask the host first if it was ok.

curlytoes Sun 20-Sep-09 17:12:25

I agree with thingone - mums with more than one child will be used to juggling their needs. Sometimes it can be a bit frantic but that's ok. TBH all our NCT group have just had 3 year old parties. I've been to about 10 since the summer started and younger siblings were made welcome at all of them. I would have found it hard to go otherwise. I also think if the parents are staying then the little ones, crawling or otherwise, will be fine. They'll be enough adults to keep everyone safe and happy.

curlytoes Sun 20-Sep-09 17:13:32

There'll be! My brain is not working today.

Jujubean77 Mon 21-Sep-09 19:44:39

thanks all for your thoughts.. I have decided to hire a hall that way we can accommodate more babies in a separate area. Oh the minefield of social events hey!

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