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Anyone else already struggling with them back home?

(13 Posts)
Flymetothetoon Wed 25-Mar-20 20:59:18

DH and I really struggled last year with one adult DC home from university for 8 weeks. Without going into detail DH mental health got so bad he tried to take his own life.

The same DC is home again because of CV and it's been less than a week and already my nerves are jangling and I'm afraid for DH who has slowly rebuilt himself.

I don't want to send DC back to the flat they rent next to uni because I want them near if they get sick but at the same time our house hold already feels rubbish!

What to do?

OP’s posts: |
Blimey1 Wed 25-Mar-20 21:21:54

You have my every sympathy. My DC (18 and 22) are absolutely vile to each other. They can't be in the same room for 5 minutes without having a huge argument. It's extremely depressing. DD1 has said that she wants to go back to her uni house. I don't want her to go but I just can't imagine how we're going to get through 12 weeks of this.

Flymetothetoon Wed 25-Mar-20 21:42:01

Thank you for replying @Blimey1 it's really horrible isn't it? Love DH and love DC but I can't help thinking when I was same age as DC I was totally independent and not giving my parents any bother at all!

OP’s posts: |
Blimey1 Wed 25-Mar-20 22:36:58

Yes, I get that this is a really stressful, worrying time for them, and for everyone, but fighting over stupid things is just making the whole situation even more intolerable. I think we need a house meeting to discuss 'behaviour'

eggandonion Wed 25-Mar-20 22:41:29

My dd is working upstairs online, but broadband isn't amazing. It's better here than her house share if she needs to be isolated - her colleagues are constantly being bothered by parents delivering tea to them.
We are mostly civil.

Aquamarine1029 Wed 25-Mar-20 22:44:36

What is your child doing that is so bothersome? If they can't respect your rules and needs, then they can go back to their own flat.

Travelledtheworld Fri 27-Mar-20 05:27:55

Yes! Have 19YO DS home from Uni living nocturnal lifestyle, round the clock Gaming. Have failed to get him off his arse to apply for supermarket shelf stacking job.
Am making him cook to earn his keep.

eggandonion Fri 27-Mar-20 22:11:49

Trying to stop dh taking tea into dd while she is teleconferencing is a challenge. I'm hoping she will make cake tomorrow.

Ibizafun Sat 04-Apr-20 23:44:34

Travelledtheworld I also have a 19yo ds home enjoying the nocturnal lifestyle with 24/7 gaming and minimal uni work. Fun isn’t it...

exexpat Sat 04-Apr-20 23:48:15

I've got 17-year-old DD home from overseas study three months early. She's good company, but oh, the mess... I had just got used to my empty nest staying clean and tidy and now it is strewn with goodness knows what. It doesn't help that my dishwasher went on the blink just before lockdown.

Sockofthefall Tue 07-Apr-20 14:45:00

My son is home from Uni. However, some of his mates have self-isolated in their accommodation. He is driving me mental. Blaming me for bringing him home. Repeatedly telling me he is going back. He's bored blah, blah, blah. Genuinely wish I'd left him there. Currently hiding for some peace 😁 . Keep pointing out how very uninterested i am. Thinks hes got the hint!😊

Sockofthefall Tue 07-Apr-20 14:49:15

Obviously made worst as he fortunately does have a social conscience & wont do anything silly , like returning.

bigbluebus Tue 07-Apr-20 15:08:31

It's difficult adjusting to having them back especially when there is no end date in sight. We had a discussion about our student DS returning home. DH immediately snapped, if he comes home he needs to get a job!. But DS is in his final year and still has an assignment to do and his dissertation to finish, so getting a job was not really practical.

DS will cook when he's here but he only starts prepping at a time we would normally be eating and insists on cooking something he's looked up on the internet that takes ages to cook. He also makes loads of mess and won't clear up - as he's cooking! He seems to live in a different time zone and it causes friction.

He is currently still in his Uni accommodation and things are relaxed here (apart from the worry of him getting ill 200 miles away and us not being able to go there).

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