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Is it time for me yet?

(2 Posts)
Coffeeground Mon 24-Jun-19 12:05:48

Rant....I have two adult children at home - I'm 68. I just want peace! They both left, then came back after relationship breakups and there seems to be no end in sight. I've read other posts, and there is that common element of guilt we all seem to feel to a greater or lesser extent. I think of the scene in 'Shirley Valentine' when the daughter comes home and demands to looked after as if she was a child again. Shirley buys that ticket to Greece and doesn't come back. I understand that movie now better than ever! Everybody wants looking after!! To be fair if I get sick they'll look after me (including husband). But the difference is it's not a day to day expectation by me that somebody will look after me, let me take my bad mood out on them expecting passive response, get them to do stuff for me and then complain it's not right etc. Shall I just leave? Fuck
guilt ridden motherhood! (38years- I'd get less for murder!!)

PinkDrink Mon 24-Jun-19 14:42:17

No particular words of wisdom Coffee, but didn't want to read and run. I'm still shattered by a particularly vicious row with my adult dd which was caused exactly by the bad mood taking out you describe in your post - basically, she feels she's allowed to snap at me, but if I snap back it's a huge deal, I'm rude and aggressive and bullying her etc etc.

I'm supporting 2 adult dc too, and feeling the practical, emotional and financial pressure. It all gets too much sometimes, and snapping is inevitable, but the emotional fallout is like a tsunami. Of course, I'll still carry on doing washing, cooking, filling the fridge, paying for stuff, in spite of the atmosphere in the house and having just been told how toxic I am.

Sorry, didn't mean to hijack but I do empathise with your situation. Could you go away on your own for a few days at least - not on a one way ticket to Greece, but maybe to stay with a friend? Just to get some headspace and put yourself first for a change.

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