Talk

Flip

Wondering how to stop worrying about your grown child? Speak to others in our Parents of Adult Children forum.

Parents of adult children

Older child

8 replies

user1485851222 · 01/11/2017 20:59

1st time post.. DS 25, we are very alike, bang heads, stubborn, (But not all the time). He works, lives at home rent free, saving a deposit for mortgage. He has suffered from anxiety in the past, which has caused me endless worries. We argued on the weekend about something silly and we haven't spoken since. Trained, Eaten, room. Spent a couple of nights at girlfriends, she would normally stay here. Tried to break the row and got told everything that is wrong with me. I admit I try to protect him, and don't like to upset him due to anxiety. But why am I the one that is upset and feeling bad and he just carries on as if it doesn't bother him. I worry he'll move out and that will be it....

OP posts:

Report

BackforGood · 02/11/2017 00:26

He is 25. Why are you worried he will move out ?

Surely that is the normal way of life - showing that you've raised him to a man as it were?

Report

user1485851222 · 02/11/2017 12:57

Sorry I didn't mean that. I'm excited for him to move out. I meant I'm worried he'll move out and our relationship will fade away. It will be good for him to have his own place. I've tried making up and he replied with my faults... when we clash we clash

OP posts:

Report

FrancisCrawford · 02/11/2017 13:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

user1485851222 · 02/11/2017 17:33

Apparently pointing these things out, is me throwing in his face what I do for him, when we are rowing. Which I must admit I do... heard myself say the other day, you'll realise when you have children of your own

OP posts:

Report

FrancisCrawford · 02/11/2017 18:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Foxedme · 02/11/2017 18:12

I could've written this myself. I have almost the same situation with my 19 year old daughter. Only she's obviously younger, but the walking on egg shells and rows sounds bang on. She's at her boyfriend's house a lot and I'm flipping grateful. I feel your pain x

Report

user1485851222 · 02/11/2017 20:09

Francis thanks for replying. I give as good as I get, so I'm not innocent. He works hard, we get on generally. Just when we do fall out, we fall out. I think i just suffer every parents guilt... he doesn't expect me to pay for everything, he just doesn't pay rent.. I'm just fed up of being the bad guy. But this time I've stuck up for myself

OP posts:

Report

user1485851222 · 02/11/2017 20:11

Hi Foxedme. Not much fun is it.. I worry more and feel guilty more now he is an adult than when he was little..