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Aibu to feel upset to learn my son has got engaged via Facebook?

(11 Posts)
Ditto66 Mon 31-Dec-18 19:24:16

Only son has apparently got engaged - everyone knows before me as his fiancée has updated the world via FB. We were with them in Spain 2 days ago and had a nice time - all got on well. I am happy for them, but I just feel devastated to be the last to know such important news. I will of course swallow the hurt, it's their moment not mine. But aibu to feel it?

greendale17 Mon 31-Dec-18 19:26:49

I would be a little hurt. Everyone I knew told their parents first before announcing to anyone else.

Dontknowwhatimdoing Mon 31-Dec-18 19:27:07

YANBU, thats rubbish of them! You are not the last to know though, just not the first.

grinchypants Mon 14-Jan-19 11:13:39

I can't really understand why it would hurt, he hasn't proposed in spite of you. It's between them.

typoqueen Thu 17-Jan-19 19:12:25

i know how you feel, i found out when and where my son was getting married on facebook by her mum, before i even knew they were planning on getting married,

BackforGood Thu 17-Jan-19 23:28:10

Of course YANBU. It is somewhat insensitive.
Wehn my dn got engaged last year, he phoned all of his Aunts / Uncles to tell them individually before putting it in family WhatsApp group. Only after family were told, was it 'publically announced'

CatToddlerUprising Thu 17-Jan-19 23:31:28

YANBU but could be worse- I found out my grandfather died on Facebook as a family member posted it within 15 minutes of his passing and my parent (who was with him) hadn’t had a chance to call me or my siblings.

SandAndSea Thu 17-Jan-19 23:36:57

Yanbu, but it's your son who's been crap here, not your dil. If I was you, I'd make it my business to befriend her. You clearly can't rely on your son to include you and keep you up to date.

Ditto66 Thu 17-Jan-19 23:49:41

Sandandsea turned out that he had wanted to wait to tell me in person, but she couldn't wait and updated her FB status. He didn't know she had. Seems like she was pushing and chose the ring and basically set it all up. He went along with it. They both seem happy though. Sadly typical of future DIL. I try hard to get along with her but she doesn't always make it easy.
I suggested they get the families together for a celebration, which we had a couple of weeks ago. So it's calmed down and is all well.

SandAndSea Fri 18-Jan-19 00:16:09

Oh, well done, OP. It sounds like you're handling it well.

Lulu1919 Wed 30-Oct-19 15:50:48

I'd be hurt too !!!!!!
It's natural that you are
But try and smile and let it go ....to their faces at least !!
Sending hugs from a mum whose daughter recently got engaged...but she did ring me before anyone else knew .

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