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Do you think your Mum had an easier ride than you as a modern parent?

(4 Posts)
BrokenWing Sat 20-Jul-19 01:21:17

My mum was a SAHM so didn't have the pressures of work, but raising a family of 5 on one wage in the 60s/70s wouldn't have been easy.

Obviously basics were harder like budgeting, getting the weekly shop (from butchers, fishmonger, baker, green grocer, chemist, grocery) home on the bus, using twin tub for laundry, making and clearing up a meal for 7 every night cleaning/lighting a fire most days for hot water and did our weekly baths etc all with no help from the poor man who was tired after a hard days work.

There were a lot of things parents just didn't do, we didn't have after school activities or many days out we just went out and played, we wore hand downs from brothers/sisters/other relations, we only went to dentists at school, mum cut all our hair, swimming lessons were the 6 weeks provided by school only, school was around the corner and we walked/came home at lunchtime. You worked hard and got the grades you got from the local school, no home tutoring. Girls did a lot of chores to help from quite a young age.

I think even with ft work we have it easier, or at least better.

Wolfff Fri 19-Jul-19 16:46:03

We didn’t have a washing machine or even a fridge until I was about 9 so more difficult in that sense. We never had a dishwasher. Whereas I always had a washing machine, dryer etc.

My mum only started work part time when I was 9 until we were older teens and she got divorced so went full time, whereas I worked full time apart from 3 years.

I also spent less time on housework and more time with kids, especially at organised activities; when I was young we used to play out or go to a local park by ourselves from the age of 7.

Our lives are completely different, she had a violent alcoholic husband she was reluctant to divorce, traumatised kids with behavioural problems (inc me!) and a job in a shop; I have a great husband, great kids and a reasonable career.

Not really a like for like comparison, but her life was awful compared to mine.

HairyDogsInUnusualPlaces Fri 19-Jul-19 16:34:11

My mum says that it was hard for her, and that she had to spend all her time doing housework, which she did. But, she spent no time with us doing activities or taking us anywhere. We were encouraged to go out to play a lot, often for hours and hours at a time. So, yes, she did work hard at household things, but i feel that was her choice (although she may not have felt it was a choice at the time). I choose to spend time with my dc over doing household tasks, so my house is not nearly as spotless as my parents house, (it's not a health hazard, but i could probably put the duster round more than i do, the windows need a bit of a clean and I don't do any ironing). Admittedly having a washing machine and dishwasher streamlines these tasks, but the rest of the house stuff gets neglected in favour of time with the kids. So i think i work just as hard, but doing child related things like playing with them or ferrying them to activities.

dottiedodah Fri 19-Jul-19 15:08:11

Just that really. My Mum worked all week and then had to do washing in the twin tub at W/E ,didnt drive and was always catching up with H/W .Do you think your Mum had an easier time or was it more difficult W/O lots of modern appliances ?

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