To feel guilty about my DD’s MH

lifesabitchandthenyoudie · 2019-11-24 17:50:21

One of my grown-up children is struggling with life and I don’t seem to be able to help her. I did try to help after she moved closer to where I live by giving her support, helping with the house, babysitting etc but I wasn’t well myself at the time and our relationship/how she can behave was making me more ill so I had to step back a fair bit. I still see them all (she has 3 children) at least once a month but I try to keep it light and just be with them rather than 'help'. I know she is upset with me and that her moving closer hasn’t turned out how we both hoped. I don’t know how to get her to help herself more, she seems closed to any help (from support groups, therapists, friends and family) that doesn’t tie in with how she thinks. I’m also worried about how it’s impacting on the children. SS have been involved a few times but they either give empty promises of help then nothing, or the help they offer isn’t what she wants. Her sisters have tried to make suggestions and give advice, but we all live some distance from each other so it’s only been by phone or ‘net. When she has visited them they have really struggled with her as well. I know that much of her illness is due to a difficult childhood; I did my best but I keep feeling it just wasn't good enough. I just want to be able to fix it for her!

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