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Wedding Day

(2 Posts)
AMBMUM Mon 22-Jan-18 18:43:09

A few weeks ago I received the most wonderful news that my son has proposed to his girlfriend and they are getting married πŸ˜€πŸ˜€ I'm absolutely delighted and I am so happy for both of them. I love her and was so hoping she would be 'the one'. Things seem to be moving quite fast as wedding venues have been visited already! So exciting 😊...but I'm feeling a bit left out as the visits have been with my son's fiancees' parents and I haven't been asked to go too. Is it because they are paying do you think? I've not been approached for any financial assistance but would be more than happy to contribute. I know as a boys Mum I need to take a step back perhaps but I'd love to be involved too...any advice on how to approach this would be really appreciated. I don't want to upset anyone but also do not want to turn up at my son's wonderful day feeling like a guest πŸ˜”

Dangermouse1 Mon 22-Jan-18 19:13:10

If your relationship with both of them is generally good could it just be practicalities e.g. do you all Iive close together or will the wedding be nearer her parents home?

If you would like to help financially I would offer and not wait to be asked. I would never have presumed either set of parents wanted to contribute to our wedding and would have felt cheeky requesting they pay anything, but we were glad to accept help that was offered. If they say the wedding is covered then offer the sum towards honeymoon/house deposit instead. If you are going to offer money make it clear you won't dictate what it is spent on - and mean it!

I would ask them both round for dinner and chat about the plans - ask about the venue and if they have chosen one say you'd love to go with them and have a look around if it's possible, but don't act offended you weren't asked the first time. Offer to help in a general way, make it clear you'd love to get involved but don't want to take over.

Your OP sounds like you are single - are there complications with your ex or any family relationships they might feel awkward about? If so can you put their minds at rest?

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