How to stop the whingeing......?

[Mo2]

DS2 has just turned 3 and compared to DS1 (now 5 ) at the same age is just a constant whinger...

It's a whiney, irritating whingeing/ shrieking ( "nooooooooooo!") which is triggered by anything, however trivial, which doesn't suit him. Sometimes it escalates to a full tantrum, sometimes we manage to diffuse it.

There's no doubt DS1 'winds him up' - moves his trains on the railway line when he isn't looking, teases him etc. But to be fair, I think DS2 'protests too much'.

It drives me up the wall, and when I'm stressed or tired really makes me angry and short-tempered. We're about to go on holiday in a few weeks time and I know the stress of the heat and travel will make it even worse.

Anyone got any strategies to 'stop the wingeing' ????

[lunavix]

Ignore him.

[Mo2]

Tried that a lot - doesn't really work - he gets so worked up he ends up giving himself with a mini-asthma attack!

[Caligula]

Ah, the holy grail.

Will watch this with interest...

[Mo2]

Caligula - oops - that wasn't a veiled 'check the archives' comment was it?

[Nickinha]

Will be keeping an eye on this one!!!!~

My dd (2.5yrs) can not speak, everything is a whine! Mommeee want Barrrneeeyyy... I have started to tell her that if she does not speak properley I cant understand her! So when she whines, I tell her to speak properly and 1 / 10 times she changes her tune... early days yet... Hope that bit helps you

[Starsky]

Apart from ignoring, the other thing I try is to encourage my 2.8 year old DD to ask/say things 'nicely'. So, if she is whinging about having a biscuit, wanting a toy, getting down from the table etc etc. I say 'I am not answering until you ask nicely.' Then I give an example of what it is 'Can I have the train back please' and then DD will say it too. It doesn't work all the time, but works some of the time. I am hoping that over a period of time she will realise that asking gets better results than whinging!!

[loupylou]

We've tried ignoring and i agree it doesn't always work ,but we've moved on to "i can't hear you" now dd talks properly because she can't bear not to be heard!

[Caligula]

No not at all, just that I think I've tried every technique ever suggested and ds still whinges!

[SabineJ]

What seems to be working with DS1 (2 years old now) is to stay as calm as possible. The more he can sense that I am annoyed by his wingeing, the more he is grumbling and shouting (which is making me even more angry and then I usually end up shouting at him ... ).
So I keep on repeating that he should use his "nice" voice and asking him what he wants (Do you wamt me to give a toast ?).
Seems to work BUT is incredibly hard work !