Returning home after Uni

[Allfurcoatandnoknickers]

My DS age 21 has just graduated from Uni.
He’s going to learn to drive over the summer and has applied for a couple of seasonal jobs working abroad, so has a few shorter term plans. Just before his final hand in, he broke up with his gf of 3 years and was devastated. He seems very lost and unconfident. Naturally myself and DH are concerned for him and will support him as much as we can- anyone any similar experiences or advice?

[BackforGood]

Sounds like my ds 2 years ago.
It is good - he sounds positive and is making plans. Fair play to him.
ds, tbf to him has worked FT since coming home. Enjoying having a bit of money buying his first car etc. Oh, and the new girlfriend is very nice too.

[Herocomplex]

Poor boy. Hopefully he’ll have graduation to look forward to? I would just give him some opportunities to talk, would he be up for a trip out together? Does he have friends he’s catching up with?

[Allfurcoatandnoknickers]

Yes he’s seeing friends and planning a few things like a biking holiday. He’s struggled all the way through school which wasn’t the right fit for him-he’s not academic and much more ‘arts’- his degree result was disappointing to him (we all think it’s a huge achievement and doesn’t matter) so he’s not that bothered about his graduation, but we are going to it.
I’m hoping he gets some self esteem back - I know it’s not uncommon at the end of Uni and have seen friends kids go through the same.

[Herocomplex]

Good, I think as long as he’s making plans and seeing people he’s doing ok. I’m guessing your real concern is him finding meaningful work? I’m afraid that’s much more difficult guidance wise - it’s finding the right balance of giving information and support that doesn’t make them feel swamped. Best of luck.

[Blue5238]

My sister broke up with long term boyfriend at the end of uni and returned to my folks similarly devastated.
She spent a few months there doing casual work, applied for jobs to start for graduate entry a year later and then went off travelling. I suspect the time to get over it and then go away did her a lot of good.
I think it is positive your ds is making plans etc.

[Allfurcoatandnoknickers]

Yes I agree it’s more about his happiness and self esteem than finding meaningful long term work. I’m hoping if he gets work abroad he’ll meet new people and it’ll give him confidence to start moving on.

[Herocomplex]

I’d give him a few hugs as well if he’ll let you!

[Allfurcoatandnoknickers]

Yes he does!! No shortage of those!! X