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40th at home - how to do a party

12 replies

Rainbowblume · 13/02/2018 21:23

I'll have my 40th at home but we will eat at a restaurant first then come back to ours.

Obvs I'll provide drinks, beer, wine, soft drinks maybe a punch or cocktail. And a cake.
Do I need to do snacks? We will have just had a 3 course meal. DH is suggesting fridge full of beer, freezer full of individual mini ice creams on sticks and crisps and sweets. But perhaps olives? Sausage rolls?

Decorations? Do you bother for a 40th?

I've done a play list. We've got one room for dancing and I'm getting disco lights and one room for chatting (kitchen diner) and a small area in the cellar for people who hate parties and just want to play cards/dominoes and smoke.

What else do you do for an adult party. I love games but don't want to interrupt people having a nice chat to make them play a game.

All the ideas on the internet, a giant photo collage in the shape of 40, party giftbags for adults, a photo booth, accessories seem not really me but will music, drinks and a disco suffice?

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BackforGood · 13/02/2018 23:20

Do you mean everyone invited will have been for a 3 course meal, at a restaurant ?
I have to say, if I were invited to celebrate someone's 40th at a restaurant "and the afterwards back at home" I'd only be expecting a coffee - or possibly another glass of wine or a short - and sitting around chatting.
I certainly wouldn't be expecting further food (or even dancing) - I'd assume the meal out were the main event. Depending on your friends, I'd have thought the end of the big meal out in a restaurant would be the time a lot would depart - people getting back for babysitter, etc.

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Rainbowblume · 13/02/2018 23:48

Ah. Right. Yes they are all invited after restaurant meal back to ours. Better not overdo it then. I did put in the invitation there would be drinking and dancing but I suppose quite a few will go home.

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GreenTulips · 13/02/2018 23:56

I'd do a few bags of crisps and nuts - you don't need to over do it, just something to soak up the booze

Most people dislike drinking on a belly full of food - so tends to dull any party / dancing

But that might just be my friends

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TheDowagerCuntess · 14/02/2018 01:30

I've just been to a fab 40th house party, and it was very much an evening, post dinner event, so everyone was ready to party.

It depend how much you want it to be about the nice dinner - or the party afterwards. I wouldn't really be up for an 'all back to mine' after dinner. I mean, what time will it be by then, anyway?

At my friend's, everyone arrived and was handed a drink. They had a photo collage and decorations - wine, bubbly and beers on ice in one room for people to help themselves, and canapé type food handed around early on.

Music obviously, and asnits summer here, people were inside and outside chatting as well. And then novelty shots came out about midnight for the foolhardy. It was a great night, but I don't think a post-dinner 'do' would be quite the same. Everyone's too tired and sedated.

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Ricekrispie22 · 14/02/2018 09:56

Have you already booked the restaurant and how many people are you inviting?

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Rainbowblume · 14/02/2018 11:33

We will be 40 guests. Restaurant is booked and everyone has stated what they want foe their main - as I asked them. So I don't feel like I can say, change of plan, no salmon or steak, canapes at mine instead. I could cancel dessert at the restaurant and do desserts and drinks and cake at ours. Meal will start at 7pm. 2 hours max as everything is pre ordered so no faffing with menus.

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Rainbowblume · 14/02/2018 11:35

Restaurant is literally less than 50 paces from my house so was hoping I wouldn't lose too many.

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Rainbowblume · 14/02/2018 11:37

I'm definitely about the party and not the meal, but thought the restaurant would save me worrying about food.

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nobutreally · 14/02/2018 11:41

Are you paying for the meal or are they? I would certainly be tempted to do cake as pudding back at yours - 3 course meal + cake + nibbles is a bit full on.

I'd do some impactful but low hassle decorations: balloons always work well from that pov. I've been to lots of 40ths where there were photos of the persons life in some form or another (slide show/photo book to look through etc) - it's a nice way to relive memories/bring people together.

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Rainbowblume · 14/02/2018 13:55

nobut I'm paying. So to be honest, as I've put in the invitation - then we are all going back to mine for drinks and dancing I'll be a bit sad if they all run off. Thanks all for your replies.

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nobutreally · 14/02/2018 16:14

You know your mates: mine would not run off if there was a chance of dancing and more drink Wink

BUT if you are worried, a think a clear 'back to mine for cake and tunes' announcement at the end of the meal would be helpful. I think for me it would be more that if I'd sat and been eating for hours, I'd be getting sluggish, and would just need jolly-ing along a little.

Hope you have a fab night Cake Gin

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Rainbowblume · 14/02/2018 18:17

Thanks nobut will definitely do dessert at home and dig out some photos

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